Where autism rides,
nobody believes in it,
and the vehicles crash.
Madness in America gave us this lay:
autism comes from television
and screen time.
I laugh at every little thing. [sing line]
This is the public mind.
Where do we go with it?
We can’t take it anywhere
in the fundamentals of ourselves
where we’ve encountered the unknown.
I’m dancin’ on thin ice.
I think this is the public construction of our ego today,
or whatever you call that we are now,
how it’s made,
where it comes from.
Everybody’s ignorant here.
Nobody knows what’s goin’ on,
and nobody cares.
Too many other concerns crowd the show.
How do I introduce you to you?
Let’s take your dream last night
the closer you are from waking up,
when you’re patterning on dreamless sleep.
You’ve gotten down that far.
This is really weird.
The forms bite you.
They do not contain waking life
in anything recognizable
except maybe a sandwich you’re a part of,
that you’re being eaten by.
They are larger than machine.
They swallow you whole.
You were merged with that odd substance, weren’t you?
The separate self was hanging in thin air.
You didn’t recognize it yet.
You were the forms you saw,
and you are all mixed up.
You couldn’t tell yourself,
but you were there.
Have you ever woken up from this
merged dream content?
It’s oddly familiar.
You feel basic with it,
like you’re on a slab of reality
you’ve know before,
when you first woke up from sleep,
somewhere in womb-time,
but I think after we’re born the show begins,
when we hold the world tight
indistinguishable from it.
We are merged in our identity
with all around us,
but the body localizes us
in our surroundings,
and we are so bodily there.
Mommy and springtime,
that’s the season we wear.
Her face, her touch,
her smell,
we know those are safety measures,
and we don’t know much else.
It depends upon the daddy.
Some are right there,
and it doesn’t have to be a parent.
I can’t give you the lists
without breakin’ ‘em up.
We’ve got to talk about the thing.
I think slowly we wake to the blows of life,
its insistence on its kin,
and we separate ourselves from our environment
slowly,
little by little.
You can see this happenin’
if your look’s engaged.
That sense of separate self is precious
a wee one becomes a person in.
Are you three
when you’ve balanced life
and can give a wink to other people
here I am, here I am, how do you do? [sing line, popular nursery rhyme]
I’ve just studied your rabbit.
You think you’re localized in space
a separate consciousness in time.
No, that’s learned.
Now put all this in a TV show,
some stupid video,
and you see what you got.
I can’t distinguish myself from time and space
to begin with.
Now add another layer,
the absurd,
the inane,
the chocolate freeze cake,
and some children don’t make the match.
They can’t distinguish themselves in time,
and spectrum autism
makes them their relationship with the world.
One in 36 is it?
Anyway it’s huge.
I can babysit
a two-year-old,
and I don’t have consciousness breathin’ down my neck.
I make contact with the kid
casually.
I understand his price.
I see him there
pullin’ himself out of the world,
tryin’ to make himself work in it.
I dream about him,
have him in vision.
We have open lines of communication,
and I don’t wanna mess it up,
that delicate balance he has with the world
as he’s findin’ himself in it.
No extra touches when I wash his penis,
no emotions in my hand,
and I’m careful with that anus.
(I have no sexual desire for the child.)
I think these are where he is localized now
as the body reaches the sky,
right there at the birth of thought.
No they are not the majors in the room
that determine his life.
There’s just so much feeling there,
and feeling’s what it’s all about
when you’re two.
I’m crowdin’ in on your crash course in reality.
I’m tellin’ yah how it’s made,
our sexual preference,
our sexual alliance with the world.
We can become gay or straight,
pedophile or necrophiliac,
and the list goes on,
and we can this and that
or just someone who harass women,
touch them somewhere
they don’t know where it’s at,
respect,
and if you wanna rapist touch them more momma.
An old movie,
don’t worry;
I’m taking it to see daylight.
It won’t take long.
We need good parental hands
with everybody who handles them,
our genitals.
The equations will reach the sky
with anybody who touches them,
or squeezes them against ourself
in diaper rub.
Add some kissin’ on top of that,
real romantic feelings
with some male role model,
and if you’re boy you’re gay.
Watch and see.
I just let the cat out of the bag.
Can you see it?
Autism spectrum disorder,
it’s not the only thing that comes out of our threes.
Every touch counts.
Every moment’s involved with us.
A screaming parent,
two fighting parents,
and that’s joined in our identity don’t you see?
You got it all wrong.
Those years count the most,
and they’re the hardest to bear,
aren’t they?
Hit that child and see
you’ve got a child there
the world has slapped by,
and they’ve been betrayed by everybody.
Can’t you see it on their face?
Don’t you know it’s in their pain?
I love you Dylan.
I really do.
Anyway,
there, I’ve done it,
showed you reality.
Can you get my dig?
Cryin’ all the time, [sing line, from the song “Hound Dog”]
no.
We wipe their tears with our love,
always addin’ to the world
their place in it,
and the roles are clear,
and that’s heavy, ain’t it?
I can bring understanding
to many roles in your life
and to horrible times.
I can do that.
When you even begin to walk,
we’re gettin’ some stuff done.
We’re gettin’ some stuff done put well on you.
Like what can you do
if nobody wants to be well?
Kid you know
travel love,
and make that the aim of life
the immediacy of this moment.
May all your memories and all your steps,
may they be easy.
Okay,
I’ve tuned you to the ages.
That explains it,
what went wrong.
Daddy, daddy! [vision of Dylan standing and turning to look at me and saying this]
Come there
even for your own purpose.
You know as well as I know
the movies,
trauma is almost illegal I’m carrying
to bring Dylan through this touch and screen of madness,
someone
experiencing the world
his play bubba,
his romance,
his mastery,
and we all look for spiritual change,
don’t we?
Evolution,
it’s what’s you do with a kid.
It be like
huggin’
sha-la-la, la-la, la-la, la-la, la-la tee-da [sing line, song “Brown Eyed Girl”]
and never gettin’ caught in it.
You’re free.
Why would you want to take a child anywhere else?
Tag: sexual child abuse
Heavy Ethics for the Brain Matter

The constructuralist
my poem.
Do you know what I’m talkin’ about
pedo squad?
I’m lookin’ at you
in the German theater.
What they do with your mayor?
Did they fry ‘im?
He downloaded images of against the law
right there in the town square,
that one special crime
that kills everybody.
You know I’m talkin’ disease.
Do you know what?
You’re the infectors.
All of society is.
It’s a child’s jewels.
It brings up so much stuff in humanity.
You can’t get over it,
that they have them,
that they find pleasure there.
It’s the fundamental rule not to touch.
How did this come about?
Guarding secrets.
You feel nothing I am sure
seein’ a kid at the train station.
It disgusts you
what people do
with little Johnny’s toy.
You would rather they be shot,
the child I mean.
What am I sayin’?
Let’s go back in the history of children.
Prehistory,
caveman days,
I think it ruled society
eat that child’s lunch.
We couldn’t get out of bed for it.
I mean we could not evolve,
develop,
into let’s find ourselves there,
an ordered society
that did not eat itself.
Murder and mayhem
blinded us.
Do you know we came from there?
A child got woke
in a human animal band.
It was a woke party.
It was infant orgasm,
and give them some plant medicine.
The mother and parents were egged on
in dream and vision
from other spheres
to give us human consciousness,
raw form only;
development came later.
Did one person infect them all,
like in a reverse Planet of the Apes?
I don’t know maybe this was a garden,
and a whole tribe was involved.
I think we started in one place,
but the procedure could have been done anywhere
where the apeman was involved.
If this started us,
kids got eaten alive
for a million years.
Morality was born.
That’s the significance of the Jews in early history
and some other tribes
who got wiped out,
but we see their trees today.
You know the Gods came along
and employed circumcision
and moral rules
to reduce us from our children,
especially the male lead.
This is the child machine.
You know they are a leaven,
the people of the Jews,
but they were not the only ones.
I’m sorry;
do I count their sins too?
Do I count my sins too?
We stopped eating our children
as morality evolved.
You can see in primitive societies,
the non-technology ones,
a whole lot of touchin’ goin’ on
and histories of things got worse.
Now what do we do with it today?
Stomp it out like fire,
like every day.
I’ve taken you on a journey
into parental eves.
Get intimately close to a kid
in naked wares,
in that loving embrace,
the younger ones especially,
and you might wear desire a time or two
in the littleness of that child.
You’re not a pedophile.
You just hit intimacy
as it hits us,
and if you don’t believe what I’m talkin’ about,
get really into your dreams
where that kid shows up naked.
This is natural desire
that scares the hell outta you.
It makes you hate the pedophile.
It makes you hate him mean.
You can’t see this.
You don’t want to.
I can watch someone killed in a video all day,
and the makers go to jail I don’t.
What’s with child pornography?
I just told yah.
I can watch movies about killings,
all kinds of crimes.
I can look at horrible pictures
of anything I wanna see,
but see a picture of a naked kid,
increasingly,
not even hintin’ at sex,
and you’re liable to go to jail.
The armies we have to prevent it,
they’re poisoning humanity.
Prevent child abuse?
Everybody says it’s getting worse.
What are you doin’?
Ease up on those controls.
Go for the image makers.
Try to restrict access,
but don’t hang people for lookin’ at it.
You’re going overboard,
like you do
when you’re reactin’ to unconscious process.
Can I show it here?
I just did.
A Shoulder in Immensity

I wanted to die.
Everybody knows how to die.
Sufferin’ from panic disorder
my only friend.
I have no comfort in anyone,
and this woe is me will not say it properly.
I cannot believe
I have no worth to anyone.
I’m just a field of crap,
and I have seen God’s eyes,
feel the world’s pain like my own.
I sit in a height of thought
where almost no footing is.
I’ve taken you there
in our thought realms unawares.
The All-Negating Absolute has me by the throat,
and even God is buried in immensity.
I cannot discover God one last time
as who we need in immensity.
3:33,
28-years-old,
I can’t give God the proper numbers.
He is too right and wrong.
Mexican,
He took my pants off and raped me at seven.
It hurt too much to tell anybody.
I was cleaved.
Why am I telling you this?
Afraid to tell anybody,
I put back action
comin’ up in the rear.
Squealin’ inside me,
they crossed death too
a courier
of the same disease,
those little tummies.
I can’t give you molten lava
and expect you to cherish me.
I can’t even say my name.
I’m a brick in a wall
that you don’t identify with,
bricks in the same wall.
Up here,
I’m a way
to photography that wall,
to hold it out open to daylight.
I’m a measure of that peace,
but you can’t come to terms with me.
I’ve sinned to much for God cares,
or I remind you of sin.
I’m an enigma with an open door.
God the carnage at Troy,
sit back everybody
and tell me what hero came home.
The canonical field of Troy.
Do it again,
I stand before you now.
Will you hear me?
We swim in oceans of blood.
Don’t underestimate
life.
There’s a moment
before you
when you can give it to the challenge
it tasks a man with,
and he must stand alone in immensity
and be the voice no one wants to hear
turning every ear on
to a future in ideas
that will save us all
come that future,
whether I’m the voice that says them or not.
See me today
sittin' with you holdin’ your hand
likewise tell me
the world has turned its back to you too.
A pencil in agony,
it’s too early to tell,
and I’m a measure of that immensity.
So brothers and sisters,
I’d help you.
Those tummies are in good hands.
You cannot electrify them like that,
put them on lurch
little boys and little girls.
A needle in a haystack
give you a tap.
Raise Supermind,
I’d be one in the world.
Get ‘im a chair
to latch from our very disease
and bring us all to peace.
You know how it works:
no ignoring you
world enigma.
My OMs are here.
My front door’s open.
Enjoy a body of ideas.
Do it again,
I’m really intercepting your thought.
Grab That Child!
Come check your bag out
through his porch.
A porch
explore us,
the name of the explicit program,
miles
above the current thought,
miles above the existing program.
Sit by the door.
You went there.
I offer you
holy ground.
Insert
I mean the new superman,
a new way to Supermind.
My goodness you’ve gone over the top.
We got a new thing goin’.
You’ve got a brand new pair of shoes.
He’s all mad at yah,
Sonny—
I’m not sure all the time.
Who else?
I’m not sure about Nithish.
Lookin’ at yah.
Can we get better at ‘im?
Door to shopping
opens in a little while.
He’s your prime target.
A dark smear
settles keeps him in a corner.
I gotta do everything
to get him out of vice.
These are my papers,
and that’s what I’m workin’ on.
A kid gets killed,
and we’re in the front lines
normalizin’ it.
I don’t think we understand the history of science.
Our very lives show this to us,
but we can’t see it:
the whole society ruins children.
It’s a combat zone:
fuck you do your homework.
We lay them in bed
a manage them to sleep:
oh I’m eager to get out of there you clingin’ thing.
Or you test them in their underwear with your dick fingers,
rubbin’ butts.
Either way,
you can’t get the story straight:
you believe with them
there’s so much more than dresser drawers in the room.
Angels glow all along the edges of their minds,
monsters dwell.
They can see them in the corner,
hear them in the closet.
You think their imagination wild.
You don’t know what’s goin’ on.
If you did you’d run out of the room screamin’.
Your sanity couldn’t take it.
But let’s get back to business, shall we?
Kids glow.
They have otherworldliness to them
we’ve forgotten about.
They live there.
We see the form,
forget the consciousness inside.
They’re lust to us
or dreadful things we have to manage,
and in-between those two poles most lie.
Have I hit yah yet?
My boy is in a livin’ emergency,
and nobody cares.
I’ve shown this to the room.
I’ve shown this to Town Hall:
he suffers still.
We think there’s monsters there
in the love of this foreigner for this boy,
or we just want ‘im with his own kind.
Can you count that?
We don’t know children are kings and queens of livin’ life,
and they need more than us.
They need a breath of God on their tops,
and they need the substance of their souls
to be their playmate in time.
They need to get away from the Darkness in the world
and not give their little boy’s livelihood
to the darkness in the corner
goin’ bad in a hand basket.
We can’t see Hell edgin’ up upon their life.
Another soul down,
so many millions left to go
They say.
My boy’s there
turnin’ inta vice,
furious at his parents and the world
for making that child obey
and renounce his own freedom
and tear off of his lips and eyes
any mention of that foreigner,
who is me,
and they beat ‘im
until he complied.
Can I guess here?
I’ve seen it with my own eyes,
this tremblin’ little figure
afraid of his own shadow,
and I can do nothing to stop him
from being afraid,
his fear of the world,
late at night,
his fear of death.
I envelope him with my consciousness,
but that’s not enough.
That boy needs held.
You won’t let me do that,
satisfied he’s in his parents’ hands
for good or ill.
Oh the woes of parental not by blood,
but yah been there since he was born.
You only like adoption papers to make that real.
Can we be a kid again?
Can we see the emergency
that we have known with children all through human history
but have never seen?
Stop child abuse!
oh you stupid thing.
Stop you from hurting kids
by burying them in the world
and sealing that coffin with school
and other blind things
that have no reason why kids be.
You just wanna make them grow up
or be a football to play with.
You’re not inta their things,
their larger than life’s,
their Woodstock imagination,
and it didn’t rain.
I gave Nithish that glow,
what he wears himself
in his distance from time.
I let ‘em have it,
the freedom to take his kids’ reins
and mount the world with ‘em.
He loved it there—
no rules,
no spankings,
just guidance.
I yelled loudly I’m sorry
in moments I regret now.
He was just bein’ a kid,
testin’ limits and naughty.
Even the preacher cuss.
What do we do with children?
We let them have their head
in safety tips,
and we don’t vacuum their room
with a pain in the ass,
and we let them be stars
of our attention,
and punishment only makes them meaner
or more rebellious
when we’re not lookin’,
when they get out.
A submissive child is a dead child,
and they’ll bring dictators into the room
when they’re older.
See the world now?
Populist hell.
I let Nithish glow with his own feelings.
didn’t rob them,
and that was a school for me.
I gave him candy.
I took ‘im to the movies
in the middle of the night,
when he liked to go.
On the way home we played monster chasing us
or zombies in the middle of the road
reachin’ out for us.
I put reality there
by parkin’ my bike and runnin’ off
yellin’ eat the kid not me!
He would squeal with delight and belly laugh,
after his imagination let go of him,
the monster had returned to his lair,
the zombie apocalypse had ended.
I know how to manage a kid
with their own imagination.
It is prime time for them.
What is my purpose with him?
Oh I want that little boy happy
with himself now.
The adult can wait.
I want him to feel the breeze
of his own freshness
and what makes him so special
in a world where everybody’s the One.
I want him to love himself,
not be afraid of time,
but more than anything else
he has his own destiny
I want him to live for,
why his soul can down on Planet Earth.
That had nothing to do with small business.
I’m the upholder of his destiny,
and I like it there.
I’m his keeper,
because he’s still a child.
Why would jealousy pull him away from me
and you let them?
I’ll be back
the daddy he calls daddy
in just a little bit of room,
not much time as the crow flies.
Come on let’s go,
gimmie your will
so this can come.
Do you hear me stars
and all ye people you?
Bring the child.
The world is paper thin really.
Monsters glare.
Angels sing.
The world behind the world is bigger than the world.
You don’t see this?
Your kids do.
No let’s go over time.
It laughs to be alive
full metal jacket.
Children’s class,
there’s immediately a hole in the water.
It bites.
Writin’ kid once in you,
how far did that go?
You’re with Nithish.
Quite a ballgame.
I hope that’s my intestines tellin’ me I’m rush.
It was one on one flavor.
With no little boy here to share it with,
it was foreign.
Do you know the hole the world makes when you’ve lost your child?
It’s like infinity in the room.
You can’t understand its price.
It sucks.
I have to live there.
What do I do to get out of it?
I can’t do nothin’, my child can.
In the blackness of his state,
he has to get better.
He’s 12 goin’ on nine,
and there’s a football in the room.
He’s discovered pornography I hear
and sits there with his friends,
all hellions,
and has them corrupt him to land’s end.
He goes there to escape the wild,
a single room home where he’s stifled and crushed,
the invasion of his privacy a misdemeanor
the boy can’t afford,
the rule of his mother a felony
that makes him question his sanity.
She will not shut up.
She will not let him breathe.
The fear is he will see me,
and she took him for her vice not mine,
after a lifetime together
his end.
Insanely jealous,
she watches his every mood.
Is he thinking of me?
Has he called me on the phone?
These things are forbidden
and when she sees me on his face
she whips him for it.
His father’s a killer who only comes on the weekends,
and he’s plotting another murder
I kid you not.
These are the parents you chose him be with.
These are the parents you admire.
Can you get any worse?
I can’t handle this.
Protecting children I thought was your right and mood.
Turns out you only care if you touch their penis.
All else is permissible done to a child.
All else is warranted.
All else fails
to get your attention in any meaningful way that helps.
I live this,
your hypocrisy.
I only get your likes,
and damn few of those,
but let’s be patient here.
There is a poet I know in Israel that cares,
and not every reader is a penis-monger.
Some genuinely feel this,
but I’m courting people right now,
in the bowels of the situation,
who have the power to confront the parents
and at least end the blockade
of no outer contact
with the child I raised
since he was a wee little boy.
They’re Tamil and live here
in positions that can help.
Who says they do?
No, that’s online.
I am a foreign man and they are not.
They don’t give me the legitimacy of parenthood,
because how can I?
I’m not even Tamil,
and I cannot prove my worth
with my tears and broken heart and concern for my child.
I look like some guilt monster wanting to steal theirs,
so identify they do with Tamil people.
I can’t get around that.
You’d tell me to be quiet,
or end the attachment,
like it’s a perverted cross.
You should see his song
he wrote for me:
"all the bad voices are saying bye;
all the good voices are saying hi."
They say that loudly.
His whole life is on hold
waiting to see me again.
I’m daddy.
Can you gauge love in a boy’s heart.
Unexpressed it doesn’t die.
Ordered to kill it he don’t.
It grows beyond the mountaintops
and plays there with the Gods.
They have him arm and arm
with total control
to keep me out of his eyes and ears
and me off his lips,
because they are jealous of me there,
and in all this blackness more blackness comes.
In the absence of me
he races too see friends
they’ve gave him permission to be with,
who are the signposts to gangs,
boys already addicted to vice,
who are the real danger for him to be with.
His parents are oblivious to the boy’s plight.
They’re just controlling him from me.
This is bastardly sucks.
Let’s do away with it.
Let’s return this boy home
where his heart is.
Let’s give him the freedom to do that.
Okay crowd,
let’s have some high rollin’ here
and get that boy off the table and back to his house,
the American me.
It’s not fun.
Hey you two pass my way.
I’m not bein’ sarcastic.
I’m talkin’ to the two Tamils who can help.
See them there?
A will collective move on their will
and speed this process up.
They have the power.
They really do.
Come on people let’s ride.
I’m countin’ on Syria
to kick out Islamic State.
Can we get there?
I go over the mountain.
All I know,
judging from your path,
I think you’re right.
You keep raising your voice.
You’re grasping at straws to get him back.
You let me know
anywhere loaded on ‘im,
some trapdoor to sex.
My sympathies then,
and I’ll call child welfare there in India
and get him taken care of.
Okay choir,
would you settle for ruinin’ his life?
Oh my God chop me to pieces.
You’re comprised by sex
in Texas.
Do you know where the dropbox is?
You’re wonderful,
and another one’s kicked off the Earth,
no tongue.
Someone sent me a message.
I’m just gonna read part of it.
You take unborn babies and make them king,
but kids themselves you beat,
and punishing them is your right.
You want the submissive child.
You’re lookin’ beyond graves,
if we can,
beyond that boy has a penis but thinks he’s a girl.
You’re gonna take it seriously
kids need to be protected
from abuse.
Now “The Use of Animal Freedom”
really identifies with kids,
what’s about to turn on in Nithish full force.
the fact that he has a dick and wants to use it.
I can’t get you to see this in a children almost teen.
What do you do with their puberty,
make them wear church,
make them put a sock on it?
And if she’s a girl?
Is that the one
you need most
to no button down there?
Why of course ring maker.
Kids go to perdition so easily
when they’re buddin’.
Kill it,
kill it inside them,
their natural born feelin’.
Transgender wars hell,
you’re workin’ to make a warehouse of kids
to not even look down there
to check out what they got,
and you are so worried about them in the womb.
You’re so cross fingers with them in the womb,
but you pull their pants down and spank them
just for bein’ a kid.
Texas you’re the vice I’m talkin’ to.
Hey Texas leave those kids alone!
All they are is another brick in the wall?
I liked the sound better
with a mouse.
That’s great.
That’s not acceptin’.
Gotta get some lunch bags too.
Outgoin’ calls,
the hammer is no.
I’ll let you feel safe.
You’ve lost your mind.
You give kids no sexual expression at all,
and you think this rides their freeways.
It rides their hidden vice.
It used to be in your desk,
overcoming desires.
Did I hand it to yah?
Come on,
what do you needed to do it?
Looking at
come here Bruno,
come here! (vision of Bruno, our Doberman, running away from me to the front of the house, and I’ve just let him out the back door)
Get your pumpkin right.
Self-control, self-measure you teach them.
Fit there she goes to sleep.
You don’t give her any room to breathe
on her own paper.
You deny reality and with it the child.
You’re underage
a God looking in on Himself.
You put conservatives in the White House,
governor of the state,
with your kid’s vote,
and you stand around and watch children die.
Here he comes.
You’re too big
to get the world to see my child.
You know how it goes.
We murder children in their sleep
so they are zombies all life long.
A lot of this
good agency,
what I’m giving you now.
Follow their lead.
Even playing with themselves they’re bringing in a better world,
when it’s not porn-play
or adult hand in there.
Even thought about kicking themselves up,
they’re watching themselves up.
When we allow them to get dressed
in personal animal freedom,
the cops come,
depending upon who you are,
and ban everything.
Oh Texas
and my world,
you need Freedom School. [a school in the movie Billy Jack]
Hello napkin,
I wondered why I was burnin’ down there.
Such large members,
such a tiny space
we fit them into,
such a large package.
Oh my God world see this.
We go hand in hand
with proper sexual expression,
and that’s not with an adult,
and it’s not only with their own hand.
I just stepped off the world
and into a better science,
as I’ve just entered your living room,
and I must be polite and leave.
What the hell do you want?!
Thy peacemaker.
Give the kids their genitals,
how they are
when not one’s lookin’.
Let child know
they can control themselves
how they are around dog:
napkin,
grab that fucking napkin!
And you’ve situated one of the building blocks to peace on Earth.
I’m fresh and alive, aren’t I?
I study reality,
but I do not rank there.
So be it,
but I’ve just written into the ether
a better way of doing things,
a better Nithish brought home.
I’m on a rollercoaster can you feel it?
And I’m not there to make you scream.
I want the end of the world
that puts kids in prison boxes and sends them to school,
that puts chains around their necks and sends them to school,
that pits them against their own bodies.
Why do you wanna cut your dick off?
Don’t you see reality?
Talkin’ to a transgender kid,
made there
not by gender diaspora,
by no one accepting his genitals growing up
and givin’ them release.
When you slice your dick off,
sew up you’re vagina,
you’re not expressing need;
you’re all wrapped up in society’s handlin’ of your food,
and the table’s sexuality.
Did I just ruin my poem?
No, I just ended it.
You better run, run, run, run, run,
talkin’ ‘bout a revolution.
[two above lines heard sung by Tracy Chapman, “Revolution”]
Move through ideas the city of human unity,
why did you do that?
What did you just do?
What did I just do?
I gave you a whole nuther head on children.
I gave you a whole nuther head on sex.
Read this thing so you can copy it fast.
I met too many here Guests and Newcomers. [social divisions in Auroville, India]
You think the divine is divine labor
on which you source,
rules and how to get there.
It’s not that honey it’s more.
Rollin’ in agony upon the hills
you end up later.
Hey picked Asiya and the house is comin’ down.
You’re Indian.
What right do I have to speak?
I’ve been asking my fat emotional body this.
I know the score
between children and their parents,
what you do with a divine in the room.
I’ve got expert topics,
and I’m not afraid to use them.
This is all prewash.
If you’re candy was Disneyland,
what was I?
They would tell you if they’re at.
They would threaten.
I talked to ‘im.
It was on his computer.
He’s a down and under hope dispenser.
He makes virtue and art Hitler’s birthday.
Down at that office,
we’re gandin’ from abandoned puppy too.
You don’t know how to lift up the race,
but we don’t lead you astray.
You lift up the biggest name in evil too,
not to condone them,
to rectify them.
We’ve lots of him.
I don’t see him anymore.
I got my check balanced.
I’m rose in the room,
and it just took me away.
What Intelligence writes your stuff?
The one that makes the flower,
the one that sees Earth a testing ground for souls.
I’m supramentalizing.
There’s a harmony in my pen,
not law and order
or we make rules,
but I talk about the important stuff
and reel you in with it.
My God this is not enjoyable.
I gotta put rings around mountains:
man is,
you have to do it man.
Now my little boy’s gone.
I would almost boycott poetry but
that’s not the flavor of this writing:
hey Luna, come to yourself any discussion. [Luna Rottweiler]
I’m tryin’ to show you somethin:
we are not on Mars.
That was a habitable island destroyed
in such a long, orbiting time ago.
We’ll see how it goes with Earth.
We help you.
One of your favorite,
one of your favorite teams,
I’ve tried to photograph me close relationship
to understand principles and stars,
to go beyond them.
I’m divine heavy in your room.
I’m tryin’ to lift you up to see the sky
beyond Mind.
I don’t get to go until you do.
We are a connected lot,
but I been up there before.
To say it’s the writing on the bathroom door,
it’s not;
it’s just there.
I’m a field take,
and I’m tryin’ to get you out there to play
a roaring game of baseball
so we can sees each other,
put our guns down,
stop shooting people.
You don’t know the price in the room
for hating anybody,
even those who hate you,
and I’m workin’ with Nithish’s parents,
who refuse to even speak to me.
You’re the judgmental party.
For Nithish’s parents,
the hatred just comes out of the woodwork,
suddenly picked.
You’re almost there:
understand their stupidity
and don’t hate them for it.
Gwen, okay?
An almost businessman came up.
She hates me I’m her brother.
She may even read this poem,
someday.
I’ve been hurt by hate too.
I have this social stigma,
and I’m the most hated man in the crowd.
This stigma’s hated;
people don’t know me.
I’m wish I’m done
with speaking through alleyways in your hole,
but I do feel better doin’ divine will.
No one reads me yet,
or damn few.
The audience and his poet,
do you have to have one to have the other?
I did ninety pushups and sit-ups each day.
I’m exercising wholeness and healing.
Will you give me a hand?
We gotta see the wholes,
and it’s a together report card.
I really need help with my boy,
get him out of trouble
and onto victory lane.
All this dramatic poetry,
this is a bank.
I’m writin’ poetry for my boy
so he can sees himself
an inner poet.
I pass this onto him in the inner consciousness.
He gets it.
The help of Robin,
it can help
when David,
who puts landscapes together,
afforded my report.
Will they put you in jail?
Not your question among you.
You just unload this poet on a public conveyor belt.
Anyway I got room to grow
and so does he.
He’s a contact Earth named poetry.
Accessible
he would make me.
I love your
fine wine.
Okay let’s borrow mine
and get down to Earth poetry.
Believe your death you must navigate.
I was making a significant Boomer’s salad when I made this for you,
when I bear this for you.
Let’s see how fast he gets here,
once your will’s a ridin’ him home.
Yes, yes, it takes a long time
just to roll up your sleeve.
Gotten Aidia’s attention,
hopefully in wheelbarrows.
That’s a great poem.
Why thank you,
a fresh fish in a factory.
It’s got labels on it this time.
Great vehicles on Earth
the poets are.
The print out,
it’ll be cave free.
We’ll do it in the mornin’.
It’s the head of the whole thing.
How many wheels does a truck driver have?
A collection of poems published in India
in a book see.
I hope you see there.
Can you say large collection?
Even a little bit apart,
he’s been us with the whole time.
Is what facilities you may use.
Him coming home,
and he gets not that shit from me,
a bad policeman.
Three times as big
key presenter,
I asked the cinema to work it out in peace
number 9.
I wanna hold your hand. [line heard sung by the Beatles, line song title]
I’m expressing need.
You need to see this.
It don’t feel like something we just said
Auroville Press made real—
I’ve encountered basically
the tune of the ages.
I suppose
you lookin’ at ‘im,
the whole prophet of Auroville,
nine inch skin.
I am constantly created.
Only in summary is he wet behind the ears.
On Old Galveston Road
he went into the nature of Supermind.
Your heart in your ears,
your ears in your heart,
oh there you are. (vision of Nithish sitting on the floor one knee up, he running his hand through the bangs in his hair like he’s a bit frustrated)
He’s comin’ home soon.
I gave preference to The Silmarillion.
Gonna detail now the Samadhi. [holds the bodies of the Mother and Sri Aurobindo]
The Samadhi—
hey how’s it goin’?
Tryin’ to watch
he’ll come be here soon.
I love you,
my beloved
teacher and master in time.
Trapped his voice
on this recorder
as he measures time Sri Aurobindo
and thank you Mother.
I’m an anomaly.
I look at my boy and smile and look at God later,
and that’s where I put God’s eyes,
on my little boy lookin’ at me.
It’s so we kosher together
and have fun.
That’s how you manage time.
Let’s go down this road.
Look, there’s the really afraid.
You do not
boy blue darkness,
step over him,
in how you hold God.
You hold God in that boy.
He’s not your image of God.
I look into your little eyes,
speak the account
God has with me.
Did I say that correctly?
We’re on Earth,
and we’re here to stay.
God on Earth,
and we are Supermind,
the supramental manifestation managing its creation.
Did I blasphemy?
I gave you a measure of God
in the balance of His show.
God is always bigger than any robe He wears,
any riding car,
bigger than those little boy’s eyes,
and we’ve arrived at the end of the poem.
He’ll be home soon,
and thank you God,
down lower,
gettin’ inta those eyes.
In Dire Straits
This poem was sent to the editorial board of Renaissance (BharatShakti) of The Sri Aurobindo Society, who I’ve submitted poems to that use obscene language and present ideas people don’t like to talk about. It has been published by Edge of Humanity Magazine: https://edgeofhumanity.com/2024/11/11/harms-end-blog-by-donny-lee-duke-in-dire-straits/
We have that place where,
yep, you need to turn on that character light.
I would say he does not deserve the title respect
call him.
Thank you sadhak.
Nat started a story.
It was obscenity of being,
the crazy what’s up nails trauma
a bunch of us go through.
Are we on your calendar?
You’re nice and pretty.
Does that mean you’re good
in the sense of good to all of us?
We’ve got a world here in a tin can.
It hurts everybody.
You would not like a story that makes you mean.
Is that transformative?
Watch movies that’s all you see,
a blight of entertainment
“televised from the gulfs of Night” [from Savitri, an epic poem by Sri Aurobindo]
that tells stories
to pit you against one another,
to make your blood boil,
to let the demons in.
There isn’t a place on the planet it’s not
on your local TV.
This is what we’ve gotta get out of,
get back to our dream maker
as the one we watch and write.
Is that a perverted slam?
You would boil at the inner consciousness
because it pits you against your morality papers:
don’t say cuss words;
don’t mention sex;
don’t talk about getting your dick sucked when you were five
by your mother.
What have I just done?
I let the inner consciousness in
in language that grabs you and moves you,
that has the day on it,
that gives you a porn whereabouts
so many faces are into these days.
It hits you where you’re at
if you can’t tell right from wrong,
if you’re lost in all this sleaze.
We’re tryin’ to reach people not preach to them.
A dream comes out
from someone who suffered this
in the language that it felt like,
and the elect can’t take it
because they don’t know how to deal with it.
They’re into quotes of Sri Aurobindo and pictures of deity.
They look at spirituality as the cure
and not addressin’ what’s wrong
in the language that needs to.
Everybody just be nice.
Make your concentration daily
and let no wrong movements in.
Be cheerful and happy.
There’s no end to the advice
in spiritual seeking.
Let’s get down to the nitty-gritty of life.
Let’s use those quotes to solve problems.
The Mother and Sri Aurobindo are a wealth of that,
applied in ways you haven’t imagined yet,
because you’re religious and one-sided.
We need to heal,
so many of us.
You can’t imagine what it’s like
where hell has opened in humanity.
This is all over the globe,
terrible stories
that’ll make you cry
if you had your empathy on.
We need to heal the world first,
then spiritualize it,
and spirituality will be healing,
because that’s what it’s made for,
if it’s the soul involved.
You don’t know this.
Soul healing’s to you a preacher wrote.
It’s not test the limits of humanity
in making healing the order of the day.
This soul is wide and free.
You don’t know that either.
You look at the Gods of Overmind,
the lowest rung.
They’re moral and straight.
They have seen God in passing
one time maybe.
They are closest to us
in the ways of deity.
They make rules and regulations,
put experiments on vice
and get rid if it not heal it.
Our whole world is taken by Them.
It’s what we need to change
and bring a new order upon the Earth,
soul healing
in the dynamics of Supermind.
You don’t know how wide God is,
when it comes to the personal growth process of wholeness and healing. /
That’s been my path all along,
and it’s gotten acute where I show it to you,
all Sri Aurobindo’d.
What else can I do?
I’m his disciple
and a seer of his wisdom,
and I’ve been told to talk to you.
I’ve spent 25 years learin’ my craft,
a lifetime before that as a poet.
You can’t fault me
in preparation,
all prepared for yah.
Grab me by the balls will yah
and throw me to policemen,
or at least try to shut me up?
God’s will be done.
One editorial board member, Dr. Alok Pandey, who is listed as a “Member, Research Advisory Council, Sri Aurobindo Society,” replied to my emails, three times, the first: “May Her Grace be with you,” her meaning the Mother, the second: “What is tormenting your soul so much dear child?” and the third: “You are quite right. You seem to be an angry and arrogant brash revolting angel. I don’t find your poetry tasteful or even poetry. It is a blurting out of things stirring in your subconscious, not mind nor higher, but inframental forces. That’s my view about your poetry. By the way I am not part of any organization nor have any access to publishing poetries so you could perhaps try some other place or person. Good luck. May the Grace be with you.” No one else on the board or in that organization has replied.
Nithish’s Poem to His Father
Father I can’t take this pain any longer.
It’s an illness to slam you.
I am not responsible at this,
but I know what I’m talking about.
Open mind comes with smartness.
With an open heart comes the father.
It has shaken my whole world,
changed my eyes.
My path is on a unicorn,
a big one.
I look out my widow every day
and ask for freedom
from this barrier.
It’s a block.
You just got to take another way.
You can’t go through it can you?
What if my path is highlighted from the others?
I have my own dreams to chase.
I just found this poem in my carry bag two days ago. I had forgotten about it. Nithish gave it to me some days before he was taken from my home on March 12th. He had been telling me he wanted his muse to give him another poem to his father to explain things. He wanted me to tell his parents these things so that they did not put him to one day a week with me. At that moment, he was living with me during the weekdays and with his parents on the weekends. He wanted to continue the arrangement.
He wrote this poem while at school from spiritual vision, meaning that he heard each line spoken into his inner ear, and he copied it down. He does not record the lines like a poem, just writes them down, as he is dyslexic and has a lot of trouble writing. If you have read his other poems posted here, you can see he has developed more as a poet and a writer, and you can hear his feelings and thoughts spoken very clearly, what he wants his father to know, but the poem never got to his father. He was taken just a few days after he wrote it. Below is the poem in his handwriting.
An Incidence in Man
He’s read by anger.
He says it beautifully and sweetly.
I saw the changes
up front.
He’s just so confused, afraid.
I feel sorry for him.
It’s his lowest book,
give you trouble.
He doesn’t know what to do with himself.
I’ve already got complaint.
Pound the report.
He keeps forgetting the name
of the trashcan
they threw him in the night it happened.
You’ll do exactly what I say
to waters,
to water.
It pulls him.
He does it.
He masturbates in front of his father and mother.
I have a question.
Why do they want him to masturbate?
You would think it would be the other way around.
It was.
It’s soon to be pleasure house.
There, there now the father’s hand.
You’ll get a rise out of me in a minute with this.
After that
he met the strong end of the law.
Come help,
and Sandiya slapped him as he pulled,
pulls his red car.
He felt his little toy rear end.
He screamed,
and his father pulled it by the roots again.
Now, he was hysterical,
and that’s how he got into the bathroom
with his mother,
and then she syphoned his little pony to sooth,
golden fellatio.
Son of a bitch,
this is horrible news.
The vision
is exactly what happened,
all the ponies included,
and we rest our case here.
It’s too lost to talk about,
and that boy’s underwear is scared.
This was the opening for him to destroy himself.
This made him blight his tears
for me.
He couldn’t believe
it had happened,
and he kept tryin’ to forget about it.
It was a horror story
out of Genghis Khan.
Now it’s on Facebook,
and you don’t believe it.
I’m sorry it’s true.
Spiritual vision shows it,
and it has shown it all along.
You just didn’t hear me the first time.
Now they put all of this on him,
the surveillance cameras,
the total control,
the psychological manipulation,
the physical abuse,
so he wouldn’t tell me what happened that night,
and that’s why,
dear ladies and gentlemen,
he can have no contact with me whatsoever,
in any shape for form.
They do not know about consciousness.
They think you can hide somethin’
they did to a little boy,
and I’m in union with him.
They don’t know about consciousness.
They think we’re separated,
and we communicate daily.
The boy’s gotten fluffed about it,
and is trying to ignore it.
He wants to accept this abuse and move on.
He has been ruined in character,
totally humiliated
where he meets the world,
and is scared to death of his parents
when they’re in their wrath.
He will do anything for them,
except tell me to get lost.
Okay now that’s you’ve heard the story what are you gonna do?
Nothin’.
We haven’t crossed this bridge before.
You just listen to stories.
No one will question this kid
with the proper treatment.
They let his mother rule,
and she is not good to him.
Okay Pondy it’s your stuff.
You need to see this,
because this boy died on the Cross
so you wouldn’t abuse your children.
Can you figure me here?
He’s a representative example
of what you do to children,
just so exaggerated
so it has the impact it has
to show you abuse is wrong.
You don’t know about representative figures.
They’re a holy book.
They are like a Christ,
and you need to see them
so you can get the full effect.
This is godly awful, isn’t it?
Imagine what it’s like
to be one with this child,
sharing consciousness together no holds barred,
and then he’s taken from me
and has this done to him,
and I have to watch
a helpless observer.
I screamed and I carried on
to advocates, the TV news, and the Child Help Line.
No one would question that kid
or even worry about it.
I was a crazy lark
that needed to shut up,
but I’m an activist,
and I know my stuff.
This story has gone out to every major NGO in the country
that deals with child’s rights
and preventing them from being abused,
several Pondy TV news channels,
and every major newspaper in the country.
This story will get out,
when the election’s over.
There’s no stoppin’ it now,
and I’ll be right there
to receive that boy
to take him home and heal him,
because that’s what union does.
You’re unified on oneness,
and systems of abuse
do not have ground of being.
It’s a union story
of love and kindness.
It’s oneness’ story,
the heart of compassion,
knowledge of one another
where the soul sees.
I’m sorry I’m teachin’ yah new things.
You’re not good with innovative stuff
when it involves the terms and conditions of our being,
what a human being is,
and how it tries
to rise up out of human being
into the next class.
I give you there
with this kid.
That’s our endeavor together,
to change man.
Now tell me again I can’t heal this kid,
but the truth of the matter
is that we’ll heal each other.
I’m in the same shape he’s in,
only I will take the lead
because I’m his daddy,
and daddies,
my sweet audience,
really do know best.
Thank you Pondicherry
for letting him heal at my house,
his home before all this started,
his place of refuge and safety,
a place of loving dog.
And that,
my dear friends,
is where this chapter ends.
Did you know dogs are with us to become human beings?
The soul says this,
and evolution’s its spur.
That’s why they live in our homes.
That’s why they’re our children.
They have an appointment with destiny
when they change to the higher kind,
and for a mountain of dog lives
they learn the ways of human being,
until they become a Lisa,
my beloved dead Rottweiler,
and they have the magic of human being in their eyes
growin’ their understanding inside.
They have reached the pinnacle of dog,
and our house raises dog,
and that boy’s right in the middle of it,
lovin’ those dogs
and those dogs lovin’ him.
Imagine how his dogs felt when he was taken.
They’ve never seen him again.
We have the ingredients for healing I tell you,
even in the notion of dream.
It’s candy for us.
What did you dream last night?
And we all tell.
We have a healing house,
and we’re ready for this boy
to return.
Now Pondicherry we’re a prototype,
and you’ve gotta be big enough to see it.
You’re a big enough town for it.
The supramental manifestation on Earth
descended here first.
You grapple with big things.
It’s time you knew that,
and it’s you Pondicherry,
you,
that replaces Jerusalem
as the city of hope,
the city of peace,
and we’re here to help you with that,
me and this boy.
Okay Pondicherry,
let us heal.
You’ll have to give me the man roles.
What have we here?
Look at this kid,
strangely peacock
even in defeat.
Are you listenin’ Pondicherry?
Tell me a secret.
I get him smooth.
You crazy person,
you’re by the wall;
I’ll try not to
tell you to get lost
after the election.
We are the soul rise,
he and I,
and I understand your concern,
and I understand your confusion.
Boy get it to become man,
and we’re hit Pondicherry on the head
of its going to school.
Now laugh at that will yah,
and tell me I’m a fool.
You haven’t read his poetry yet,
nor seen that strength of soul.
Just sit back and relax
and review our material.
Videos, poems, and songs
will knock your socks off,
will do your head in,
will be kind and gentle and sweet,
every time you see us talk,
but we will be loud,
and awfully bright.
Now here am I in front of Pondicherry,
goodnight.
Hey, can I get you something?
Do you need to cut us up in pieces and throw it away?
You don’t need to do anything except go with the movement.
We know how to ride the storm.
What happened?
You heard the story that they took ‘im
and all that ensued,
and I am his daddy,
and I would like to raise him again.
All sorts of thought
we give you Pondicherry.
One came in a dog suit.
Vision of Luna. (vision of my Rottweiler standing outside near a wood)
The wrong
people
have that boy now.
You need to see this
and make it right.
You can see the future in us
if you look hard enough.
Nithish and his daddy,
now that’s an item.
There’s no reason to fear that now.
He’ll be at break tomorrow.
The train station
on Friday comin’ here.
I’ll have to turn him in the grocery store,
and toys,
many presents,
we let him have.
He’s got a healin’ train a comin’,
and it’s at the station now.
What an active young man.
Who are you?
The poet
of the sunrise of humanity.
Let’s move his truck,
and he can express that,
and I’m his keeper,
and I’m his teacher
there at dawn too.
Please hear us.
We’re the Milky Way.
We’ve got good news,
the colors in the rainbow,
either in social media
or every place you meet us on the street.
That’s rock bottom vision.
It goes like this:
do you hear our pull?
We’re a look out for human beings.
Can I wash off the dog?
Get it right with human beings.
Nithish is with his parents.
Don’t say anything now.
One for… (vision of Nithish sitting at a computer and his mother and auntie are standing behind him, Sandiya taking a photo of him with a flat, silver, square camera, telling him to pose, and I realize they are taking a photo record of him to compete with mine, making a sudden concentrated effort to do that to rival the photos I post of him)
It looks like a photo shoot,
and they’ve got the video to prove it.
And there he is.
I had no idea.
Nithish you’re asking me a question:
where do you divide the partition?
As long as you’re careful not to do that,
tear me apart,
we wouldn’t partition ourselves.
Your parents are using you for propaganda.
They’re taking pictures to rival me.
I took spontaneous pictures of you.
The difference is tearing me apart.
You’re open
to they put you here they put you there,
like they’re doin’ it for you,
and you give them that warm smile,
thinking you have their business.
It’s not the same baby dog,
and I wonder if you can even feel it,
so lost you are in their approval and validation,
so far you are away from me.
I don’t like Bozos,
Bozo the Clown.
Put that on the street.
Grace school is himself. (vision of Grace his Beagle puppy standing in a table chair on her hind legs with her front paws on the table)
He’s in his underwear.
He’s big and small and little and mean.
He won’t take no for an answer.
He’s not dedicated to you,
and something happened that changed his mind.
You did not seem relief.
You were not there for him.
You didn’t come,
and you were crazy with grief.
You wanted to see him so badly
it turned him away from you.
He doesn’t respect you.
He believes the brainwashing.
He doesn’t know what’s up.
He doesn’t care to find out.
You want to know if he’s happy
and doesn’t need you.
He can’t find himself.
He’s alone on the inside,
and if you can’t see sadness in his eyes,
you can feel it in his heart.
He wants to see you
and need is comin’.
He doesn’t understand what’s happened.
He’s too little for that.
He wants so see you
help.
He has not gained by loosing you.
His life is something forcing.
He’s a painted doll.
You are his flower.
He just wants to sit and be with you,
but he doesn’t want to see this too loudly.
He doesn’t want to be in the garbage can
anymore
with his parents.
All that’s over.
That he doesn’t renounce you that’s okay.
They just keep him from you,
and the phone call the other day they got by.
You’re crazy and confused his mind
was their answer.
And now you’ve declared you’re gonna die to see ‘im,
hunger strike.
I’m in trouble.
This will all fall on me.
Hear him now?
Is he worried about you?
They don’t want him to be but yes.
He doesn’t want you to die.
Will he do anything to stop it?
He would try.
Now all this bad news,
that makes you feel so bad,
is gonna change.
When you see him again you’ll know you’re there,
and he will remember past lives,
and he’ll want it there.
He’ll reveal secrets.
He will be with you in every heartbeat,
and this will open that boy’s mind
to convince his parent’s of his need to see you.
This is incredible news
and will change the story.
He will be yours again,
and they will have to contend with that.
Is there a public on the way?
It happened.
The public got wind of this,
and you’re showin’ it to them now.
You’re in the Pondy poems,
and this one’s the big one
for their being’s worth.
He has my note.
He has my seven.
We need him to see you,
and that’s soon.
He doesn’t know which way is up.
And you’re gonna show him Heaven’s door. (vision of Nithish sitting on the curb of a street and looking up at me with such open love)
He’s the taste in your room.
You’re his special surprise.
He knows you’re comin’.
Will you listen to me?
This was our world,
the great and hidden pain of death.
And you’ve got me on time,
before I forgot you.
There I’ll see you on Friday.
You make the test model fight too.
It’s prevision,
and it will become active soon.
Oh there were his plug pluses down there.
There were him.
“The samadhi of the Gods is in my heart
water drops.”
He will felt good listenin’.
Have you watched your video yet?
I’m not lookin’ to do that.
What’s wrong with you?
No contact with me,
that and I want you to leave me alone.
Two notes from the ranger.
You are being awfully bad.
We have to waste time here and I show it to you.
Here,
and will you come when they ask?
I would go in a heartbeat.
But you won’t watch the video?
I’m scared to feel the pain.
I don’t want to remember you.
I don’t want to cry.
Alright little boy,
you aren’t the greatest little boy in the world,
but I will see you soon.

The Pressure of Unspoken Tears
ஆங்கிலப் பதிப்பிற்குப் பிறகுதான் தமிழ் மொழிபெயர்ப்பு.
Can you show me what he’s hiding?
Can you show me what he’s seen?
Twelve feet in him (horrible vision of Nithish drowning in an indoor swimming pool, only his face visible, on it terror and pain)
the psychological manipulation of his tears.
Where he bothered you:
he’s gonna have to clean up the horse
and the skin his mother gave him
and all his father’s done.
This has been gross, ugly, and mean.
It’s nonstop it hasn’t let up.
This is hurt him
deep in being’s ways.
His warm heart is gone.
He’s not himself.
He’s not even trying.
He would like to just go to bed.
He acts normal and sweet,
and then he flies off the handle at the slightest provocation.
He can’t deal with himself.
He’s scared to be alone.
He’s spends his time alone
in the middle of everybody.
He would like to kill himself sometimes.
He hates himself for giving in
to his parents.
He doesn’t know how to deal with the string between his legs.
It’s all confusing for him.
He doesn’t know where is up.
He would like to let go.
He doesn’t know how to talk
if anyone asks him about daddy.
He loves daddy,
but he can’t remember him properly.
He’s a very unhappy little boy
behind that smile of his,
and here’s where we find his pain:
he has to hide it,
or his parents get mad at him,
and here there is no relief.
Why is he crying his unwashed tears?
You would not hear a tear.
In the very beginning
this was shut up inside him
when his mother shut off those tears
to keep him from reminding her she’d done wrong
in taking him from daddy,
so abruptly,
so cruelly,
and so never see him again.
This broke the boy’s mind,
made him languish on himself,
took his heart and tore it in two
where no hope that it ever mend,
and this is what he carries around
to this day.
Now you laugh at him for being weak,
being such a titty-baby,
or you frown on him.
He’s never mentioned his daddy’s name
or that he wants to see him,
but he cannot speak I tell you,
and I’ve shown you all these gears inside,
but the day is coming
this boy will explode,
and he will tell everything
his parents have done to him
to make daddy a phantom in his mind
and a dead man in his heart.
To take this love this sweet boy had
and make him kill it in himself,
you have not seen this day
the boy lets all this out.
What do you think his silence is saying?
“I’m going to explode I’m going to explode.”
And there will be heart keeps
showing the world what he’s seen.
No one will doubt what his parents have done to him,
and no one will doubt what he needs.
He needs daddy.
That’s good for children.
They need to hear it,
and it’s eleven o’clock.
And who’s name do we use?
A fighting chance.
Where is the boy?
Emergency
who can’t be seen,
but you know he’s there.
Look in your photographs.
This will arrange things.
This is what he needs to see.
It’s good for him sweetheart.
Don’t worry.
This is not next year.
He’s coming upon this now,
and it’s a long ways away
from his certain grasp of himself.
He comes to her with such a smile,
and he knows I’m in pain.
It was your mother’s pride.
Will he hurt his daddy?
No my sweet boy
you’re okay with me,
and the festival tomorrow
we did run.
Did you know that?
Give it to him fiercely and nicely,
this boy’s destiny,
why so much pain.
He’s the poet of a sunrise,
and he will help children everywhere
from systems of abuse.
See you tomorrow
twisting,
turning,
and he knows there’s a difference
between what his mother tells him
and what I do.
This isn’t fair him.
You need to see his face.
There are bruises on it from a gifted childhood
right at the point
they put a said on the planet.
Are you game for watching heroes?
Watch this boy.
Now will you help?
I’d like to see him.
There.
சொல்லப்படாத கண்ணீரின் அழுத்தம்
அவர் மறைத்து வைத்திருப்பதைக் காட்ட முடியுமா?
அவர் பார்த்ததை எனக்குக் காட்ட முடியுமா?
அவருக்குள் பன்னிரெண்டு அடிகள்
அவரது கண்ணீரின் உளவியல் கையாளுதல். (உள்துறை நீச்சல் குளத்தில் மூழ்கி நித்திஷின் பயங்கரமான பார்வை, அவன் முகம் மட்டும் தெரியும், அதில் பயங்கரமும் வலியும்)
அவர் உங்களை எங்கே தொந்தரவு செய்தார்:
அவர் குதிரையை சுத்தம் செய்ய வேண்டும்
மற்றும் அவரது தாய் அவருக்கு கொடுத்த தோல்
மற்றும் அவரது தந்தை செய்த அனைத்தும்.
இது மொத்தமாகவும், அசிங்கமாகவும், மோசமானதாகவும் இருந்தது.
இது இடைவிடாது அது விடவில்லை.
இது அவரை காயப்படுத்துகிறது
இருப்பின் வழிகளில் ஆழமாக.
அவரது சூடான இதயம் போய்விட்டது.
அவர் தானே இல்லை.
அவர் முயற்சி செய்வதும் இல்லை.
அவர் படுக்கைக்குச் செல்ல விரும்புகிற.
அவர் இயல்பாகவும் இனிமையாகவும் செயல்படுகிறார்,
பின்னர் அவர் கைப்பிடியில் இருந்து பறக்கிறது சிறிய ஆத்திரமூட்டலில்.
அவர் தன்னை சமாளிக்க முடியாது.
அவர் தனியாக இருக்க பயப்படுகிறார்.
அவர் தனது நேரத்தை தனியாக செலவிடுகிறார்
அனைவருக்கும் நடுவில்.
சில சமயங்களில் தன்னைக் கொல்ல விரும்புவார்.
விட்டுக்கொடுப்பதற்காக அவர் தன்னை வெறுக்கிறார்
அவரது பெற்றோருக்கு.
அவர் கால்களுக்கு இடையில் இருக்கும் சரத்தை எப்படி சமாளிப்பது என்று தெரியவில்லை.
அவனுக்கு எல்லாமே குழப்பமாக இருக்கிறது.
அவனுக்கு தெரியாது எந்த திசையில் எந்த திசையில் மேலே செல்ல வேண்டும்.
அவர் விட்டுவிட விரும்புகிறார்.
அவருக்குப் பேசத் தெரியாது
அப்பாவைப் பற்றி யாராவது அவரிடம் க daddy.
அவர் daddy நேசிக்கிறார்,
ஆனால் முடியாது ஆனால் அவரை சரியாக நினைவில் கொள்ள முடியவில்லை.
அவர் இப்போது மிகவும் மகிழ்ச்சியற்ற சிறு பையன்.
அவன் புன்னகையின் பின்னால்
அவருடைய வலியை இங்கே காணலாம்:
அவர் அதை மறைக்க வேண்டும்
அல்லது அவனுடைய பெற்றோர் அவன் மீது கோபம் கொள்கிறார்கள்,
மற்றும் இங்கே நிவாரணம் இல்லை.
கழுவாத கண்ணீரை ஏன் அழுகிறார்?
நீங்கள் கண்ணீர் கேட்க மாட்டீர்கள்.
ஆரம்பத்திலேயே
இது அவருக்குள் மூடியிருந்தது
அவன் அம்மா அந்த கண்ணீரை அணைத்த போது
அவள் தவறு செய்ததை அவளுக்கு நினைவூட்டுவதைத் தடுக்க
daddy விடமிருந்து அவரை அழைத்துச் செல்வதில்,
மிகவும் திடீரென்று,
மிகவும் கொடூரமாக,
அதனால் அவன் daddy வை இனி பார்க்கவே மாட்டான்.
அது சிறுவனின் மனதை உடைத்தது மனம்.
இது அவனை தன்னுள் புதைத்துக்கொள்ள வைத்தது.
இது அவரது இதயத்தை எடுத்து இரண்டாகப் பிரித்தது,
மற்றும் அது எப்பொழுதும் சரியாகும் என்ற நம்பிக்கை இல்லை.
அவர் இதை எல்லா இடங்களிலும் கொண்டு செல்கிறார்
இந்த நாள் வரைக்கும்.
இப்போது நீங்கள் மிகவும் சிறிய பையனைப் போல நடந்த கொள்வதற்காக அவரைப் பார்த்து சிரிக்கிறீர்கள்
அல்லது நீங்கள் அவரை முகம் சுளிக்கிறீர்கள்.
அவர் daddy வின் பெயரைக் குறிப்பிடவில்லை,
அல்லது அவர் அவரைப் பார்க்க விரும்புகிறார்.
ஆனால் அவரால் பேச முடியாது, நான் உங்களுக்கு சொல்கிறேன்.
இந்த கியர்களை எல்லாம் அவருக்குள் காட்டியிருக்கிறேன்.
ஆனால் நாள் வருகிறது
இந்த சிறுவன் வெடிக்கப் போகிறான் என்று.
அவர் எல்லாவற்றையும் சொல்வார்
அவரது பெற்றோர் செய்தார்கள்
அதனால் அவர் daddy வை ஒரு மாயத்தோற்றம் என்று நினைப்பார் அவரது மனதில்
மற்றும் அவரது இதயத்தில் ஒரு இறந்த மனிதன்.
இந்த இனிய சிறுவனை daddy மீதான காதலை கொல்ல வைக்க,
இந்த நாளை நீங்கள் பார்க்கவில்லை
சிறுவன் அதையெல்லாம் வெளியே விடுகிறான்.
அவருடைய மௌனம் என்ன சொல்கிறது என்று நினைக்கிறீர்கள்?
"நான் வெடிக்கப் போகிறேன், நான் வெடிக்கப் போகிறேன்."
மற்றும் அவர் தனது இதயத்தில் என்ன வைத்திருக்கிறார்
அவர் பார்த்ததை உலகுக்குக் காட்டுகிறது.
அவனுடைய பெற்றோர் அவனுக்கு என்ன செய்தார்கள் என்று யாரும் சந்தேகிக்க மாட்டார்கள்.
அவருக்கு என்ன தேவை என்பதை யாரும் சந்தேகிக்க மாட்டார்கள்.
அவருக்கு daddy தேவை.
அது குழந்தைகளுக்கு நல்லது.
அவர்கள் அதைக் கேட்க வேண்டும்.
இப்போது மணி பதினொன்று.
மேலும் யாருடைய பெயரைப் பயன்படுத்துகிறோம்?
ஒரு சண்டை வாய்ப்பு.
பையன் எங்கே?
நெருக்கடி
யாரை பார்க்க முடியாது,
ஆனால் அவர் அங்கு இருக்கிறார் என்பது உங்களுக்குத் தெரியும்.
உங்கள் புகைப்படங்களில் பாருங்கள்.
இது விஷயங்களை ஏற்பாடு செய்யும்.
அவர் பார்க்க வேண்டியது இதுதான்.
இது அவருக்கு நல்லது அன்பே.
கவலைப்படாதே.
இது அடுத்த வருடம் அல்ல.
அவர் இப்போது இதைப் பற்றி வருகிறார்,
மற்றும் அது வெகு தொலைவில் உள்ளது
இப்போது அவர் தன் மீது வைத்திருக்கும் பிடியில் இருந்து.
அவர் ஒரு புன்னகையுடன் அவளிடம் வருகிறார்,
மற்றும் நான் வலியில் இருக்கிறேன் என்பதை அவர் அநாங்கள் தலைமை தாங்கினோம் என்றுறிவார்.
அது உன் தாயின் பெருமை.
அவர் daddy வை காயப்படுத்துவாரா?
இல்லை என் இனிய பையன்
நான் உன்னுடன் நன்றாக இருக்கிறேன்.
மற்றும் நாளை திருவிழா
நாங்கள் தலைமை தாங்கினோம் என்று.
உனக்கு அதை பற்றி தெரியுமா?
அதை அவருக்கு கடுமையாகவும் அழகாகவும் கொடுங்கள்,
இந்த பையனின் விதி,
ஏன் இவ்வளவு வலி.
அவர் ஒரு சூரிய உதயத்தின் கவிஞர்,
மற்றும் அவர் எல்லா இடங்களிலும் குழந்தைகளுக்கு உதவுவார்
துஷ்பிரயோகம் செய்யப்படுவதிலிருந்து.
நாளை சந்திப்போம்,
என்று திருப்புவதும் முறுக்குவதும்.
ஒரு வித்தியாசம் இருப்பதை அவர் அறிவார்
அவனுடைய அம்மா அவனிடம் சொல்வதிலிருந்து
மற்றும் நான் என்ன செய்கிறேன்.
இது அவருக்கு நியாயமில்லை.
அவன் முகத்தைப் பார்க்க வேண்டும்.
ஒரு திறமையான குழந்தை பருவத்திலிருந்தே அதில் காயங்கள் உள்ளன
என்று புள்ளியில் உள்ளது
முழு கிரகமும் அதைப் பற்றி பேசியது.
ஹிரோஸ் பார்க்க வேண்டுமா?
இப்போது நீங்கள் உதவுவீர்களா?
தயவுசெய்து அவரைப் பார்க்க எனக்கு உதவுங்கள்.
அங்கு.
A Ripple
feature image by Donny, “Look the Ripple You Touch That Child” (Gimp, the perspectives of a photograph)
Gimmie that perfume. Reach that perfume. This is the other poem you were worried about. We’ve aimed a camera so to expose the nigger. For me, it has nothing to do with Black skin. I opt it for something else, the group of people who aren’t worth much, the subhuman, the scum of the Earth, and I think we want them to do menial tasks, where they bow down and kiss our knees. The nigger among us, wow that’s high society. Hey world that’s me. We call him a dog. Wow, I’ve opened a page. Well, I need to get my bells straight. I wanna call you mean and complain? That’s not the status wood. I’ll hit yah right between the eyes. You’re beautiful plasmas of creation. You fill the air with the clamor of your being, and don’t rock the boat. You are nice to most people. You’d rather let your hair down. You are not a shopping mall nightmare. You open up to hope. I think you make the world go round, as we watch it human globe. You really try to have the right equipment. I can’t say that you’re mean. You’ll give a kid a cookie and an older person their ride. You’ll have patience with people. You’ll even call on God. This is most among us. I’m talking about the general type. Some science God matters. I’m talking to you now about the role we play when make a person a nigger. Alright, what do we hope to gain from them? Their lynching. Have you ever heard this with pedophiles? You broadcast it on TV as a precautionary tale to pedophiles: let’s burn the nigger alive. Great you said he stinks. Suffer a pedophile to live, I don’t think even granny wants that. Horrible anthem we make. Where do we put them in society? In the trash bin. Come on people see your sneeze. Move! Move! Move! You gotta get outta that chair. [vision of telling Nitish this to get him out of my computer chair so I can work, and he complies] Equity’s base does not mean stingy. I just don’t wanna get lynched, or any pedophile on the planet. I don’t want to be your counting nigger. I don’t want to grovel at your feet for a bit of ice cream. I want to be made to feel human in my very bones if I look at you and smile. I don’t want to be handed around your hatred centers. I don’t want to be made to feel alone, the only pedophile here, don’t want to feel like it’s wrong when I touch children, and I’ve only tossed their hair, and I’ve not destroyed them in the woods. I don’t want you to see me with children, and think I’ve put them on my lap for that reason, to go underground for wood. Can you see me and not think the Devil? And what’s stopping you from that now? You bleed me. You won’t even let me speak. How we solve pedophiles now, it only kills them, destroys their will: they really wanna hurt children. Now calm down. I want you to understand this. You’ve made a scapegoat mean. They just want back at you. They’ll do dirty to get it, like a Palestinian on a suicide run, or a Black man that drugs White women to rape society and tell you about it in jokes. Unawares, you laugh and applaud. He’s spit on your hamburger, made you eat his shit in a chocolate pie, and she’s just the help. Can you see reason? Will you understand science when it gets at the truth of things in its operating method? Now what’s the problem with niggers? They could move you outta your place. They could stand up and be counted. They could be you’re not superior. One forth of the town showed up to integrate. The rest came out with their shotguns. All this beer I had loaded that shotgun, and beer is a symbol wear. I think you have your own kids, and you can’t see through disease. Can we find the hatred of the pedophile on your son’s penis, and he’s in the bathtub with you, and it’s sticking up? Do you wash it then? What do you do with those feelins’ your daughter wears? She’s reached in that soapy water and grabbed you, the way that daughter’s do, their age of reason ain’t there yet. You wash hers then? Know you have to clean those things. Smile back at you sometimes. You feel a stir in yours? The slight disease, but you know it’s there. Oh let’s put them to bed, rub them on their humps, and get all sticky, the real bedtime story. Singing them a song goes like this: I can control myself, just, but I’ll open it with my spouse. Did you leave something in that room, on your kid’s soft body, making love to your spouse? Bedtime stories, repeat and say them, her crackerjacks, and she’s five or ten. I’m not sayin’ you’re a pedophile, or you even fantasize for your children. I’m talkin’ about the sticky mud a parent’s hand encounters, or their eyes, and somehow their flesh responds a hair’s worth, around their child’s genitals. I hate you pedophile. You are there. Can we get any better than that? Where do we go with this? Understand the pedophile’s not to blame for your feelings. Can you do that? I’ve gone through the eye of the needle. I don’t think you like me for it, but we have to stop molesting children, in our homes or by pedophiles, as some parents do. We come back to square one: hatred don’t solve the problem; hatred can’t solve the problem. We have to see where disease come from and stop it there. As many pedophiles as there are, and there are millions on this Earth, a parent’s hand or their mouth or their genitals made that pedophile feel theirs, all the way to orgasm and beyond. I don’t even think they know it. Are we talkin’ before memories can form? Something like that. It’s early. Can we call the other parent knowledge on this? I think they didn’t know. I’ve shown you the hooded instrument where pedophiles come from in the economy of a poem. Parents are whistlers let’s say: not only mommy and daddy. Okay it was just hard wood, no electrocution to speak of, but you see the disease. Turned five and it stopped. That was the last time she humped my thing with her mouth. It was in a beach shed, the kind you go to change clothes. She pulled my swimsuit off and I was awake. I remember being concerned about the sand in her mouth. It felt so good. I could not believe I had forgotten she used to do that. It hurt her to do it. She put a wall there after that. It never happened again. Orgasm was wonderful, and I wanted it more. The pedophile is here to tell you about it. I’m sorry momma. I understand you tried. Oh wow this is strength, not what you want to look at. How to you make it go away? You have to see the pedophile for what he is: a creation of parental love that lost control of itself. Oh man that smarts. Do you see what I’m comin’ to? A nigger made in pedophile shoes. Thank you mommy, what I told her after she done it. Get your head around that. That, that right there, what you most don’t want to see. My God it’s blind. Take the pedophile and make a nigger outta him. Don’t know what else to do. Remind you of things, suggest things, you’d put monsters to. They’re insanitory. I’m here to show them to you because you hate me, will kill me if you could, ‘cause I am a sprite of you. That’s the lowdown. That’s the nigger we need to see. Okay world I’m sorry. We didn’t have to come to this, but you’re intah whistle blowin’ and truth tellin’, like you’re so immaculate clean. You could LGBT+ me to death, and love is love you understand, like a passport, get all hot and hairy about pronouns, like you really care about different, but I know that underneath it all you’d snuff out my life if you could for being different, for love just as queer and real as yours, for love that’s returned, as you define love at least, when it’s love the child gets and not simply rape. We just have to take out the sex part. These are the things we need to see to shore up hate, get it out of the room. When it is present in us, and we haven’t seen it there as a thing that hurts, we can finally work on it; we can do something about it. It’s here, where a pedophile stands on earth, that you’ve brought hate to where it apex. Here it is its zenith noon, and this nigger is here to tell you I’m gonna rock your boat. I’m gonna… I think kindness knows the answers. Knowledge calls lines, intricately connected with you. I’m not meanin’ yah ill will. I don’t wanna ruin your day. I just wanna be heard and understood to save my life. Is that okay? Come back. Where you goin’? Call me if there any problems. Call me indeed if there are any. I have the words. That’s why I’m bothering. [spoken in Douglas’ voice] I don’t think anybody’s prepared for it. [audio vision of Bruno, our Doberman, barking his intruder alert bark] I think lemon juice put the message across, with that one guy from sobbing. It only came from that one guy. Crack of noon, lighten up. This isn’t a manifesto to love children. It’s not the pedophile’s I wanna have it you gotta give it to me. Let’s be clear on that. I’m not asking that we have sex with children. I’m tellin’ what the score is, where we come from and our place in society, even if we don’t molest children, the development of who are you to make monsters out of anyone, to make of them your nigger. The damage is done, and you’ve flooded the world with it. I’m here to saw off on that. Well I wish I was very cold. Luna. The track time of time, I want it where it’s good for me. Your engine room, may I present this? Cash on delivery. It’s not every dad. He’s not understanding. I’m talking about the swimming pool. Not every child gives their dad a bath. Come here. Not everyone bathe with their children in the wrong places, or rub them hand down at night. I’m talking about the square one hate pedophile. It comes from your fear of there’s a child sex, and you might contact with it. Their sexual feeling’s a load on you bright and early. You know they have them. If you’re a parent, I think you know they do. Does your bottle ever come up, feelings on the inside you hardly acknowledge, or one single isolated feeling in a lifetime of intimacies with your kid? Well that’s the thing, isn’t it? That’s where the holocaust is for pedophiles. There’s where you hate them, and of course you won’t acknowledge that. Who am I tryin’ to kid? I’ve done the needful. If I could get each other to be sincere with each other, then the resources would be handled. Now you’ll just throw them away and call me a nigger. The few that help, oh you are my sunshine. Thanks. Now to robbers, marauders. Simultaneously you know I’m talkin’ to you in this whole poem. I revealed a little bit of what you know about giving a kid pleasure. I don’t know how to say this to you. I understand both parties involved, but a kid’s not to have sex with. This does not good to them, their development, and development’s their order of the day. It makes them selfish, puts holes in their reaching arms, and spills them on themselves. They will be strong in some things, but you’ve done something to their social reach, pitted them against society with the secret they have to keep and the fear they live with society will find out. You don’t know what to do when you got this kid that enjoys sex and wants not to stop. I’m sorry this happens. You got to figure it’s not what gets the disease in the press or the support groups. I took some convincing. If society finds us out, that’s the problem, but we’re not good here. I’m eating on that child. There are demons in the room. That child’s getting splayed, and they’re hungry for it, and you’ve turned this on too early. They’re not ready for that. You’ve brought sex into their life, and it’s time to play with society’s noon. It’s time to representative play for that feeling sex, not to actually have it in full-blown adult room. They do that with each other not with you. And society is just dumb here. They don’t get their own time to play, even with themselves. Okay how do you stop? You’re gonna have to fix this sorry yourself. You good at rockin’ science, just keep the posted in the light. You’re a great Jew to hombre cueva’s house, if you get outta this disease. (The Jews are good to society.) I’m gonna need some help. Look you can’t get any help. It’s not allowed yet. Book, your honor. You know how to say no. You know how to say no to the Light and do that kid. Can I get in here somehow? It’s not one of our lake we’re tryin’ to keep, but we can’t tell. That would be the end of us. In those doggie bowls [vision of being seated at the computer and, Luna, on my right side, Hannah on the other, thrusting their heads, tongues hanging out, almost to the screen, they wanting petted, and I stopped and pet Luna first, wholeheartedly, on my way to Hannah, the petting session just starting] strength to a boy. Emergency to make real, emergency South African. Don’t lie to me. I’m the humanity in the room. You got this, but if you touch there you don’t. Sex ensures. It’s like a graveyard. It just gets all disturbed, wham! rises from the dead. Leave it alone. Your looks should be tempered. You know I’m talkin’ flesh. You can handle this. You can. Once you fold a piece of paper, it stays folded. Once you drop the ice, the ice melts. Don’t pick it up. It gets easier as you go along. Alright let’s sing to ourself, no images of the child in mind, no images atall. Then you’ll fall. You’re handlin’ it, continue. Integrated animal care, it fills the room. You can see that now. Faith will see you through, but I’m sorry, you can’t know God tomorrow. You have to know quite awhile. Most religions aren’t helpers. It’s a quick fix that melts in your mouth, and the reins go back to that child. Do you feel you own work on when you scream? Well let’s continue. Do will hold, even to the rapper’s balls, and tell that rapper to shut up. (We can get better music.) You just woke up corrective mountain, and it’s not the rapper yah want dead. Give me a massage. Oh, let’s get over this hump, no crack base potholes. You see what I’m dyin’? Now pick up your guitar and play the right music, wonderful skin feelings, and you haven’t climate changed your hands. I am right on yah. The map flow determines lap. He’s your lap, and there’s nothing wrong with these free buildings. Get on the miracle. Isn’t it somethin’? This is not a problem. As he sits on it you know you’ve achieved holistic solution. You’re showin’ the end of money, and you give him the life force. You’re awake inside, just narrowin’ down fillin’ wood with peppermint. Keep it comin’ the kid says, you’ve got some good candy. That child’s in love with you and wants to continue the sexual shore. Oh man it’s here do you love that child or not. That’s what it boils down to, more than anything, more than right or wrong, more than the danger of discovery, more than what you need. Now take that love and wipe your child’s brow with it. You're gonna have to take that sex away, and they have to know the reason, but they have woken up that part of themselves, and now they have the need. This has to be acknowledged. They have opened it’s obvious on the inside. You’re tryin’ to pull ‘em to safety. They can drown with this. They feel in their bodies so much. To bring that same sex with ‘em as a child. So hard to open the door, legalize them. They have to learn to please themselves, without you doing it for them. You have to unhand that thing, and I don’t expect you to do it on my command, but will you do it at all? You’re in the supermarket, and it’s there for free. What can I tell you then? How can I explain this to you? How do I it get it across? Ninety-nine cookies, hurry up now. You’ll soon have none. Drove off the ability to get it. Think about it, you really got a situation there. It’s not secure. At one point does it become too absurd to do? That child gets older. Society closes in. Let your love arrange it, and that child’s known sacrifice and constraint. My mom showed me this. She gave me this, and how good it is. You’ve made a better child not a worse one now. You have to opportunity to grow, both you and that child. Don’t they do something? Love handles it. They stay together learning strength. You are not eating anymore, and you’re free on the inside, and now you can love that child. Go for it, under these conditions, and that child knows he’s safe and hungry to do it himself. Captain, congratulations. You have really changed. Welcome home. How was it? You want bread? My love is straight. Just sit, and don’t try to handle me wrong. I think I’ve heard you, ten minutes ago. You wanna order some shelves today? Three a week or something. You’re writing poems, and before they get read they wear you. Hey boy. [vision of pulling baby Mithrin by his shirt sleeve on his shoulder as he stood on the bed] You have a lot to do, so much home challenge, of the domestic kind. You’re a good daddy keep goin’ with kids grandpa. You don’t bother them, and they love you. You’ve seen the disease, and you’re a country person speaking. You know how to handle it. Well let’s get this show on the road, this poem on the net and My love to you. Study your answers, bring them home to Me. I’m waiting for enlightenment speaks. Now do you hear movin’ movin’ movin’, keep them doggies movin’, rawhide! [this and two above lines heard sung some lines ago, but I didn’t record them until now, sung by Frankie Laine, theme song to the TV show Rawhide] I got the song. Now it’s continue. Wow, that’s three more grapes on the vine. What a wonderful shelf you got. I’m trained to. We’re gonna be meditating the poems, and that’s the story today, read them. It’s large and center free. It’s not made up by groupings. That’s down home in the hat. That’s our business with humanity. You know it on the inside. Show it on the outside. [this and above line heard sung, by Aquilo, “Human”] Wow, fight him down the street. You know it works, if you give everybody their daily bread, if everybody gets fed. I’m not about race cars. Humanity comin’ together on itself gonna take a long time. We start with today. We get rid of racism in its purist form: down with the pedophile! Bury him. I think the future of humanity will have some new shoes. You’re not gonna look so good in yours, that whole antiracism brigade. You left out the pedophile, every single one of yah, and that’s where racism’s allowed, the only place we all agree on racism. Your blindness is before your eyes today. See somethin’: here have a pedophile, he’s a nigger. Damn, I said it. I said it loud and clear. You know you had it comin’, but I’m not ill will today. What’s wrong with the world? There was this other engine that had the whole world attached to it, and it was off in the darkness, and no one could see it. The discovery should’ve made headlines. It’s just that Batman suffering you’re clouded for. We have party on the 21st, 11 a.m. Cut it open, a vault where my poems lay, and I get shined with full of light, but I’m havin’ trouble breathin’. The vault’s got me by the head. One of our supervisors, one of the race officials, they’re comin’. I wanted them to come faster. That’s all part of the game. My discovery could not ready for other projects. Are you gonna die? What’s so ethical about that map? The sex with kid thing dies. I’m afraid I’d have to find out. How many times you seen us do something right? We’ve got the creation speaks itself. Like to use your tickets. A granola bar, you give that to people. You’ll find hands with hard rocks in it that sweep up their little files. Oh today, damn, we have a busy table, so emotionally balanced, sound, in a Friday. My goodness, [vision of a tree in the cemetery next door so huge it took up the whole front part of it, its branches extending in a square-like network that filled the sky of the place, branches like a meter thick] this is snow. I’m mean it’s absolutely incredible. Glimpse ability apparent, a lifetime of handling children. They can’t keep their hands off themselves. They’re everywhere with it. They’re involved in the bath. This is simple street. You don’t get it caught in your tongue. There’s an arm way off. Solid instructions. You don’t leave out a note. You address the child in their backward movements. The denial of their active in it, that is what’s there. People need to see this. You can bring my horse back. I’m goin’ to sleep. I’ll call yah in the morning. Freefire, 4:30, you editor, at the end of the poem. It may be underestimated. [vision of a very weird tree in the cemetery, its trucks forming configurations of squares and such, the branches meters thick] What it said: I have to turn on this mic internet. We need something there. We need your help. Push this text like a principle player it is. Learn with it. We’ve got a lot to show yah on ground [heard sung by Aquilo, “Human”] and on the floor. Hurtle, enhance. [vision of a country bicycle shop on the Auroville main road, the forested section, and a sign in the front near the road that had a list of the work they do, these two things on the list sounding in my inner ear] Reach something and write it down. Try to make this pony ride. [vision of a sort of very large, brownish red greeting card made to look like a small house or important building, but just the suggestion of that, it turning as I looked at it so it could be seen better] World Heritage Site, that’s what we reach with this. It’s a continually interesting piece of balance. Comin home the leeway. You have got this system starts. Refresh it everyday.
Look at the Outcast
Infant Orgasm,
Infant Orgasm You See
(Note: from July 2016 to December 2016, I posted seer poems on Facebook written specifically for our educational page Harm’s End. I know FB was aware of the posting at the time, because some poems were boosted and had to go through Facebook’s review process, with one being rejected, one about the prophet Mohammad, although FB did not take it down or flag it in any way. On August 4, 2020, I copied all the poems, along with their images, to my computer, and a day later a poem from 2016 was taken down for violating their community standards, showing me my activity was being closely monitored by FB. I then deleted any image I thought FB might object to, unaware that an image of Hitler is now flagged by FB as a matter of course. That it is now but wasn’t in 2016 reflects a growing trend of censorship on the net. It won’t be long before anything that seriously questions the generally accepted reality construct or tires to introduce things that construct isn’t seeing and doesn’t want to will be banned from the major social media platforms and taken as far as possible out of the public eye. In other words, the net will become like TV.
This poem along with this image was posted on FB September 10, 2016. It was flagged August 15, 2020, but not taken down, citing it violated their community standards, and I edited it the following day, adding material in brackets within the poem that explain the poetry, to make it clear I wasn’t violating their community standards. Within 10 minutes after editing it, our page Harm’s End was unpublished. Although this poem fits into a poetic conversation on my FB feed and is out of context to post here by itself, I’m posting it here to protest the censorship of art and poetry on Facebook and on the net in general, in this case, poetry whose purpose it is to heal, not harm, however controversial it may be.)
Executive order.
Anyway she just surprised me.
Hitler, the 1st letters of incest,
rape.
It started World War II.
Half the money
the gate come open.
What come out?
I know it,
the material,
the material of war,
the material of concrete war.
Incest gun,
check it out.
That’s not a gift.
It’s an orgasm
your mom gives ya,
or your dad,
an adult in the family.
The house owner
outside of somethin’.
It’s American.
We know it’s German.
It’s also England,
all countries,
just a story on it
broken.
You wouldn’t hit everybaby,
enough to organize
the required material.
Is that war?
You said it baby.
It’s German
under the feet.
That means it’s right there:
kill ‘em,
thousands gas.
Bring them on the table
but be careful.
Daddy was good wasn’t he
or mommy special?
We do this in an orderly fashion.
Got that right.
Just line ‘em up
and shoot ‘em,
terrible.
I’m gonna
keep comin’.
What’s this?
An orderly compound,
an orderly room.
Procedure, procedure?
And we built the gas chambers,
and we built
orgasm.
Give that kid
trouble,
not between his legs,
not
now,
not now.
Look out the window.
Go to the door.
It needs an umbrella:
the night of the generals.
They have a very detailed IQ.
THEY.
People are bad.
Not everybody.
He doesn’t like,
he has a very knowledgeable
presence with Jews.
Art school,
they wouldn’t let ‘im in.
Art college,
they wouldn’t let him in now.
Okay make them unworthy,
lump them with all the undesirables,
society’s degenerates,
but blame them for everything.
They are the masterminds
of all that’s wrong with the world,
of all that’s wrong with our country.
[understand the poetry: those are Hitler’s views, not the poet’s.]
Fell down –
see a war,
a war,
a world war:
give to me
my mountain.
You have to understand
orgasm.
It changes war.
It’s a blitzkrieg
of physical pleasure
on an I unformed.
One second.
There’s an I.
Is there
more like the animal I.
Is that me?
That building centerfold
the earth
is removed from the scene.
I’m a baked chump,
burn in a holocaust of pleasure.
Understand
repeated action,
all this mess over time.
It has a tendency
to rob you of pleasure,
organize your role
an antenna
to try and get things in order,
down
if you know what I mean,
not up in the sky.
Look at
the nice uniforms,
the insignia,
the roll of tanks.
You’ve been robbed you see,
and that damage,
and you in ego formation,
and God did it,
your parent.
Any questions Paramount?
That’s it.
(There is, it should be understood, a personal interpretation to this poem throughout, since, in truly inspired art, in seer poetry especially, it’s at bottom, however remotely, also about the artist. In this light, the verse about Hitler being rejected from art college and subsequently scapegoating all Jews because of that can also be interpreted to be about the refusal of my entire society, Jews, non-Jews, everybody, to let me into the art of the day, but the personal interpretation isn’t tit for tat with the poem, as it just lights upon it here and there. If you want to know how the personal interpretation applies to the main subject of the poem, infant orgasm, read this comment I posted on Medium before my Medium account is also suspended, because I color outside the lines.
If you want to know the occult truth behind Hitler, read the book The Light That Shone Into the Dark Abyss by Maggi Lidchi-Grassi, 1994, Sri Aurobindo Ashram Press (not available to read online). Facebook, which almost a third of the world’s population uses, has such an unwarranted and inequitable influence over the knowledge that we pass around, and it (like not only the other online mega-businesses, but also the major news outlets and the great majority of the entertainment industry I might add) is in its core beliefs reductionist materialist, however many employees it has that doesn’t hold those beliefs. If that’s not enough, it’s in it for profit, and if Facebook encounters material that makes people feel uncomfortable, a loss of profit steps in and makes the decision, and even if it doesn’t violate its policies, FB will simply ban it. Now, the truth of us, the good, the bad, and the ugly, it might hurt to hear it, you know?
Is the human matter finished? I mean, is there anything more to discover about us other than the fundamental beliefs that we’ve built human society upon, and those are that we are individual human islands expendable to the sea of humanity and inconsequential compared to it, islands possessing an absolute freewill and a consciousness that doesn’t extend beyond the island that we each are, and, in the intrinsic ground of who we are, we are nothing more than that island? Here we are at the cutting edge of humanity. This is the denied knowledge trying to gain entry: there is more to discover about us, and we are more than that.
I’ll end with an analogy to put the subject matter of this poem into a context that will make what I’m attempting here more apparent:
“This thing no one ever talks about before, and when we are the first ones to talk about it, there are a lot of people that think this thing shouldn’t be touched, this thing is you know, sacred, and the people that think you are going too far, and all of these people are going to undermine our movement, for sure.” Quote from a Thai protester in Bangkok speaking to a BBC reporting about protesters questioning the power of the Thai monarchy. Source: BBC video “Thai protests: Thousands join rally in Bangkok”, 17 Aug 2020.)







