He’s read by anger. He says it beautifully and sweetly. I saw the changes up front. He’s just so confused, afraid. I feel sorry for him. It’s his lowest book, give you trouble.
He doesn’t know what to do with himself. I’ve already got complaint. Pound the report. He keeps forgetting the name of the trashcan they threw him in the night it happened.
You’ll do exactly what I say to waters, to water. It pulls him. He does it. He masturbates in front of his father and mother. I have a question. Why do they want him to masturbate? You would think it would be the other way around. It was. It’s soon to be pleasure house.
There, there now the father’s hand. You’ll get a rise out of me in a minute with this. After that he met the strong end of the law. Come help, and Sandiya slapped him as he pulled, pulls his red car. He felt his little toy rear end. He screamed, and his father pulled it by the roots again. Now, he was hysterical, and that’s how he got into the bathroom with his mother, and then she syphoned his little pony to sooth, golden fellatio.
Son of a bitch, this is horrible news. The vision is exactly what happened, all the ponies included, and we rest our case here. It’s too lost to talk about, and that boy’s underwear is scared. This was the opening for him to destroy himself. This made him blight his tears for me. He couldn’t believe it had happened, and he kept tryin’ to forget about it. It was a horror story out of Genghis Khan.
Now it’s on Facebook, and you don’t believe it. I’m sorry it’s true. Spiritual vision shows it, and it has shown it all along. You just didn’t hear me the first time. Now they put all of this on him, the surveillance cameras, the total control, the psychological manipulation, the physical abuse, so he wouldn’t tell me what happened that night, and that’s why, dear ladies and gentlemen, he can have no contact with me whatsoever, in any shape for form.
They do not know about consciousness. They think you can hide somethin’ they did to a little boy, and I’m in union with him. They don’t know about consciousness. They think we’re separated, and we communicate daily. The boy’s gotten fluffed about it, and is trying to ignore it. He wants to accept this abuse and move on. He has been ruined in character, totally humiliated where he meets the world, and is scared to death of his parents when they’re in their wrath. He will do anything for them, except tell me to get lost.
Okay now that’s you’ve heard the story what are you gonna do? Nothin’. We haven’t crossed this bridge before. You just listen to stories. No one will question this kid with the proper treatment. They let his mother rule, and she is not good to him. Okay Pondy it’s your stuff. You need to see this, because this boy died on the Cross so you wouldn’t abuse your children. Can you figure me here?
He’s a representative example of what you do to children, just so exaggerated so it has the impact it has to show you abuse is wrong. You don’t know about representative figures. They’re a holy book. They are like a Christ, and you need to see them so you can get the full effect. This is godly awful, isn’t it?
Imagine what it’s like to be one with this child, sharing consciousness together no holds barred, and then he’s taken from me and has this done to him, and I have to watch a helpless observer. I screamed and I carried on to advocates, the TV news, and the Child Help Line. No one would question that kid or even worry about it. I was a crazy lark that needed to shut up, but I’m an activist, and I know my stuff. This story has gone out to every major NGO in the country that deals with child’s rights and preventing them from being abused, several Pondy TV news channels, and every major newspaper in the country. This story will get out, when the election’s over.
There’s no stoppin’ it now, and I’ll be right there to receive that boy to take him home and heal him, because that’s what union does. You’re unified on oneness, and systems of abuse do not have ground of being. It’s a union story of love and kindness. It’s oneness’ story, the heart of compassion, knowledge of one another where the soul sees.
I’m sorry I’m teachin’ yah new things. You’re not good with innovative stuff when it involves the terms and conditions of our being, what a human being is, and how it tries to rise up out of human being into the next class. I give you there with this kid. That’s our endeavor together, to change man.
Now tell me again I can’t heal this kid, but the truth of the matter is that we’ll heal each other. I’m in the same shape he’s in, only I will take the lead because I’m his daddy, and daddies, my sweet audience, really do know best. Thank you Pondicherry for letting him heal at my house, his home before all this started, his place of refuge and safety, a place of loving dog.
And that, my dear friends, is where this chapter ends. Did you know dogs are with us to become human beings? The soul says this, and evolution’s its spur. That’s why they live in our homes. That’s why they’re our children. They have an appointment with destiny when they change to the higher kind, and for a mountain of dog lives they learn the ways of human being, until they become a Lisa, my beloved dead Rottweiler, and they have the magic of human being in their eyes growin’ their understanding inside. They have reached the pinnacle of dog, and our house raises dog, and that boy’s right in the middle of it, lovin’ those dogs and those dogs lovin’ him. Imagine how his dogs felt when he was taken. They’ve never seen him again.
We have the ingredients for healing I tell you, even in the notion of dream. It’s candy for us. What did you dream last night? And we all tell. We have a healing house, and we’re ready for this boy to return. Now Pondicherry we’re a prototype, and you’ve gotta be big enough to see it. You’re a big enough town for it. The supramental manifestation on Earth descended here first. You grapple with big things. It’s time you knew that, and it’s you Pondicherry, you, that replaces Jerusalem as the city of hope, the city of peace, and we’re here to help you with that, me and this boy. Okay Pondicherry, let us heal.
You’ll have to give me the man roles. What have we here? Look at this kid, strangely peacock even in defeat. Are you listenin’ Pondicherry? Tell me a secret. I get him smooth. You crazy person, you’re by the wall; I’ll try not to tell you to get lost after the election.
We are the soul rise, he and I, and I understand your concern, and I understand your confusion. Boy get it to become man, and we’re hit Pondicherry on the head of its going to school. Now laugh at that will yah, and tell me I’m a fool. You haven’t read his poetry yet, nor seen that strength of soul. Just sit back and relax and review our material. Videos, poems, and songs will knock your socks off, will do your head in, will be kind and gentle and sweet, every time you see us talk, but we will be loud, and awfully bright.
Now here am I in front of Pondicherry, goodnight. Hey, can I get you something? Do you need to cut us up in pieces and throw it away? You don’t need to do anything except go with the movement. We know how to ride the storm. What happened? You heard the story that they took ‘im and all that ensued, and I am his daddy, and I would like to raise him again. All sorts of thought we give you Pondicherry. One came in a dog suit. Vision of Luna. (vision of my Rottweiler standing outside near a wood) The wrong people have that boy now. You need to see this and make it right. You can see the future in us if you look hard enough.
Nithish and his daddy, now that’s an item. There’s no reason to fear that now. He’ll be at break tomorrow. The train station on Friday comin’ here. I’ll have to turn him in the grocery store, and toys, many presents, we let him have. He’s got a healin’ train a comin’, and it’s at the station now.
What an active young man. Who are you? The poet of the sunrise of humanity. Let’s move his truck, and he can express that, and I’m his keeper, and I’m his teacher there at dawn too. Please hear us. We’re the Milky Way. We’ve got good news, the colors in the rainbow, either in social media or every place you meet us on the street. That’s rock bottom vision. It goes like this: do you hear our pull? We’re a look out for human beings. Can I wash off the dog? Get it right with human beings.
Nithish is with his parents. Don’t say anything now. One for… (vision of Nithish sitting at a computer and his mother and auntie are standing behind him, Sandiya taking a photo of him with a flat, silver, square camera, telling him to pose, and I realize they are taking a photo record of him to compete with mine, making a sudden concentrated effort to do that to rival the photos I post of him) It looks like a photo shoot, and they’ve got the video to prove it. And there he is. I had no idea. Nithish you’re asking me a question: where do you divide the partition? As long as you’re careful not to do that, tear me apart, we wouldn’t partition ourselves. Your parents are using you for propaganda. They’re taking pictures to rival me. I took spontaneous pictures of you. The difference is tearing me apart.
You’re open to they put you here they put you there, like they’re doin’ it for you, and you give them that warm smile, thinking you have their business. It’s not the same baby dog, and I wonder if you can even feel it, so lost you are in their approval and validation, so far you are away from me. I don’t like Bozos, Bozo the Clown. Put that on the street.
Grace school is himself. (vision of Grace his Beagle puppy standing in a table chair on her hind legs with her front paws on the table) He’s in his underwear. He’s big and small and little and mean. He won’t take no for an answer. He’s not dedicated to you, and something happened that changed his mind. You did not seem relief. You were not there for him. You didn’t come, and you were crazy with grief. You wanted to see him so badly it turned him away from you. He doesn’t respect you. He believes the brainwashing. He doesn’t know what’s up. He doesn’t care to find out. You want to know if he’s happy and doesn’t need you. He can’t find himself. He’s alone on the inside, and if you can’t see sadness in his eyes, you can feel it in his heart. He wants to see you and need is comin’.
He doesn’t understand what’s happened. He’s too little for that. He wants so see you help. He has not gained by loosing you. His life is something forcing. He’s a painted doll. You are his flower. He just wants to sit and be with you, but he doesn’t want to see this too loudly. He doesn’t want to be in the garbage can anymore with his parents. All that’s over. That he doesn’t renounce you that’s okay. They just keep him from you, and the phone call the other day they got by. You’re crazy and confused his mind was their answer.
And now you’ve declared you’re gonna die to see ‘im, hunger strike. I’m in trouble. This will all fall on me. Hear him now? Is he worried about you? They don’t want him to be but yes. He doesn’t want you to die. Will he do anything to stop it? He would try.
Now all this bad news, that makes you feel so bad, is gonna change. When you see him again you’ll know you’re there, and he will remember past lives, and he’ll want it there. He’ll reveal secrets. He will be with you in every heartbeat, and this will open that boy’s mind to convince his parent’s of his need to see you. This is incredible news and will change the story. He will be yours again, and they will have to contend with that.
Is there a public on the way? It happened. The public got wind of this, and you’re showin’ it to them now. You’re in the Pondy poems, and this one’s the big one for their being’s worth.
He has my note. He has my seven. We need him to see you, and that’s soon. He doesn’t know which way is up. And you’re gonna show him Heaven’s door. (vision of Nithish sitting on the curb of a street and looking up at me with such open love) He’s the taste in your room. You’re his special surprise. He knows you’re comin’. Will you listen to me? This was our world, the great and hidden pain of death. And you’ve got me on time, before I forgot you. There I’ll see you on Friday. You make the test model fight too. It’s prevision, and it will become active soon.
Oh there were his plug pluses down there. There were him. “The samadhi of the Gods is in my heart water drops.” He will felt good listenin’. Have you watched your video yet? I’m not lookin’ to do that. What’s wrong with you? No contact with me, that and I want you to leave me alone. Two notes from the ranger. You are being awfully bad. We have to waste time here and I show it to you. Here, and will you come when they ask? I would go in a heartbeat. But you won’t watch the video? I’m scared to feel the pain. I don’t want to remember you. I don’t want to cry. Alright little boy, you aren’t the greatest little boy in the world, but I will see you soon.
So you can go and tell on them. That was Nithish’s muse. He has purpose. He has charm. He has the call to action. We’re gonna get this story read to the public. What did they expect? He had come so far. They brainwashed him in the family. He didn’t give them what they want: to renounce me over the phone in a controlled conversation.
I was emotionally distraught, aggravated, and it came across on the phone, and then I calmed down and talked to my baby dog. He heard me. I could hear his mother in the background telling him what to say. I mentioned everything I could think of to get him to hear me. We actually had a conversation. I was able to tell him things his mother cut the phone. They called back, and the mother tried again. I’m with them now the boy said. Do you want to see me I asked. He had already answered yes to that question in the conversation ago. No answer, I asked again. Yes he said. I will move Heaven and Earth to see you again I told the boy.
Do you love me more than anything in the world, or was that a lie? I wasn’t lying. Do you want me to go back to America? No the boy replied. Well I’ll do a hunger strike, and I’m prepared to die. The boy heard every word I said. Hello again, I’m sorry baby dog, I cannot live without you, and I love you more than anything in the world. Ask to see me. Do not stop. But they will not hear me. Ask anyway, and the divine will help.
The mother cut the phone again, as I explained their brainwashing technique, and then I talked to her. He doesn’t want to see you she said. But you heard him say he did. Leave it, leave it. No woman I won’t. I am not afraid to die, and I will lay down my life for him. On that she cut the phone.
Well here, here, let’s have a toast to her inability to brainwash him. He was supposed to renounce me. He did not. Even in front of his mother he admitted he loved me very much and wanted to see me. She had failed in killing his love for me. Now how’s that for an answer to their control of him? They don’t have it. Isn’t that wonderful? Love will find a way.
Thank you woman. You are so very dumb letting us speak like that, and you know we love each other. You really think the boy’s gonna lie for you? He did not, did he? And you are tellin’ him what to say. I say again. You did not control this boy when it came down to it, the very thing you’ve been punishing him for, he loves his daddy and wants to see him, and all the restrictions that you’ve put on ‘im, all the surveillance you’ve had him under, all the control you’ve done to him, telling him what to think, how to act, and how he should feel, day and night on that boy, has not worked, has it? I’m still there in that boy’s heart, in that boy’s mind, a living presence. The power of love, do you believe in it now?
Now we go from there. I have his base. I have his will, and I will stop at nothing to see him again. That mother has messed up. She gave us the very thing we needed from each other: validation of our love. She has no idea what’s she’s doing in keeping him from me. It’s against his will. It’s against his plan. It’s against his life’s purpose. It hurts this boy so.
So what do we do with that? Hello Pondy do you recognize me? I am a public speaker. I want to show you child abuse where the parents get away with it because no one will listen to the foreign man. You think that’s right? Well here let me show you how I do things, in video after video, and can I show you this story? Follow my Facebook page. Now who’s listenin’ I ask the interviewer. Will you help this boy become himself again, step out of systems of abuse and let his daddy heal him?
Okay Pondicherry we put you to the test. It’s a public ride. Do you care about this boy? Why have the parents taken all his rights? Do they have the right to abuse him? Do I have no rights as a parent? And I have been raising him for years. Wait ‘till you hear why they took ‘im, on impulse, for a bad story they did, and I called them on it. It’s all on Facebook. Just look and see Donny Lee Duke.
Now we’re goin’ somewhere. He listens to me, and we are there: we get to see each other again. We get to be together, and we can heal wounds. Thank you Pondicherry. I know you care about children, and I didn’t even have to hunger strike. I just got interviewed by a member of the press, and we took this story wide. Now that’s business. That’s coffee, and that’s how you shame two parents who have been evil to their child. You give them a public face, and suddenly the sex video they made of their child doesn’t look for fun anymore. It looks awfully deep, their betrayal of their children in their parenting room. Do you hear me Pondicherry? You will.
This is the sudden story that shows you how to raise children, and that’s not with a bat with a glove. They get the best treatment because they are our future, and they do not live for us. They live to be themselves in the future God has put them on Earth for, their soul’s purpose in time. That Pondicherry is why we raise children, to bring a better Earth to the love that they’ve found God, atheists included in this survey. We just go the highest we can go in bringing a human being to the heights of humanity. That’s that little child you know, and here, here, we let them grow. Any objections? I thought not.
Well let’s go. This little boy needs your help, and we are waiting. Thank you God. Thank you world. I knew I could count on you, and it’s over. We raise the world that way. That’s how you do it. I agree with that. We put the night we lie in in that abuse. Do they play with his toy? No it’s not pumped. It’s not his genitals they play with. They play with his mind. I’ll never go over here to sleep, where I’m soft and warm and comfortable at daddy’s house.’
He lies there awake at night wondering at the enormity of his loss, and the hope and the despair rob his mind of sleep. There they abuse him in the night’s deep. If you listen really closely you can hear him cry Oh God why have you done this to me? I thought I was your child. And his faith is gone, and the night’s this huge monster that gives him nightmares. Great the feelings play along being’s edge to make him want to die. Do you hear this Pondicherry? Listen closely. This boy needs our help. Will you just let him lie?
What do you do with that? Let’s go in the kitchen and think some, drink some coffee. You know that is a velacara man. Do you do this to our own kind, let a foreigner raise the alarm? That’s the real question here, isn’t it? The abuse is secondary. Whether it’s Hindi kidnappers or a velacara man, you will not blame yourselves for your own stolenings. You need the world to change. Alright Pondicherry, let this boy and this man be together, who for years been under your wings? They belong there. You’ve seen them so much on your streets, in your shops and in your downtown, and look at them there on the beach. They’ve been in your heart Pondicherry ever so long. Just ask the guidebook, all your surveillance cameras. They’re nice together, aren’t they? For years.
This is cross country skiing, and you go to Pondicherry. An ape has his hand, his mother on the phone. Can we tell you the guidebook? Bilbo Baggins, I just wanna see ‘im. (vision of him sleeping) I’ll walk to the landing. Where were you again Patricia, Ovid? The boy has not stayed with you in his first awakening. He will come back to you soon. I gave him a story, but not in his department. I met him online. Hobbits are peace lovin’ folks you know [line heard sung] I have the quarter to knock this out in him, his return to brainwash, and that’s America. There’s a picture. Now come on, what have we here? That’s a beautiful rose. We’re goin’ in a cop shop, and that’s gonna interrupt everybody. It arms to daddy’s house.
I’m pretty sure your mother’s lying to you about the presentation of that video. Watch the video. She’ll let me do it at the capitol, where we met yesterday. What pad you had no idea. Ah, that close to my home in Kuruchikuppam. Three more packages. That will change everything: you see each other again, and the video starts making updates. You see that boy again. You’re standin’ tall. You’re standin’ fast.
ஆங்கிலப் பதிப்பிற்குப் பிறகுதான் தமிழ் மொழிபெயர்ப்பு.
Can you show me what he’s hiding? Can you show me what he’s seen? Twelve feet in him (horrible vision of Nithish drowning in an indoor swimming pool, only his face visible, on it terror and pain) the psychological manipulation of his tears. Where he bothered you: he’s gonna have to clean up the horse and the skin his mother gave him and all his father’s done. This has been gross, ugly, and mean. It’s nonstop it hasn’t let up. This is hurt him deep in being’s ways. His warm heart is gone.
He’s not himself. He’s not even trying. He would like to just go to bed. He acts normal and sweet, and then he flies off the handle at the slightest provocation. He can’t deal with himself. He’s scared to be alone. He’s spends his time alone in the middle of everybody. He would like to kill himself sometimes. He hates himself for giving in to his parents. He doesn’t know how to deal with the string between his legs. It’s all confusing for him.
He doesn’t know where is up. He would like to let go. He doesn’t know how to talk if anyone asks him about daddy. He loves daddy, but he can’t remember him properly. He’s a very unhappy little boy behind that smile of his, and here’s where we find his pain: he has to hide it, or his parents get mad at him, and here there is no relief.
Why is he crying his unwashed tears? You would not hear a tear. In the very beginning this was shut up inside him when his mother shut off those tears to keep him from reminding her she’d done wrong in taking him from daddy, so abruptly, so cruelly, and so never see him again. This broke the boy’s mind, made him languish on himself, took his heart and tore it in two where no hope that it ever mend, and this is what he carries around to this day.
Now you laugh at him for being weak, being such a titty-baby, or you frown on him. He’s never mentioned his daddy’s name or that he wants to see him, but he cannot speak I tell you, and I’ve shown you all these gears inside, but the day is coming this boy will explode, and he will tell everything his parents have done to him to make daddy a phantom in his mind and a dead man in his heart. To take this love this sweet boy had and make him kill it in himself, you have not seen this day the boy lets all this out. What do you think his silence is saying? “I’m going to explode I’m going to explode.” And there will be heart keeps showing the world what he’s seen. No one will doubt what his parents have done to him, and no one will doubt what he needs. He needs daddy.
That’s good for children. They need to hear it, and it’s eleven o’clock. And who’s name do we use? A fighting chance. Where is the boy? Emergency who can’t be seen, but you know he’s there. Look in your photographs. This will arrange things. This is what he needs to see. It’s good for him sweetheart. Don’t worry. This is not next year. He’s coming upon this now, and it’s a long ways away from his certain grasp of himself.
He comes to her with such a smile, and he knows I’m in pain. It was your mother’s pride. Will he hurt his daddy? No my sweet boy you’re okay with me, and the festival tomorrow we did run. Did you know that? Give it to him fiercely and nicely, this boy’s destiny, why so much pain. He’s the poet of a sunrise, and he will help children everywhere from systems of abuse.
See you tomorrow twisting, turning, and he knows there’s a difference between what his mother tells him and what I do. This isn’t fair him. You need to see his face. There are bruises on it from a gifted childhood right at the point they put a said on the planet. Are you game for watching heroes? Watch this boy. Now will you help? I’d like to see him. There.
சொல்லப்படாத கண்ணீரின் அழுத்தம்
அவர் மறைத்து வைத்திருப்பதைக் காட்ட முடியுமா? அவர் பார்த்ததை எனக்குக் காட்ட முடியுமா? அவருக்குள் பன்னிரெண்டு அடிகள் அவரது கண்ணீரின் உளவியல் கையாளுதல். (உள்துறை நீச்சல் குளத்தில் மூழ்கி நித்திஷின் பயங்கரமான பார்வை, அவன் முகம் மட்டும் தெரியும், அதில் பயங்கரமும் வலியும்) அவர் உங்களை எங்கே தொந்தரவு செய்தார்: அவர் குதிரையை சுத்தம் செய்ய வேண்டும் மற்றும் அவரது தாய் அவருக்கு கொடுத்த தோல் மற்றும் அவரது தந்தை செய்த அனைத்தும். இது மொத்தமாகவும், அசிங்கமாகவும், மோசமானதாகவும் இருந்தது. இது இடைவிடாது அது விடவில்லை. இது அவரை காயப்படுத்துகிறது இருப்பின் வழிகளில் ஆழமாக. அவரது சூடான இதயம் போய்விட்டது.
அவர் தானே இல்லை. அவர் முயற்சி செய்வதும் இல்லை. அவர் படுக்கைக்குச் செல்ல விரும்புகிற. அவர் இயல்பாகவும் இனிமையாகவும் செயல்படுகிறார், பின்னர் அவர் கைப்பிடியில் இருந்து பறக்கிறது சிறிய ஆத்திரமூட்டலில். அவர் தன்னை சமாளிக்க முடியாது. அவர் தனியாக இருக்க பயப்படுகிறார். அவர் தனது நேரத்தை தனியாக செலவிடுகிறார் அனைவருக்கும் நடுவில். சில சமயங்களில் தன்னைக் கொல்ல விரும்புவார். விட்டுக்கொடுப்பதற்காக அவர் தன்னை வெறுக்கிறார் அவரது பெற்றோருக்கு. அவர் கால்களுக்கு இடையில் இருக்கும் சரத்தை எப்படி சமாளிப்பது என்று தெரியவில்லை. அவனுக்கு எல்லாமே குழப்பமாக இருக்கிறது.
அவனுக்கு தெரியாது எந்த திசையில் எந்த திசையில் மேலே செல்ல வேண்டும். அவர் விட்டுவிட விரும்புகிறார். அவருக்குப் பேசத் தெரியாது அப்பாவைப் பற்றி யாராவது அவரிடம் க daddy. அவர் daddy நேசிக்கிறார், ஆனால் முடியாது ஆனால் அவரை சரியாக நினைவில் கொள்ள முடியவில்லை. அவர் இப்போது மிகவும் மகிழ்ச்சியற்ற சிறு பையன். அவன் புன்னகையின் பின்னால் அவருடைய வலியை இங்கே காணலாம்: அவர் அதை மறைக்க வேண்டும் அல்லது அவனுடைய பெற்றோர் அவன் மீது கோபம் கொள்கிறார்கள், மற்றும் இங்கே நிவாரணம் இல்லை.
கழுவாத கண்ணீரை ஏன் அழுகிறார்? நீங்கள் கண்ணீர் கேட்க மாட்டீர்கள். ஆரம்பத்திலேயே இது அவருக்குள் மூடியிருந்தது அவன் அம்மா அந்த கண்ணீரை அணைத்த போது அவள் தவறு செய்ததை அவளுக்கு நினைவூட்டுவதைத் தடுக்க daddy விடமிருந்து அவரை அழைத்துச் செல்வதில், மிகவும் திடீரென்று, மிகவும் கொடூரமாக, அதனால் அவன் daddy வை இனி பார்க்கவே மாட்டான். அது சிறுவனின் மனதை உடைத்தது மனம். இது அவனை தன்னுள் புதைத்துக்கொள்ள வைத்தது. இது அவரது இதயத்தை எடுத்து இரண்டாகப் பிரித்தது, மற்றும் அது எப்பொழுதும் சரியாகும் என்ற நம்பிக்கை இல்லை. அவர் இதை எல்லா இடங்களிலும் கொண்டு செல்கிறார் இந்த நாள் வரைக்கும்.
இப்போது நீங்கள் மிகவும் சிறிய பையனைப் போல நடந்த கொள்வதற்காக அவரைப் பார்த்து சிரிக்கிறீர்கள் அல்லது நீங்கள் அவரை முகம் சுளிக்கிறீர்கள். அவர் daddy வின் பெயரைக் குறிப்பிடவில்லை, அல்லது அவர் அவரைப் பார்க்க விரும்புகிறார். ஆனால் அவரால் பேச முடியாது, நான் உங்களுக்கு சொல்கிறேன். இந்த கியர்களை எல்லாம் அவருக்குள் காட்டியிருக்கிறேன். ஆனால் நாள் வருகிறது இந்த சிறுவன் வெடிக்கப் போகிறான் என்று. அவர் எல்லாவற்றையும் சொல்வார் அவரது பெற்றோர் செய்தார்கள் அதனால் அவர் daddy வை ஒரு மாயத்தோற்றம் என்று நினைப்பார் அவரது மனதில் மற்றும் அவரது இதயத்தில் ஒரு இறந்த மனிதன். இந்த இனிய சிறுவனை daddy மீதான காதலை கொல்ல வைக்க, இந்த நாளை நீங்கள் பார்க்கவில்லை சிறுவன் அதையெல்லாம் வெளியே விடுகிறான். அவருடைய மௌனம் என்ன சொல்கிறது என்று நினைக்கிறீர்கள்? "நான் வெடிக்கப் போகிறேன், நான் வெடிக்கப் போகிறேன்." மற்றும் அவர் தனது இதயத்தில் என்ன வைத்திருக்கிறார் அவர் பார்த்ததை உலகுக்குக் காட்டுகிறது. அவனுடைய பெற்றோர் அவனுக்கு என்ன செய்தார்கள் என்று யாரும் சந்தேகிக்க மாட்டார்கள். அவருக்கு என்ன தேவை என்பதை யாரும் சந்தேகிக்க மாட்டார்கள். அவருக்கு daddy தேவை.
அது குழந்தைகளுக்கு நல்லது. அவர்கள் அதைக் கேட்க வேண்டும். இப்போது மணி பதினொன்று. மேலும் யாருடைய பெயரைப் பயன்படுத்துகிறோம்? ஒரு சண்டை வாய்ப்பு. பையன் எங்கே? நெருக்கடி யாரை பார்க்க முடியாது, ஆனால் அவர் அங்கு இருக்கிறார் என்பது உங்களுக்குத் தெரியும். உங்கள் புகைப்படங்களில் பாருங்கள். இது விஷயங்களை ஏற்பாடு செய்யும். அவர் பார்க்க வேண்டியது இதுதான். இது அவருக்கு நல்லது அன்பே. கவலைப்படாதே. இது அடுத்த வருடம் அல்ல. அவர் இப்போது இதைப் பற்றி வருகிறார், மற்றும் அது வெகு தொலைவில் உள்ளது இப்போது அவர் தன் மீது வைத்திருக்கும் பிடியில் இருந்து.
அவர் ஒரு புன்னகையுடன் அவளிடம் வருகிறார், மற்றும் நான் வலியில் இருக்கிறேன் என்பதை அவர் அநாங்கள் தலைமை தாங்கினோம் என்றுறிவார். அது உன் தாயின் பெருமை. அவர் daddy வை காயப்படுத்துவாரா? இல்லை என் இனிய பையன் நான் உன்னுடன் நன்றாக இருக்கிறேன். மற்றும் நாளை திருவிழா நாங்கள் தலைமை தாங்கினோம் என்று. உனக்கு அதை பற்றி தெரியுமா? அதை அவருக்கு கடுமையாகவும் அழகாகவும் கொடுங்கள், இந்த பையனின் விதி, ஏன் இவ்வளவு வலி. அவர் ஒரு சூரிய உதயத்தின் கவிஞர், மற்றும் அவர் எல்லா இடங்களிலும் குழந்தைகளுக்கு உதவுவார் துஷ்பிரயோகம் செய்யப்படுவதிலிருந்து.
நாளை சந்திப்போம், என்று திருப்புவதும் முறுக்குவதும். ஒரு வித்தியாசம் இருப்பதை அவர் அறிவார் அவனுடைய அம்மா அவனிடம் சொல்வதிலிருந்து மற்றும் நான் என்ன செய்கிறேன். இது அவருக்கு நியாயமில்லை. அவன் முகத்தைப் பார்க்க வேண்டும். ஒரு திறமையான குழந்தை பருவத்திலிருந்தே அதில் காயங்கள் உள்ளன என்று புள்ளியில் உள்ளது முழு கிரகமும் அதைப் பற்றி பேசியது. ஹிரோஸ் பார்க்க வேண்டுமா? இப்போது நீங்கள் உதவுவீர்களா? தயவுசெய்து அவரைப் பார்க்க எனக்கு உதவுங்கள். அங்கு.
For Nithish it has to be longer than five minutes, and no mother present. What’s wrong with this? It gives him room to breathe. He can be himself again. He doesn’t have to obey his parents. He can see me freely and openly and clearly. He can tell me anything he wants. We can be together without any interference from anyone else. We can be our special relationship. I can explain things to him. He can explain things to me. He can tell me what he wants from me, and how he feels about me, and what he expects me to do. We can be together again.
If you are looking for total control, you’re not gonna get it, Sandiya and Sundar. He has needs that you are not meeting. In not letting him see me you’re only meeting your own. Why are your needs so much more important than his? You are offended that I threatened you with this and that. I was genuinely hurt when Sandiya brought a policeman to put me in jail. I have made no case or complaint against you. I have merely tried to see Nithish, because I know he needs me too, and to cut me out of his life like that, because you were angry with me, and allow no contact whatsoever, has brutalized this boy, broken his heart, torn his mind, and made him at times wish he were dead. He cannot tell you these things. There is not that level of trust there. He cannot trust you not to beat him, scold him, or tell him how he should think and feel. You are not on his side. You are on yours.
I am a parent of this child. Reality shows that not some legal piece of paper. You disregard that like it’s nothing. Take the time to view these videos, and tell me I am a bad parent, and I have nothing to give him that is valuable for his future life. I can give him things you cannot. You can give him things that I can’t. Why are you being so selfish about this boy? Why do you want to own him so? Is it a matter of pride? He’s yours and you want him and that’s it? Is it because I’m a foreigner, and we are all devils? Or is it because he loves me so, as much as he loves you, and you just can’t stand that?
What about his needs? That’s what I’m talking about here, and I’m showing you that I meet. I have asked you for time alone with him, so he and I can determine what we want. Are you afraid he will put you in jail? That’s not our intention or our aim. We simply want to be together again, and I’m asking for a first meeting to allow that to happen, slowly, and with everybody’s goodwill, not some final meeting where he’s forced to say goodbye, and you have pumped him with what he should say, and you are there guarding him so he will say it. Are you sure you know right from wrong? You are not being right here.
Let’s talk about the future Nithish. You have broken his heart, crushed the love of one of the most important people in his life, made his mind think badly about me, mean things, and you expect him to be a decent person, a good man? You have killed love, and you have killed his kindness, and you have killed his compassion. What can of man will he become? A mean man.
What kind of boy is he now? Is he disconfigured? How easily does he become aggressive, or angry? Is he often rude? Does he brood a lot? Does he get lost in himself? Where has the Nithish gone, that not so perfect boy before you took him? He was not perfect but he was a good little boy, kindhearted and understanding. Now all the bad elements have taken over in him, have they not?
I know you see a difference. Look at his weight. I’m sorry Sandiya he played outside here too. You can see the videos. He did not just sit around all the time. So where did all that weight go? He’s been very unhappy inside, emotionally upset, sick in his heart and aggravated in his mind, and the control you put on him, to keep him away from me, a boy just putting on his teenage wings, is enough to make any boy mad.
Why are you doing all of this I ask again. Did he do anything wrong? He loves a foreign man and prefers that hand to raise him over yours. That’s his great sin. He needs you he needs me, but he prefers the home that I give him, and I think we’ve hit the soul of your anger. You’re mad at him for that, and you hate me for it. So you punish him and you punish me, with heartache and mental pain. When will it stop?
It doesn’t stop. Time only hides it, and it not only haunts you for the rest of your life, it makes you angry and mean, bitter, distrustful of the world and of human relationship. I am quoting human psychology. You only know your gut-level reaction. Can you grow up a little, Sandiya, Sundar? Can you meet the needs of your child over your own?
Let us have a first meeting, the boy and I, our own private greeting, and then we go from there. It’s the human thing to do. Do I need to ask if you are human? Okay please let us begin, at the Mother’s balcony. Lidya can bring him. We can talk a few minutes in privacy, and I can show him his new YouTube video, and then she can bring him back. Then we go from there, like I said, in heartbeats Nithish.
Pardon the Tamil. I used Google Translate நித்திஷின் கேள்வி
நிதிஷ் சார்பில் இது ஐந்து நிமிடங்களுக்கு மேல் இருக்க வேண்டும், மற்றும் அம்மா இல்லை. இதில் என்ன தவறு? அது அவருக்கு சுவாசிக்க இடமளிக்கிறது. அவர் மீண்டும் தானே ஆக முடியும். அவன் பெற்றோருக்குக் கீழ்ப்படிய வேண்டியதில்லை. அவர் என்னை சுதந்திரமாகவும் வெளிப்படையாகவும் தெளிவாகவும் பார்க்க முடியும். அவர் என்ன வேண்டுமானாலும் என்னிடம் சொல்லலாம். யாருடைய குறுக்கீடும் இல்லாமல் நாம் ஒன்றாக இருக்க முடியும். நாங்கள் எங்கள் சிறப்பு உறவாக இருக்கலாம். நான் அவருக்கு விஷயங்களை விளக்க முடியும். அவர் எனக்கு விஷயங்களை விளக்க முடியும். அவர் என்னைப் பற்றி எப்படி உணருகிறார், நான் என்ன செய்ய வேண்டும் என்று அவர் எதிர்பார்க்கிறார். நாம் மீண்டும் ஒன்றாக இருக்கலாம்.
நீங்கள் முழு கட்டுப்பாட்டையும் தேடுகிறீர்கள் என்றால், நீங்கள் அதைப் பெற மாட்டீர்கள், சந்தியா மற்றும் சுந்தர். நீங்கள் சந்திக்காத தேவைகள் அவருக்கு உள்ளன. என்னை பார்க்க விடாமல் செய்ததில் நீங்கள் உங்கள் சொந்தத்தை மட்டுமே சந்திக்கிறீர்கள். அவரை விட உங்கள் தேவைகள் ஏன் மிகவும் முக்கியமானவை? நான் உன்னை இப்படியும் அதையும் சொல்லி மிரட்டினேன் என்று கோபித்துக் கொண்டாய். சந்தியா என்னை சிறையில் அடைக்க ஒரு போலீஸ்காரரை அழைத்து வந்தபோது நான் உண்மையிலேயே காயப்பட்டேன். நான் உங்கள் மீது எந்த வழக்கும் புகாரும் செய்யவில்லை. நான் நித்திஷைப் பார்க்க முயற்சித்தேன். ஏனென்றால் எனக்கு தெரியும் அவனுக்கும் நான் தேவை அதுபோல அவனுடைய வாழ்க்கையிலிருந்து என்னை நீக்கவும், நீ என் மீது கோபமாக இருந்ததால், மற்றும் எந்த தொடர்பும் வேண்டாம் இந்த சிறுவனை கொடூரமாக கொன்றான் அவரது இதயத்தை உடைத்து, அவன் மனதை கிழித்து, மேலும் சில சமயங்களில் அவர் இறந்துவிட்டதாக ஆசைப்பட வைத்தார். இந்த விஷயங்களை அவர் உங்களிடம் சொல்ல முடியாது. அந்த அளவு நம்பிக்கை அங்கு இல்லை. அவனை அடிக்காதே என்று உன்னை நம்ப முடியாது. அவனை திட்டி, அல்லது அவர் எப்படி நினைக்க வேண்டும் மற்றும் உணர வேண்டும் என்று சொல்லுங்கள். நீங்கள் அவர் பக்கம் இல்லை. நீங்கள் உங்கள் மீது இருக்கிறீர்கள்.
நான் இந்தக் குழந்தையின் பெற்றோர். சில சட்டப்பூர்வ காகிதம் அல்ல என்பதை உண்மை காட்டுகிறது. அது ஒன்றுமில்லை என்பது போல் நீங்கள் புறக்கணிக்கிறீர்கள். இந்த வீடியோக்களை பார்க்க நேரம் ஒதுக்குங்கள், நான் ஒரு மோசமான பெற்றோர் என்று சொல்லுங்கள் மேலும் அவருக்கு கொடுக்க என்னிடம் எதுவும் இல்லை அது அவரது எதிர்கால வாழ்க்கைக்கு மதிப்புமிக்கது. உங்களால் முடியாததை என்னால் அவருக்கு கொடுக்க முடியும். என்னால் முடியாததை நீங்கள் அவருக்குக் கொடுக்கலாம். இந்த பையனிடம் ஏன் இவ்வளவு சுயநலமாக இருக்கிறீர்கள்? நீ ஏன் அவனை இப்படி சொந்தமாக்க விரும்புகிறாய்? பெருமைக்குரிய விஷயமா? அவர் உங்களுடையவர், நீங்கள் அவரை விரும்புகிறீர்களா? நான் வெளிநாட்டவர் என்பதனாலா, நாம் அனைவரும் பிசாசுகளா? அல்லது அவர் என்னை மிகவும் நேசிப்பதாலா? அவர் உன்னை எவ்வளவு நேசிக்கிறார், மற்றும் உங்களால் தாங்க முடியவில்லையா? அவரது தேவைகள் பற்றி என்ன?
அதைத்தான் நான் இங்கே பேசுகிறேன், நான் சந்திப்பதை உங்களுக்குக் காட்டுகிறேன். அவனுடன் தனியாக நேரம் கேட்டேன். அதனால் என்ன வேண்டும் என்பதை அவரும் நானும் தீர்மானிக்க முடியும். அவர் உங்களை சிறையில் அடைத்துவிடுவார் என்று பயப்படுகிறீர்களா? அது எங்கள் நோக்கமோ நோக்கமோ அல்ல. நாங்கள் மீண்டும் ஒன்றாக இருக்க விரும்புகிறோம், மற்றும் நான் முதல் சந்திப்பைக் கேட்கிறேன் அது நடக்க அனுமதிக்க, மெதுவாக, மற்றும் அனைவரின் நல்லெண்ணத்துடன், அவர் விடைபெற வேண்டிய கட்டாயத்தில் இருக்கும் இறுதி சந்திப்பு அல்ல, மேலும் அவர் என்ன சொல்ல வேண்டும் என்று நீங்கள் அவரைத் தூண்டினீர்கள், நீங்கள் அங்கே அவரைக் காத்துக்கொண்டிருக்கிறீர்கள், அதனால் அவர் அதைச் சொல்வார். சரி தவறா என்று உறுதியாக அறிவீர்களா? நீங்கள் இங்கே சரியாக இருக்கவில்லை.
நித்திஷின் எதிர்காலத்தைப் பற்றி பேசலாம். நீங்கள் அவரது இதயத்தை உடைத்துவிட்டீர்கள், அவரது வாழ்க்கையில் மிக முக்கியமான நபர்களில் ஒருவரின் அன்பை நசுக்கினார், அவன் மனதை என்னை பற்றி தவறாக நினைக்க வைத்தது பொருள், அவர் ஒரு ஒழுக்கமான நபராக இருக்க வேண்டும் என்று நீங்கள் எதிர்பார்க்கிறீர்கள், நல்ல மனிதனா? காதலை கொன்றாய், நீங்கள் அவருடைய இரக்கத்தைக் கொன்றுவிட்டீர்கள், நீங்கள் அவருடைய இரக்கத்தைக் கொன்றுவிட்டீர்கள். அவன் என்ன மனிதனாக ஆவான்? ஒரு சராசரி மனிதன்.
இப்போது எப்படிப்பட்ட பையன்? அவர் சிதைந்துவிட்டாரா? அவர் எவ்வளவு எளிதாக ஆக்ரோஷமாக மாறுகிறார் அல்லது கோபமா? அவர் அடிக்கடி முரட்டுத்தனமாக இருக்கிறாரா? அவர் நிறைய அடைகாக்கிறாரா? தனக்குள்ளேயே தொலைந்து விடுகிறாரா? நிதீஷ் எங்கே போனார்? அவ்வளவு சரியான பையன் இல்லை நீங்கள் அவரை அழைத்துச் செல்வதற்கு முன்? அவர் சரியானவர் அல்ல, ஆனால் அவர் ஒரு நல்ல சிறு பையன், அன்பான மற்றும் புரிதல். இப்போது அனைத்து கெட்ட கூறுகளும் அவருக்குள் ஆக்கிரமித்துள்ளன, இல்லையா?
நீங்கள் ஒரு வித்தியாசத்தைப் பார்க்கிறீர்கள் என்று எனக்குத் தெரியும். அவருடைய எடையைப் பாருங்கள். சந்தியா இங்கேயும் வெளியில் விளையாடியதற்கு மன்னிக்கவும். நீங்கள் வீடியோக்களைப் பார்க்கலாம். அவர் எல்லா நேரமும் சும்மா உட்கார்ந்திருக்கவில்லை.
அப்படியானால் அந்த எடை எல்லாம் எங்கே போனது? அவர் உள்ளே மிகவும் மகிழ்ச்சியற்றவராக இருந்தார், உணர்ச்சிவசப்பட்டு, அவரது இதயத்தில் உடம்பு மற்றும் அவரது மனதில் மோசமாகி, நீங்கள் அவர் மீது வைத்திருக்கும் கட்டுப்பாடு, அவனை என்னிடமிருந்து விலக்கி வைக்க, ஒரு சிறுவன் தனது டீனேஜ் இறக்கைகளை அணிந்து கொண்டான், எந்த பையனையும் பைத்தியமாக்க போதும்.
ஏன் இப்படியெல்லாம் செய்கிறீர்கள் மீண்டும் கேட்கிறேன். அவர் ஏதாவது தவறு செய்தாரா? அவர் ஒரு வெளிநாட்டு மனிதனை காதலிக்கிறார் உங்கள் கையை விட அவரை உயர்த்த அந்த கையை விரும்புகிறது. அது அவருடைய பெரிய பாவம். அவனுக்கு நீ வேண்டும் அவனுக்கு நான் வேண்டும் ஆனால் நான் கொடுக்கும் வீட்டை அவர் விரும்புகிறார். உங்கள் கோபத்தின் ஆன்மாவை நாங்கள் தாக்கியுள்ளோம் என்று நினைக்கிறேன். அதற்காக நீங்கள் அவர் மீது கோபமாக இருக்கிறீர்கள், அதற்காக நீங்கள் என்னை வெறுக்கிறீர்கள். எனவே நீங்கள் அவரை தண்டிக்கிறீர்கள், என்னையும் தண்டிக்கிறீர்கள். இதய வலி மற்றும் மன வலியுடன். அது எப்போது நிறுத்தப்படும்?
அது நிற்காது. காலம் அதை மட்டும் மறைக்கிறது அது உங்கள் வாழ்நாள் முழுவதும் உங்களைத் துன்புறுத்துவது மட்டுமல்ல, இது உங்களை கோபமாகவும், அர்த்தமாகவும் ஆக்குகிறது கசப்பான, உலகின் மீது அவநம்பிக்கை மற்றும் மனித உறவு. நான் மனித உளவியலை மேற்கோள் காட்டுகிறேன். உங்கள் குடல் நிலை எதிர்வினை மட்டுமே உங்களுக்குத் தெரியும். கொஞ்சம் வளர முடியுமா, சந்தியா, சுந்தர்? உங்கள் குழந்தையின் தேவைகளைப் பூர்த்தி செய்ய முடியுமா? உங்கள் சொந்த மேல்?
முதல் சந்திப்பை நடத்துவோம், பையனும் நானும், எங்கள் சொந்த தனிப்பட்ட வாழ்த்துக்கள், பின்னர் நாங்கள் அங்கிருந்து செல்கிறோம். இது மனித காரியம். நீங்கள் மனிதரா என்று நான் கேட்க வேண்டுமா? சரி தயவு செய்து ஆரம்பிக்கலாம், அம்மாவின் பால்கனியில். லித்யா அவனை அழைத்து வரலாம். சில நிமிடங்கள் பேசலாம் தனியுரிமையில், அவருடைய புதிய யூடியூப் வீடியோவை என்னால் அவருக்குக் காட்ட முடியும், பின்னர் அவள் அவனை திரும்ப அழைத்து வரலாம். பின்னர் நாங்கள் அங்கிருந்து செல்கிறோம், நான் கூறியது போல, இதயத் துடிப்பில் நித்திஷ்.
Get her to speak with me. Ger her to understand her fear of losing Nithish makes her abuse Nithish. She says she’s stopped beating him? It’s not a conscious choice she makes. She gets angry and loses control of herself and beats him. It’s her character. He will tell that.
Now, about abuse: she will not let him see me, even for a short visit, so to abuse him for preferring me over her. Yes momma I’m happy with you. What he’s really saying: yes momma I’m scared of you. Why won’t he mention daddy? Why won’t he fight for the right to see daddy?
I cannot speak of him in front of you, and I’m on his side. You don’t understand I cannot speak. The fear of you is so big inside, the fear of you mother, who has beat me, slapped me, brainwashed me for these past two months, so much so I cannot even speak, physically cannot speak, on daddy’s side in front of you. I am too scared of you.
Now Sandiya is this my muse talking or is this Nithish? Are you hiding from yourself the truth? Nithish loves you but prefers to be with me. Nithish is happy with me. He is not very happy with you. Nithish wants to live with me and visit you. These things are facts in that boy’s mind and heart, and stop lying to yourself about it. He feels that way.
When you make him speak against his will, you smother his identity and abuse him. Abuse is more than the hit of a hand or the handle of a genital. It’s forcing that child to do things against his will. It’s suppressing him own identity. It’s not letting him be who he is. It’s making him be who you want him to be. You are so self-satisfied, so sure you have his loyalty, but when you kept him from even greeting me, after two months of such emotional torment, his and mine, you crossed the line. He will tell on you now. Wait and see.
But why does it have to come to that? Can you just put a stop to your hate and desire for revenge? Can you consider the welfare of your child more than you needing your child? Can you do what’s best for Nithish? You know that is seeing and being with me. It doesn’t mean he’s not with you. It just means your fantasy that he’s your baby is not true. He’s his own self and is too big to be someone’s baby. I am a man, and at his age, he identifies with more with males.
His father has been a weekend dad all his life. I have been with that boy hundreds of days more than his father, and whatever you say about the boys I’ve raised, Sundar is a murderer. He has killed at least four people my advocate told me. What a role model for Nithish, and now he’s using his gang to threaten Asiya, to beat him up or even kill him, and you yourself Sandiya are giving that threat. What business is this for good parents? That is evil and you know it. Asiya did not hurt you, did not give you heart pain or grief, only helped me to ease mine, to do the right thing and help Nithish and I see each other, and you know that is good and proper in God’s eyes.
Can I show you a hidden example? A mutual friend Sudhan, you gave him a story to give to me. Call up daddy. Tell him you went in my house for a drink of water. Nithish was there alone. Tell him you asked Nithish about daddy. Nithish said I only love my mother, and I don’t care about anything else, a blatant big lie, a spinning web of psychological manipulation. Now Sudhan told me you had him do this to me. Imagine what you are doing to Nithish. This is just one example. When this is over, people will come forward with more. You’re being evil Sandiya, just evil.
You are willfully being bad, as bad as you can to me, for reasons I don’t clearly understand. You would kill me if you could get away with it. That’s how much you hate me. Is it at bottom really because Nithish prefers me to you? Is that the reason for all this hate?
Now pull him up on the carpet. Ask him to reassure you again how much he loves you. How many times have you done that? Do you chose me over daddy, do you chose me over daddy, do you chose me over daddy? He’s very afraid of you. He will tell you whatever you want to hear, because he’s scared of you, not because he loves you. You say if he spent time with me away from you he would change his mind. What does that mean? He would realize how he truly feels, and you are scared of that? You are not secure in his loyalty to you, are you?
In the eyes of God, please, allow Nithish and I to see each other without your interference, just for a short time the first time. Then we can go from there, and we can make peace again in our family for the children’s sake. It’s up to you Sandiya. It’s your decision. You hold the power for now. Will you do what’s right?
Hear a dog’s life. We question Nithish. He’s on the short end of the stick at home, the author of all these Facebook problems. He’s in trouble. He suffers so much for loving me. His mother ruins him for it. What can I do but cry?
Okay I have the strength of poetry, and I’m using it for Nithish. You think I’m stupid, a fool, just some crazy old man? I love my boy, and if it comes to that I will lay down my life for him to get him the help he needs.
He’s lost so much weight. He looks hollow and empty inside by the look on his face. I hear his behavior is erratic. He’s volatile and tells lots of lies. He’s not sure of himself. A personality change has occurred since he was taken from my home a happy and plump little boy. The mother is ignoring this, his state, his rapid deterioration.
To anyone that confronts her about letting the boy see me, she’s flies off the handle and screams at them to stay out of it, even to close relatives. That’s the mother he has. Now that’s Sandiya. Can you please help?
What happened at your advocate's office? He was threatened, when you came alive he was threatened. He had to obey his mother. Is that the real card? You thwarted her. You put yourself there not the mission. It was all your fault, never mind her cruelty.
Why do you allow her that? Why does she have all the power? You’re not being fair, and it has never changed, and I got no help there. So blame it on me, but You could’ve helped. You could’ve done something.
Why die? Because I’m lost him, and I cannot live without him, and it’s the betrayal of the universe, the betrayal of God. There’s a spider there. She believes it, does not see how inhuman she has become.
To not even allow you to embrace after all that pain, two solid months of grief? She kept him behind her and even put her hand over his face so you could not see each other when he tried to look at you from behind her. No one will show her cruelty to her. We just want you to feel certain effects, and We allow this.
Yesterday was your tragic happening, and you did that tragically. The list’s off the end. I know to pleasure that, so I know I’ve done the right thing. There is no possibility. There is no possibility. There is no possibility. He’s deleted everything except the system delete. Go in the freezer please.
Open your account. You’re a fish. You’ve got to give maybe. He needs your care and attention. This number’s strong. Please try later.
This is the stage of real power. This is the lonely winter stage. It’s about who’s going to the stationary shop and buying him metals and honor. I can do that. No, no, my hair’s growing. Lydia will fight me for it. I’m not concerned with that. I’m concerned with your future.
People this is imaginary pool. He hasn’t told me these things in the outer world. I look at him in spiritual vision, and I hear him tell me things. Lydia I think you’ve punished him for that. You have a primitive mindset, all of you, and you don’t understand the power of poetry. I have restored everything to show you. These poems here might be valued long after you are gone.
What that boy is is a poet, to a degree that most childs aren’t. Here is a poem that speaks of the future. It’s talking directly about Sandiya taking Nithish from me, and the way that we find peace from that, how to do it. It is written in poetic symbols. You will only recognize the last line as him talking about what’s going on today.
Read this poem and tell me he has no future here; this is the stupid babbling of a child; this does not show that he has any talent whatsoever; this is just a piece of garbage.
The argument I am having with his mother and father is over his future. I can give him American citizenship, a U.S. passport to travel the world, a university education in America if he so choose. I will not shove school down his throat.
I also give to him the status of a poet, not his future self, the child Nithish today. What is a poet? A person all honor and hold in high esteem. They write the culture and give it direction and meaning. They hold out their hand and presidents and prime ministers kiss it. They are the special meaning the world awaits with honor.
I give that to Nithish. His parents can’t. They are concerned with possession, rules, and school. I have his department. I not only know what he wants. I can give it to him. They know now he loves me, wants to be with me and has this whole time. They punish him and punish him now simply because he loves me. That is not fair. That is not right, and I’m sorry you have to see this, two parents doing this to their child, from waves of jealousy and hatred of the foreigner. Here I am, and here is his poem take us to the future.
Paradise Things With Lyrics by S. Nithish
Reach for peace, but it’s a long jump away. It’s One stairs. Butterflies are our airplanes. They’re peaceful and calm. They can fly us to space. From there we need to walk.
There’s a place for everybody in the world. I did two steps: let the Light be the guide; my place is out of this world. We all have something that we should pass on. I do not have a turnoff button.
The ancient minds were better. They left out clues for us. They left out clues around the world. We should always say thanks. Stars were meant to be together.
This is a photo of Nithish my advocate took at his office last night, May 7. He has lost so much weight, the hollow look on his face and in his eyes I cannot stop crying over. He did not look like this when his mother took him from my house.
I am very embarrassed to explain, but I lost control of my emotions in a meeting with the mother and the boy and my advocate. When she entered, she kept the boy behind her, using her hand to put over his face so he could not see me. I went behind him and put my hands on his head, and she quickly maneuvered so that I couldn’t touch him. There had been a second, when he was on the stars behind his mother, that he gave a week smile, but after that he pretended I was not even there.
The mother, boy, and the advocate went to the office, and I stood near the door, until they shut it. I could hear the boy crying and then the advocate shouting at him. Then I and my grown son was called into the office. I just looked at Nithish, who was trying to pretend I wasn’t there. I could not take that, and I began asking him to please speak to me, say anything but say something, and he would not. I asked him is he loved me, and he gave a weak yes, and then I began asking him about his mother hitting him with a flat board, what he had told to me to begin by in a phone conversation the very night before. He nodded a weak yes, that the advocate saw but not the mother, and when she turned her head to look at him, he stopped assenting. I told him that he had told me to do that, and he would speak, and he nodded his head again, and when the mother looked, he stopped.
I had pulled out my phone in the beginning of the meeting, and my advocate told me not to make a video. But then I saw the mother holding her phone like she was making one, and I knocked it out of her hands across the room. Then She took Nithish by the arm to leave, but I blocked her, telling the advocate that he saw the boy’s being abused and brainwashed, and I asked him to call child welfare. He refused. He physically took a hold of me and began moving me out of the office so the mother could leave with the boy, in a way that I could have to contact, even be near him. I was trying my best to keep her from taking him out of that office. I failed, and they left, and then I was severely dressed down for my actions by the advocate, asking me if I wanted to go to jail, and I was told once again, that in India, you can do anything about child abuse, not matter if it’s illegal or not.
I tried to explain that I am not India, am an emotional American, and that for two months I had been in severe emotional distress, getting calls from my boy to help him, and here I just could not not hug him or greet him, how impossible that was for me. I had to get him to speak to me.
So, it’s now over, and I am returning to America in the fastest possible way. I have to get away from this pain that boy giving it to me. If he won’t help, then I can do nothing for him. I’m sorry. I did my very best, and no one out there would help either. I never even got a single comment for support in any of these posts describing this tragic situation.
This is an audio recording of a telephone conversation between Nithish and I on April 20th, where he’s had to sneak to call me, where discovery is near, and we both are very upset and frustrated. Please pardon us, we are doing the best that we can.
Central to understanding the poem below is not only the above recording, but also a recorded telephone conversation in Tamil between the parents, Nithish, and my oldest (unofficially adopted) son, who’s 30. In the conversation Nithish is made to speak against his will. He’s frightened and not himself. We had gotten a local police station to do a meditation with the mother. She came, and my advocate, my grown son, two cops, and I had a very intense discussion with her, and after we left, she brought Nithish and had him tell the cops that if he saw me on the street he would not speak to me, and that he did not want to visit his former home here at the lake.
They did not speak to him away from his mother as they told us they would do, and we were not told of any other questions that they asked him, as it’s obvious he did not just sit down and tell them that. I’ve discovered that they began by asking him if he loved me, and he said yes, and if he were happy with me, and he said yes, and if I ‘bothered’ him, and he said I did not sexually abuse him, knowing what the cop meant. I cannot tell you how I know he was also asked these things, but I know he was.
Then, in the phone conversation I’m describing, which took place last night at midnight, he was made to say he was happy with his mother and did not ever want to see me again, and that her taking him out late at night to allow him to drive the bike and buy him ice cream the first few nights after he was taking from my house was what he asked her to do, even though she never did this with him before taking him from me, not one single time. Lydia, his auntie, his mother’s sister, had told me she did this immediately after taking him from me, and she asked her sister what she was doing, and the mother replied he felt bad, and she was making him feel better.
The other day, I found out it was because he was crying for me, and I told Lydia this the day before the phone conversation I’m describing. She obviously told Sandiya, and so Sandiya is trying to cover that base too. That his mother is even having him saying this just shows how sick she is being with her son. In all he says on the phone, which is less than a minute in the conversation, it’s obvious he’s being forced to say it and doesn’t want to. Even if you don’t know Tamil, when you hear the kid speak, you know he’s being made to lie. I give you this background so you can understand the poem below and the tragic position the boy is now in.
Douglas, I’m flatten for a reason. I have evidence I need daddy. Something’s wrong with me only he can fix. Please daddy believe me. You’re accused in the yard. Come back to me now in front of your parents or else this may not end well.
Where do we put Lydia? In the phone conversation, and don’t trust Lydia. Bad talking to her. Trust Nithish on the phone. That’s his real voice, when he’s speaking to me in a private conversation, not the prompted speech. Going to the station, did Nithish make a complaint against me? They didn’t explain any class action suit. It doesn’t surprise me. It’s not gonna court. He loves me, and that’s not what they wanna hear.
All this money, who raped him? Who raped him? A voice recording you mentioned in class and the muse in a poem. That’s prompted all this drama. Tell me, what did Nithish say? They’re not stupid. They can get in trouble. They can get in trouble for mentioning things. There’s scared of what he said, Nithish.
When I’m on the phone with him, it wasn’t to take him to a liquor store. He’s giving me plans on how to get him out of there, out from under the control of his parents, who’ve done devious things to him. I tell him my plans, and we renew our bond, so glad to hear each other’s voice. What’s the Mr. Mystery here? That the boy calls me at all. His parents don’t want to believe that, but of course they know it’s true. What does it mean to them? They are forcing him to say things against his will in anything concerning me. He is afraid to tell them his true feelings because he’s terrified at what they might do to him. Can we get an arraignment here?
I was called last night and given a voice recording of Sandiya and Sundar forcing the boy to tell lies that he knows are lies. I’ve been raising him since he was a small boy. Our relationship grew into that, but they made him say they let him live with me solely for the sake of school, that I would facilitate that.
And other thing, my advocate, Douglas, Mithun, Nithish, Sandiya, Sundar, and I, sat down here at the lake and had a talk near on seven months ago. We wanted him here during the week, with his parents on the weekends, and we wanted to home school him. I mentioned to his mother death threats and abuse that had been going on, that she and Sundar had been doing to Nithish. She immediately capitulated and said the schedule would go back to him with me during the week, and with them on the weekends, but not home school him.
On the phone the boy was made to say he spent the weekdays with me solely to help him prepare for his final exams. These people are grasping for straws, change their story every time you turn around. Sandiya was saying, before this, she took Nithish from me because I took him out of school, because I had turned him against school, because I was a bad influence on him in regards to school, and I kept brainwashing him that he had dyslexia. What happened to that story?
Sandiya and Sundar you are a piece of cake. You’re not intelligent enough to muster a good defense for taking Nithish from me. We go back to a child sex video the mother had made of her son Mithrin, three. It was all in fun she said, play, no sexual intentions behind it, although it’s child porn on any scale you look at, explicit child porn. What do you do with that?
In a conversation with the mother and my advocate, I didn’t want the scheduled changed, and Nithish comes to me only one day a week. I do not trust those parents. I do not think they’re good parents, but I was not keeping Nithish from them. I wanted the schedule to remain the way it was. I had him four days. They had him three. I had him on the weekdays. They had him on the weekends. In the conversation I mentioned the video, did not say one word about it except Nithish had given it to me and had told me about his father doing the nature of the video with his little brothers. I wanted to point out that’s bad parenting. I wanted to say I didn’t want Nithish exposed to that, but I did not get the chance to speak. On mentioning the video, and her realizing what I was mentioning, she began screaming “Get out of my house! Get out of my family!” And she would take Nithish from me, which she did at my house on the farm about 45 minutes later. That was the reason she took ‘im. She thinks I was blackmailing her. We have her recorded in phone conversations saying that over and over. Now what do you do with that? You call a spade a spade.
Listen to me Sandiya and Sundar, I’m going to protect that boy. Your lies, your subterfuge, will not get in the way. You are not good to him. You are not good for him. He was publicly humiliated in his chair, and life, the feeling of life, you took from him. He is on the verge of a mental breakdown. You have split him in two. His one person with me and another person with you. You’re too primitive to realize that.
Now here’s the cat in the hat. I’ve been with that boy most of his life, and he has loved me dearly. That’s been public view. Oh amma and appa I never wanna see him again, what does it sound like? Brainwashing. Oh amma and appa of course I want to see him. I just wanna live with you and just see him sometimes, but I have loved this man for so many years. Of course I’d like to see him. Do you see the Hitler here, the Nazi brainwashing technique? Never wanna see me again? That’s not normal, after such a close bond for so many years.
Can I introduce you to parental alienation in this classic brainwashing technique? The parents are just being primitive, cavemanish. They don’t know they fill a type. This is happening all over the globe to children everywhere, parental alienation, Nazi in its underpinnings. Now here you can see it plain as day. What are you gonna do about it? Put a like at my machine? We need some real help. but first we need you to see this little boy’s in big trouble, psychologically, can’t you see?
I love you Nithish. We need to reach peace, and it’s been a long jump away. The message is You have so show your parents you love me and want to see me. There is no other way. The divine will not help until you do. You have to be bigger than your parents. You have to come out of primitive humanity. You are in the world to make a difference in the world, not to enjoy nice food and pleasures, like they’re the reason you live. You’re in a tomb Nithish, and you need to come back from the dead. You need to confront yourself. You need to be Nithish, unified and singular, the boy that you are, not a boy with two personalities you have been in this custody dispute. That’s dangerous.
That’s psychological trauma. I do not want to get you in trouble, but you have to be yourself Nithish, and I give the recording for that. Don’t blind it. It’s a zombie test. Your witness. Admit I mean something to you, and I’m an important person in your life. Stop lying about that because you’re scared of your parents. You are dangerously close to big mental problems. I’m the one who heals you Nithish, but you know that don’t you? And that’s why you’re reachin’ out. Now we can all stand erect when that trauma’s been put out. Do you get me baby dog? That’s the unit no strings attached, a true healing measure. You’ve got your record.
Dreams of a lifetime are not in your corner now Nithish. They have been removed from your seeing by your parents’ insistence on me being taken completely out of your life. I put the video for that reason, for your future Nithish. The advocacy is there. No, no I’m sorry, you asked me to put a man there to help you get out of there. He’s here my baby dog. Let’s listen to him. He’ll be there in a few minutes.
You can see the permission I get. Sandiya, Lydia, what rendezvous point? I have punishment for them. No they will not be beat with a stick. They will hear what they have done to your life. A doctor will tell them. There were three of us together. It’s me, you, and Douglas. Help me. Just a minute I’m pointing my post. I am not some stupid rule book out to get you. How’s he blues it? You may never talk to me again. You may renounce me. You may hate me, but love makes sacrifices, and I’m sacrificing for you Nithish.
You, me, and Douglas were a team. Can we go to America together? You think about that before you hate me forever more. I’m writing your best interests not mine. That’s what parents do. They give their children their life, even if it hurts them, even if they may never see their child again because of it. That’s parental love Nithish, and it’s where I find you in this poem.
You need help Nithish, and I’m showin’ people you need that in a love poem to you. Psychological damage, does anybody deny it? I love you so very much Nithish, even more than seeing you. I am only crying right now. What more can I say? I have hurt myself so much posting this poem. Would you please look my way?
Daddy’s afraid of Nithish. I grew up with this statement. I see the father in him wanting me to be safe at all costs, even where he loses me. Oh daddy I understand. Don’t be afraid. My parents have not killed my love for you, and they never will. I love you daddy. I wanna see you again.
It was a simple record come open when you know your child’s in danger. I’ve stood up for him. I’ve laid down my life. Is that parental love? No one will grant me that because I’m a foreigner and I love boys, what that used to mean before it was tainted. I gather you in the right way. I’m not a fiend, a monster, a smuck. I’m not an abuser of boys. That life has changed.
I love him in the meaning of that word, and there is no difference than the love God has for you and the love I have for this boy. Oh my God, the sacrifice of love.
I’m a helmet for him to protect him from this abuse, this psychological trauma that everyone’s ignoring that’s happening. I give you my all. I show you everything. I do not hold back. Will you please help my boy?
Why lift the boundaries? (vision with the line of a wave of birds, thousands of them, coming up from the ground and into the sky in one solid waterfall-like movement but going up. This happened as I was sitting on a park bench) To go through life together under the Sun. To be ourselves with other people, but ourselves alone too. To give that boy what he needs, and he needs an involved I love you son wrapped around me. To change the world. We’re not messin’ around.
Now have we been put on hold, for the umpteenth time? Will I awake? Call me, senior advocate. Very closely nearly there. You better let me. I’ll delete everything, and you got your seer no more. What is it, a love reaction? You’ve betrayed the very essence of reality in my fundamental makeup, in my fundamental see, if we don’t come together, and I will know that the world is a fucked place we’re doomed.
And if we set ‘em sir, and if they’re not here, what is their placement? You can sit us in your organizing society, and we will show you where we rose. We’ll be here master plan.
I’m getting close I can’t stay yours. I’m a learning disability. Daddy do something about that girl. (vision with the line of a big man walking beside me with a black beetle in his mouth, and he was choking on it, and I was slapping his back to get it out) You’re dyslexic that’s okay. Your mother can’t punish that no more. I will take you with me, and you can be dyslexic in my school. I love you so very much. Next week, I promise.
Start happening! Start happening! I looked at it, [this line and the two above lines heard spoken in Nithish’s voice] and exactly as you said it happened. I want to know what your vision was. Momma laid her feet on me. All’s I could feel was our deep, undying love taking me to the lake. I will be there soon.
You will paint some rosy picture that I am to blame. I’m a Facebook mob. Oh I’m sorry, seven views. On WordPress there’s two. And Nithish, I see him now. His mother has replaced me, and he let her do it. The hugs, the kisses, the warm rubs, the excited talk about this and that, that woman who beat him has replaced me, and he’s happy with it. I can see the treatment. He’s a baby Sandiya told me on the phone. She’s gettin’ her juice. Before she would not even admit he was still a child.
Okay they go together. What am I still doing here? What the fuck, over? You have replaced all my lands. You have taken my very child and given that place I have with him to someone else, and they beat him and they slap him, and they lord it over his life. What more do you want from me? Why do I have to see that?
I have been betrayed in the sense of my stuff, by a little boy that took all of my heart and always wanted more. Where is release from this? He’s still won’t speak my name to his parents. Get that, won’t even say he wants to see me, the love of his life for all these years. What blackness is in the heart of children? What cruelty lurks behind their touch, wizziles with you in their face?
This is blind cruelty. The boy just wants to get by. To hell with me, as long as he gets his good food and bag of sweets and special treatment. He’s cast me aside, and I made so much noise, whenever he called, it forced him to call me and come out of his stupor face me a moment, come out of his animal bliss.
We’re dealing with a kid from the train yard. Whatever divine element in him, he has just gotten rid of. What do you do with such a kid? He will never speak up. He’s satisfied. He’s got his parents’ attention, and is the focus of so much love, even if it’s for his parents to have him and not for him. This operation sucks.
Do we rock that poem on Main Street and show it to the kid? I’m not happy with this boy. He’ll walk the room listening for phone calls, listening for Nithish. Man-managed plan develop on rainbows. Let’s look at that replacement line. Ruth, this is daddy. Now I’ll call you mother. There a step-mother sleeps. And you never got close to her, but you were dependent, a little child, and you had to look to someone to take care of you. She was mean. She was a monster, but you called her mother, and that was your choice.
You hated the relationship. You cried and cried. You really tried to please her, took her assessment of you as conscious fact, believed her when she came crashing down on you for just leaving your boats in the yard: you were a bad boy.
She saw you naked, washed your back in the tub. She combed your hair before school in the morning and fussed over your clothes, and you hated that woman. You were 10 and 11, no? She was just so mean to you. “Get up you little bastard it’s time for school.” “I know you like a book. You’re no good, and your father’s no good.” That really sucked.
The constant tirade coming out of her mouth she flushed at you, anytime you were in earshot, that did you in. You hid in the woods for hours, until your father came home, and he was no gentle lover. A stern man with whippin’s, that’s what he gave.
Now look at Nithish. He’s making the best of a bad situation. He’s being punished for loving you, and no one seems to notice that. In his heart it’s liberation towards you, like you felt towards your mother, only she didn’t want you back, was not on the edge of consciousness night and day trying to carry your pain. That boy has got you, and you’re all he’s got.
Can we mention this to the world at large? A boy has a man he’s loved all his life, who’s taken care of him more than his parents, and for that he has been so traumatized that he’s died inside. He’s still loves this man, and so much time his parents have spent to kill this in him. What the fuck, over? Are you listening to this? Can they do that? Just because he loves me he’s gone through so much punishment, gaslighting, brainwashing, and psychological torture: here boy, love this man? Let’s go to a fine restaurant. I’ll take you to a spa. Forget him, forget him, forget him.
But it doesn’t work, and the parents are frustrated. They don’t know their son. Okay we just ride this, let it be? The boy’s better off just doing his school work? I beg your pardon? You put a child through hell and say it’s for good grades in school? That’s his reason for living, why he can’t have this man? That’s an eight standard education talking, his mother’s. This man is a Classical Greek scholar, and knows dyslexia when he sees it.
Oh beanpoles, you will not get away with this. I’m comin’ for that boy, and I’m comin’ loud and clear, and I’m bringin’ the posse, and I’m bringin’ the cavalry, and if Indians don’t know matters of the heart, just say yeah beat the children, let them lick their parents’ spoon, Americans know better, and they’re on the way out of this, and that’s who I’ve employed.
Aerosmith, it’s Aerosmith to tell you that American thing, lights out on total control and ever remember your dreams. Got some Pink Floyd here. American music, there’s music there for the land Earth, and it sticks in your craw like a love song. You hear our anthem here. Won’t you buy a little American pie? We don’t doubt the man does. Are you afraid the boy does? And I’m not givin’ the lowdown on abuse. That’s magic in love, a parental man for his little son, a big boy for his best friend, a man and a boy who love each other. Hear it?
We gather you in poems, one after another. Can you speak that far? I don’t think you’re over the fence, one foot process from stuck in the craw to living school. You don’t know how. That’s saving grace, whether you know it or not. Come on let’s ballon, and let’s give this keeper his time shares. He’s keepin’ a boy safe from harm. You know his mother reads this, reluctantly, somehow, despite herself. We take her there. For the poems now. (vision with the line of someone offering two Rupees notes, one a large denomination and the other a bit smaller, but it was big money) I get paid in regard and help this little boy, not a baby in the room, not even a chair.
He’s been taken out of the picture by his mother, and no one can question him a thing about where his mother is taking him, if she’s not in the room. A boy of 12 see that, no will of his own, year there’s a civilization on record, mluv pomaleji prosím. (vision with the line of being on a bicycle and turning to my passenger behind me and saying that Czech phrase, putting my finger to my lips so to say be quiet). May I help you with that? Expressive of their will is expressive of their life. Don’t deny them that, and you’re off to the races. Don’t put down later. Pretty much give him to the public. Hey, what color of a shirt didn’t he didn’t wearing today? The color his parents choose for him. A raccoon was not a ground speaker, but he lifted up his head. The voice is in the room.
Is that what you want society, another person dependent upon society to be his mother? No will of his own, that blooms. He can’t find himself. He might even kill you, the manhood takes its stand. Robbed of his will right there where he becomes a man, just entering the body changes of adolescence. Can you say that? Just tell me what to do okay, that’s what we hear. Sure society, that’s what you want, a world of beggars please. Let’s study this room. See Nithish.
Okay Nithish, I forgive you son. It’s not your fault. You’re not to blame, and I will see you soon.
A heartbroken line. You just have to write this down. There is no Earth and Heaven but you. We glide here on our own devices. We can’t see the world around us. It’s blind to us too. We can’t even see our yard. There’s a process there. It’s image on sight. We have see things to believe in them. Our fingers have to touch their face. No other process allowed. That’s the ring around the rosie for us. It’s how we live.
It gets us in a lot of trouble. We can’t always see things. When people are away from us they’re gone. We imagine their existence, and it’s not real to us. They’re not there. Now tell me what to do? Go outside and see things, and try to transfer sight to some bigger picture happening before your eyes. Don’t just see your little world. It’s gotten big enough to swallow you whole. We gotta get outta here.
It eats us alive. It’s the only thing we know. Can you see this? Do you know what I’m talkin’ about? We are blind before our face. Our world is the world, and there is no other that has the reality of ours. We can put this in a movie or a sports field, or maybe even a good book. We feel something other than ourselves, but we’re involved in it. We’re still the center of the room. Look at YouTube Shots. They piece you to pieces, this show, and that show, and this show, and you have your favorites. Where are they taking you? They don’t know how to time. They don’t stop. You are lost there in the middle of you.
I’m tryin’ to get to some larger whole none of us see. We’re divided up in pieces, your world and my world and Larry’s world. Will we put our glasses on and see this? It really sucks you know when you lose someone. Say you had a kid and you’ve been raisin’ them since they were three. At 12 you lost them, and they were just taken from you for no other reason than just to take, ‘cause you made someone mad. Devastating.
It was a bubble relationship. We were the captain of our ship laughin’ at the world go by we teammates, best friends, together all the time. We were joined, and the world went by, and we were so special in it, so much comfort in each other, so much love. And then you lose that boy. No contact is allowed, and you watch that boy turn like he never knew you, and now he wants you gone. No, no, I didn’t abuse him. His parents did. He was broken whipped and spanked until he gave his parents what they wanted, the keys to himself. They can do that. They’re Indian parents. He was broken, lost his will, lost himself. They spanked him, and he cried and cried, and I had promised to save him and couldn’t come. That anger rides.
What are we left with? A quaking world. Death would seem a happy state, and I almost long to be there. I want my boy. I can’t take it. There is no escape from this pain. What do you do? You feel pain. You don’t know what to do. There’s no way out. Months ahead, the death of a child. There is no remedy for this. I’m lost in him, and oh the jesters of pain, that kid could care less if he sees me again, in just two short weeks.
Where do we go? To death? We have to do something. We have to live. We have to get up and live. You’ve been fucked by the universe, abandoned by your Gods. All soul’s failed, and you’ve got to find another life, and you really want the one you had. You’re stupid you tell yourself, a fool. Children are treacherous, and they only like pleasure and joyrides, and their heart can be bought with candy and cake, and they forget you, even when you were their whole world.
I’m dying in this pain, and I’m just showing it to you so you know of the reality of which I speak, in some little lost world forgotten from the whole. To cut him out of my heart is blind. That boy needs protected, and he’s in a bad situation. It’s an abusive situation. I cannot abandon him. I must go on tryin’ to free him, but the loss is too great to bear. You see the predicament.
It’s going somewhere. I am being perfected for him in parental ways, as he will need to be healed. If he returns, he will be healed with certain hands. I’m ready for him. There is just this need to swallow, this ever aching need that he fulfill my life, be its ornament, and meet my emotional needs. How can I get rid of this? Don’t look at me funny. You do it too with children. We are property lovers with them.
I don’t know how to do this, and that is my lesson now. It hurts. Where do I find you? In the lesson plan. I’m reaching out to you to be a lover with you, to put down that kid a minute, and let’s say hey look at this: we are fragmented world. Will you do the time with me? It might be a pickup truck that takes us all on a ride to higher skies. That’s where we think about larger things than ourselves and the contents and people of our little world. I’m pushin’ yah there in my own flagpole as I do this too. Will you sing with me?
Will we be together again? We come from afar. This is not our home. We’re on dangerous ground, where the Void meets Earth. There are doings here that have us all undone. We live out our lives little people, totally forgetting who we are together, the very next field above this one, the supramental field.
I’m ridin’ yah there, journeying myself. I don’t want to go. All my thoughts on little boy and what’s going on with him right now. Is he happy is he sad? Is he missing me? Would he like to see me again? Are they hurting him? This goes deep.
Alright I’ve told you some about what we don’t talk about: look there’s a whole; look there’s together again; look we are bigger than what we are. Have I reached out to you? I can’t see it. I don’t even know you’re there. I think that’s a reality kingpin. I’m alone in here in front of all of you, because of my perception. Can you figure it out?
That is put to the finish. Hey you got some things growing up there. Tunnel things this reality. It’s trustworthy. There’s no other way to see it. We’re not real, is that how far this goes? Do you see what I’m gettin’ at? Where is reality’s footing? Where do we place ourselves? In the center of attention? I think we look higher up. We look where it happens, where reality gets arranged, and we find ourselves there watching the arrangement. Isn’t that funny? Here I am.
Suffer the supramental solution. Sri Aurobindo wrote his letters just sittin’ there. He didn’t see the disciples, yet he knew they were there. He didn’t have to see them. He had concrete inner contact with them, and he knew what was goin’ on. He could see their own selves, and he knew what they needed.
This was just vision to him. No, this was the substance of his room. He grabbed the whole with his own hand. It was his messenger. He substance see’d, knew in relation to the whole, and he could see without errors. I cannot do that. I have strong inner vision. It doesn’t come everything’s true without errors. It gets a lot of lie, exaggeration, and endless possibilities worked out. I can’t see straight.
You don’t know how much this sucks. I’m glued to inner vision now to protect my kid and bring him back home, and it’s driving me crazy, all these scenarios played out one by one. He’s been hit with a dog. He’s been pissed on and raked over an open fire. This just kills me, and I don’t know what to do. The bad part is over, when they broke him to turn him from me. Now they’re tryin’ to act normal, and they want him to be happy.
Gaslighting is the order of the day. What’s a kid to do? Acquiesce and be what their parents want them to be, do what their parents want them to do, and say what their parents want them to say, and that’s what he’s doin’. and I can have no contact, and not a single person there will tell him of me. It’s inhuman. It’s a total blackout they’ve arranged. The abusers become his saviors, and his beloved grandpa a foreign devil tryin’ to take him from his family.
I was his main parent from the time he was six. Six years with me more than his parents, and they’re gaslighting him to make me some babysitter they mistakenly arranged. Okay public, what to do? I’ve shown you his card, a song he wrote himself when his parents were pullin and kicking him about school. This is where he is at. This is the boy on his own. Where do we find him? I hope that’s not the graveyard. Can you come and help me find him please? I really need you, and this is a live child waiting for your help. Can you help? Oh Puducherry, you couldn’t Aarthi.
Now there’s hope. The boy’s alive. How do I know he’s unsafe? His father’s a killer for a Lawspet gang with BJP connections, but he hasn’t killed in awhile. Says he’s done with it, but see the gold on him you’ll know he’s still involved, a gold ring on every finger like a pimp. He could kill that kid in a jealous fit of rage, and the mother’s of low character, and she may not prevent him. That's where this is headed. Don't be sorry. I’m calling on you now, Puducherry, rise up and protect that boy before anything else is done. Will you help me? Can you take this boy to safety? That’s wonderful. Thank you.
This is the boy’s address in Puducherry, India:
64 Nettu St. Kurusukuppam, Puducherry, 605012
The street is only a small alleyway accessible from Advocate Chinnathambi St. Fourth Cross. Go to Le Nid Apartments on Advocate Chinnathambi Street, stand facing the gates and turn right 90 degrees and you will see a little alleyway in front of you. Go down it and it immediately turns left and his house is the first door on the left. There is also an Ave Maria Kebi on the left side of the apartment gates.
Nithish’s school and he’s in 7th standard: New Modern Vidhya Mandir Higher Secondary School, 73/A, Pillayar Koil St, Angalamman Nagar, Muthialpet, Puducherry, 605003
His father lives in Chennai and has a business there and comes to Puducherry on the weekends. Here is his business address:
P. Sundaram S.S. Air Controls No. 432 Pachaivalliyamman Illam 29th St. 6th Sector K.K. Nagar, Chennai 600078
This is the address they spend the weekend at, usually from Saturday evening to Monday morning. It is his father’s parents’ house:
Harm's End 