The Damage We Do to Earth

photo by the author
Is by human nature human nature changed?
Let’s defeat our purpose.
Let’s go around the Mulberry pole again.
Let’s just not listen to our teachers.
I will by human nature outcast this person,
in the middle of a human unity project,
where the Integral Yoga was set down on Earth,
and I will do this willfully and strongly,
not caring for the consequences.

This is how it’s done,
if you want to protect the group from someone.
You don’t give them also divine eyes,
and you give them no public venue,
and by that I mean you keep their voice unheard,
and you ghost them forever and ever without end
in your little social bubble.
It’s high time we changed that,
in such a powerful place as ours

that holds such meaning for the Earth.
Are you with me?
I think not.

The opposite poles of human unity,
that’s the whole way to rape the system,
when we keep them apart.
I’m a whirlwind of the proper material.
Don’t you confuse me with panic.
I have my rocking chair,
my golden years.

I am the toilet that speaks
one more time.
I just want you to consider your own goodness.
Why would you castigate me?
Because God’s the author of punishment,
and God’s called you to punish me?
Sri Aurobindo gave this commandment:
thou shalt punish the wayward sadhak?
The Mother despised sin
and dealt out punishments to people?
The Integral Yoga hates sin?
The One cannot stomach me?

Let’s look at your business.
You don’t know who you are.
You are not the sadhak with the name you call.
You are not the Aurovillian you sign your name as.
You are a person beyond time.
You can’t get this right.
You think it’s some far away,
and you are supposed to act in human terms.
The Zeitgeist says it;
you carry it out.

There were times and there are places
I would not be the ass among you.
Your morality is relative to the times.
You can’t see straight
when you face a sinner
your town and country hates.
This is rock bottom being human.
You see it unleashed on the globe,
this breach of oneness.
We are killing each other over it.

Oh Islamic State was a model for our eyes.
They thought they were justified
in bringing the hell they did
to punish people,
or the Nazi and the Jew.
The scapegoat they made
was another attempt at Nature
running something into the ground
in her symbol wrought her blind actions speak.
The availability of the Jew as the scapegoat
came to show us we wear scapegoating shoes
as the modus operandi of ego-led society.

You don’t have a field for this:
where we take our scapegoats and make them human again.
You just hate
and justify your hatred
by the human mass.
You are not godly citizens.
You burn witches.

You have been given a vehicle of thought
unparalleled in the history of thought
to arouse your stomach,
to change your heart,
to detach from this human clay
the pettiness of human life,
the vile emotions we feel for one another
and see beyond the play,
and bring yourself out of this turmoil
and into the light of day.
You quote these fields all the time.
The Mother said this.
Sri Aurobindo wrote that.

The Integral Yoga can heal anything.
I have been among you 20 years showing that,
but you cannot see it.
You don’t want to.
You will not apply the lessons you’ve learned Integral Yoga.
You will just deny,
hate,
and castigate,
and as a group you do this.
What do I do to bring you to peace
over this person named Donny Duke?

I offer you my home
for a station of tea,
and you won’t even answer me,
stubbornly justified in your ill will
by human morality that has no part God.
I am the reason for Auroville’s fall,
and I graft upon it
the deception of a poet
that hides his sins with godly words,
wants to commit them among you if you but let ‘im,
deceiving the elect with holy lore.
You don’t know the price of sin.
You don’t get away with it,
even if no one finds your ruse.
Say you’re a sadhak close to God.
You have no way to hide,
and you learn to do what you’re told
to get out of your mess.

It does not take forever.
Low and behold I have sinned and healed that sin
and given the beauty of art
to give you examples of healing’s ways,
and now it’s reached astounding.
You will not sit up and take notice.
You will not even let it in your groups.
No one can read it.
No one can see it.
You hate art
the scapegoat of the day makes,
the one hated among you
by an agreement of the times.

Ladies and gentlemen,
will you castigate me for all eternity,
name my sins and how ugly they were,
without ever seeing the unexpected good that can come from woeful deeds,
without ever admitting that God has a plan
even for one such as me?
This is stubborn willfulness
out of the hour of God,
away from the lessons of truth.
Who is the greatest sinner?
I forgive you of your self-righteousness.
I understand your state.
I don’t blame you for being human,
but we can’t stay in this state.
We are called to greater life,
and we have to go together or none.
The people that refuse,
God just takes more time with them.
Are you one of those?

This poem was recently rejected by Collaboration, A Journal of the Integral Yoga, whom I have submitted numerous poems to over the years, hands down the publication I’ve submitted to most, because it is a publication of our yoga, it’s name claims inclusiveness, and it’s by fellow Americans, but they have not published a single poem. I have this theory, and I submitted this poem to prove it to myself at least, that they will never publish a poem I submit, regardless of the quality and truth of the poem. This poem explains why.

In other news, the admin of the Facebook group Friends of Auroville approved it, although the other Auroville Facebook groups I submitted it to didn’t, and it was submitted to Auroville Today and Auroville News, and Auroville Today at least replied rejecting it. Auroville News did not reply this time, and they too I’ve sent poems to over the years.

Prayin’ for the Hour of God

This poem was posted on the private Facebook group Auroville International. If you have been following recent posts on this blog, I’ve chronicled how they’ve declined everything I’ve tried to post on that Facebook group, totaling nine posts. Now, do I erase all I’ve chronicled? No, I think this might be valuable to show what it means to be heard.

Many a short to a poem.
They won’t do definition.
They get Auroville
working
in its nitty-gritty.
I’m a mountain boat.
We’ve gotta come up with a freeway
to blanket taxes.
Are you on the hate side of reason?
Does anybody get your goat?
Would you like to see them punished?

I’m a round about can.
You’re supposed to do this in your underwear.
I’ll let them know
they have my vote today,
and I will drop all punishment lists
and let them be there,
on the star of human unity,
and I will include them in the new human being.
How can I ensure all this happens?
I don’t require of them anything.
I am just kind to them,
whatever they’ve done,
whoever they are.

If it’s really close to home,
some dirt they’ve done,
my gee that hurt
I will tell them,
but I’m not going to hate you in this conversation.
I’m going to battle you with love.
It’s my duty as an Aurovillian.
Can’t you see the problem?
Human unity cannot hate.
It cannot exclude anyone
from its acceptance speech,
meaning you ignore no one,
and all get your goodwill.
Are we right on that?

That’s the holistic speaker.
That’s how we bring human unity into the room
and not just talk about it.
You with me kids?
I didn’t think so.
I’m just teachin’ yah how to be human,
and you refuse me.
Are you still a mountain to my molehill?

Unconscious everybody
take the city apart.
It can’t stand from within.
A foreign body of law
then comes in
and lords it over all of yah.
Let’s get the goats out of the shed.
She’s not gonna happen
you have no more scapegoats.
That’s a big horse you’re ridin’ Auroville,
and you’ve achieved human unity.

What else is it but including everyone
in the worth you give human being?
You don’t have to take them to lunch.
You don’t have to tie their shoe.
You give them the time of day
like you mean it.
There’s nobody that gets excluded from this.
Alright Aurovillian,
measure up.

Now look behind you.
I’m on your report card.
I open to you
a scientific altar ego,
the scapegoat of the day
where sexual sin meets the railroad tracks.
Nailed on the Cross to suffer with Jesus I said
this isn’t working.
I can’t author you along.
I can’t show you art.
I can’t startle you with spiritual experience.
World experience doesn’t impress you
or the quality of my education
Classical Greek and all that.
Even that I’m a kind human being
that cleans his own house
and makes buttered bread for yah
doesn’t move your feet.
Tada!
It’s a miracle
my boy back this evenin’,
and it wasn’t supposed to happen in a million years.
That made me human to you.

Okay let’s go.
We got so many who just need good faith
to add to their humanity to make it work,
or at least put try on the table.
Come on let’s go brother,
and let’s get goin’ sister.
Made you human enough to look
center stage,
and that’s where we need to be blessed,
oh people of Auroville.

That was an impossibility
you threw away my opportunity
that boy’s comin’ home.
We’re going to do some work
in other children’s bedrooms,
and I’m just going one, one, one.
Silly boys, eight girls,
this tie your shoe.
In the nominal,
in the history of God,
where will we hunch those things?
I want you to lay down,
and we’re gonna move through dream to spiritual experience.
That’s my forte with kids,
and I know how to do it,
and I love it there.
Not the shoes.
A little open-minded—
if I don’t touch a worry root,
okay?
Now let’s get God manifested on this Earth.

photos by the author

This is the Character of Man

S. Nithish, 12-years-old, photo by his daddy

ஆங்கில பதிப்புக்கு கீழே தமிழ் மொழிபெயர்ப்பு.

I am not just an idealist. I have practical means in my hands. The conversation we need to be having as a humanity is not about climate change, or stopping war, or whatever pressing issue confronts us. It’s how we raise our children. We go to the roots of society and change there. It will take a long time to get a world conversation going on this pressing need, but we can start right here in Pondicherry and maybe Auroville too.

I would like to start a group with you to facilitate that very thing. We would need to have some sort of charter to present to the conversation, and then we push that conversation onto the news media and Pondicherry social and charitable organizations, and we would push with much force, using examples of abuse such as what Nithish is undergoing. There are five main points we press.

The number one thing we give any child is that they learn to love God and seek God in whatever form or name their soul chooses, and that becomes apparent as the child gets older. It might be the God or Gods the parents follow, but, as in the case of Nithish, it might be a different definition of God. (I might add here that is not the Mother but Supermind.)

Number two, the child is taught that they have a soul and that it has a purpose for their life, and it’s the job of the child and the parents to find that purpose as the child grows up.

If the parents are atheist, then they give their child the love of the highest ideals in humanity, compassion, empathy, self-giving, self-sacrifice, respect for the individual, self-respect, and sincerity to name a few. And the atheist parents are open to that child also loving God if that happens, and they endeavor to discover the child’s natural talents and abilities and help the child to express those in their schooling and in their choice of vocation.

Three, we define child abuse not only to mean physically or sexually abusing them, or abusing children emotionally, but also to include controlling your child beyond their needs to be controlled. It would also include not allowing them to see someone significantly important to the child whom the child loves dearly, grandparents, trusted adult, whomever. It would include what Nithish’s parents are doing to him, brainwashing and psychologically manipulating him to love them and not his American parent. He is a good example of the spectrum of abuse, and I would like to make his example known in Pondicherry.

Physical abuse will be defined as giving any physical pain to your child so to punish them or be mean to them. Sexual abuse will be defined as touching your child’s genitals in any context other than washing them or healing them. I have seen in the urban village of Kuruchikuppam mothers, grandmothers, fathers, grandfathers, aunties, uncles, and just people nearby play with the penis of boys under five, as a regular practice. Although it’s not now known in science, the boys grow up and disrespect women, and, if the playing with it is more intense, that boy will grow up gay or to be a pedophile.

Four, school will be more focused on teaching children to be good human beings rather than on academics, but academics will still be important. Nothing will by forced on them to learn, and their own will will be respected, and they will be taught to use their will beginning when they are very small, so they can control themselves, and their will is not broken by their parents or teachers.

And five, what characterizes our group from any other group working for change in the world is that we are holistic in our methods and do not condemn the abuser and do not deny them their humanity and their own healing. We harmonize the abuser into the process of healing, as a passenger, do not call for their punishment, do not use anger and hatred to deal with them, although allowing the abused child to be angry at them is part of the healing process of that child. We, the people facilitating the healing of child abuse, use reason and compassion, but in cases where a child needs protected and fast, we would use the police if need be. When the abuser and the child are ready, we will allow contact between them so that healing can occur. This is holistic healing, soul healing, how we heal in the afterlife, although this is still unknown. The Nithish Foundation will show the reality of this healing method to the world.

I call the group Nithish Foundation because he is the occasion for it. In America, when a new child abuse law is passed, it’s named after the child that caused the law to be made.

இதுதான் மனிதனின் அரசியலமைப்பு

நான் ஒரு இலட்சியவாதி மட்டுமல்ல. என் கையில் நடைமுறை நடவடிக்கைகள் உள்ளன. மனிதநேயமாக நாம் செய்ய வேண்டிய உரையாடல் பருவநிலை மாற்றம், அல்லது போரை நிறுத்துதல், அல்லது நம்மை எதிர்கொள்ளும் எந்த ஒரு அழுத்தமான பிரச்சினை பற்றியும் அல்ல.
குழந்தைகளை எப்படி வளர்க்கிறோம் என்பதைப் பற்றி பேச வேண்டும். நாம் சமூகத்தின் வேர்களுக்குச் சென்று அங்கு மாறுகிறோம். இந்த அழுத்தமான தேவையைப் பற்றி உலக உரையாடலைப் பெறுவதற்கு நீண்ட நேரம் எடுக்கும், ஆனால் நாம் இங்கேயே பாண்டிச்சேரியில் தொடங்கலாம், ஒருவேளை ஆரோவில்லிலும் கூட இருக்கலாம்.

இதைச் செய்ய உங்களுடன் ஒரு குழுவைத் தொடங்க விரும்புகிறேன். உரையாடலுக்கு முன்வைக்க எங்களிடம் ஒருவித சாசனம் இருக்க வேண்டும், பின்னர் அந்த உரையாடலை செய்தி ஊடகங்கள் மற்றும் பாண்டிச்சேரி சமூக மற்றும் தொண்டு நிறுவனங்களுக்குத் தள்ளுவோம், மேலும் இதை நாங்கள் மிகவும் வலுவாகத் தள்ளுவோம். நித்திஷ் என்ன கஷ்டப்படுகிறார் என்பது போன்ற துஷ்பிரயோகங்களின் உதாரணங்களைப் பயன்படுத்துகிறோம். நாம் அழுத்தும் ஐந்து முக்கிய புள்ளிகள் உள்ளன.

எந்தவொரு குழந்தைக்கும் நாம் கொடுக்கும் முதன்மையான விஷயம் என்னவென்றால், அவர்கள் கடவுளை நேசிக்க கற்றுக்கொள்கிறார்கள் மற்றும் அவர்களின் ஆன்மா தேர்ந்தெடுக்கும் எந்த வடிவத்தில் அல்லது பெயரில் கடவுளைத் தேடுகிறார்கள், அது குழந்தை வயதாகும்போது தெளிவாகிறது. அது கடவுளாக இருக்கலாம் அல்லது பெற்றோர் பின்பற்றும் கடவுள்களாக இருக்கலாம், ஆனால், நித்திஷைப் போலவே, இது கடவுளின் வேறுவிதமான வரையறையாக இருக்கலாம். (அதை நான் இங்கே சேர்க்கலாம், அது தாய் அல்ல, சூப்பர் மைண்ட்.).

எண் இரண்டு, குழந்தைக்கு ஒரு ஆத்மா இருப்பதாகவும், அது அவர்களின் வாழ்க்கைக்கு ஒரு நோக்கம் இருப்பதாகவும் கற்பிக்கப்படுகிறது, மேலும் குழந்தை வளரும்போது அந்த நோக்கத்தைக் கண்டுபிடிப்பது குழந்தை மற்றும் பெற்றோரின் வேலை.

பெற்றோர்கள் நாத்திகர்கள் என்றால், அவர்கள் தங்கள் குழந்தைக்கு மனிதநேயம், இரக்கம், பச்சாதாபம், சுயநலம், தியாகம், தனிமனித மரியாதை, சுயமரியாதை, மற்றும் சிலவற்றைப் பெயரிடும் நேர்மை ஆகியவற்றில் உயர்ந்த இலட்சியங்களின் அன்பை வளர்க்கிறார்கள். நாத்திக பெற்றோர்கள் அந்தக் குழந்தைக்கும் கடவுளை நேசிப்பதற்காகத் திறந்திருக்கிறார்கள், மேலும் அவர்கள் குழந்தையின் இயல்பான திறமைகள் மற்றும் திறன்களைக் கண்டறிய முயற்சி செய்கிறார்கள், மேலும் அவர்கள் தங்கள் பள்ளிப் படிப்பிலும், அவர்கள் தேர்ந்தெடுக்கும் தொழிலிலும் குழந்தைகளை வெளிப்படுத்த உதவுகிறார்கள்.

மூன்று, சிறார் துஷ்பிரயோகம் என்பது அவர்களை உடல் ரீதியாகவோ அல்லது பாலியல் ரீதியாகவோ துஷ்பிரயோகம் செய்வது அல்லது குழந்தைகளை உணர்ச்சி ரீதியில் துஷ்பிரயோகம் செய்வது மட்டுமல்லாமல், உங்கள் பிள்ளையை கட்டுப்படுத்த வேண்டிய தேவைகளுக்கு அப்பால் கட்டுப்படுத்துவதையும் நாங்கள் வரையறுக்கிறோம். குழந்தை அன்பாக நேசிக்கும் குழந்தை, தாத்தா பாட்டி, நம்பகமான பெரியவர், யாராக இருந்தாலும் அவர்களுக்கு குறிப்பிடத்தக்க முக்கியமான ஒருவரைப் பார்க்க அனுமதிக்காததும் இதில் அடங்கும். இதில் அடங்கும் நித்திஷின் பெற்றோர்கள் அவருக்கு என்ன செய்கிறார்கள், மூளைச் சலவை செய்து, உளவியல் ரீதியாக அவரைக் கையாள்வது, அவர்களை நேசிப்பதற்காக, அவருடைய அமெரிக்க அப்பாவை அல்ல. துஷ்பிரயோகத்தின் ஸ்பெக்ட்ரம் என்பதற்கு அவர் ஒரு தெளிவான உதாரணம். அவரது உதாரணத்தை பாண்டிச்சேரியில் தெரியப்படுத்த விரும்புகிறேன்.

உடல் ரீதியான துஷ்பிரயோகம் என்பது உங்கள் பிள்ளைக்கு ஏதேனும் உடல் வலியைக் கொடுப்பது என வரையறுக்கப்படும், அதனால் அவர்களைத் தண்டிப்பதற்காக அல்லது அவர்களுடன் இழிவாக நடந்து கொள்ள வேண்டும். பாலியல் துஷ்பிரயோகம் என்பது உங்கள் குழந்தையின் பிறப்புறுப்பைக் குளிப்பாட்டுவது அல்லது மருந்து கொடுப்பது போன்றவற்றைத் தவிர வேறு எந்த வகையிலும் தொடுவதாக வரையறுக்கப்படும். குருச்சிக்குப்பம் நகர்ப்புற கிராமத்தில் அம்மாக்கள், பாட்டி, அப்பா, தாத்தா, அத்தைகள், மாமாக்கள் மற்றும் அருகில் உள்ளவர்கள் ஐந்து வயதுக்குட்பட்ட ஆண் குழந்தைகளின் ஆணுறுப்பை வைத்து விளையாடுவதை வழக்கமான நடைமுறையாகப் பார்த்திருக்கிறேன். இது இன்னும் அறிவியலால் அறியப்படவில்லை என்றாலும், நீங்கள் சிறுவர்களுக்கு அவ்வாறு செய்தால் அவர்கள் வளர்ந்து பெண்களை அவமரியாதை செய்கிறார்கள், மேலும் விளையாடுவது மிகவும் தீவிரமானதாக இருந்தால், அந்த பையன் ஓரினச்சேர்க்கையாளராக அல்லது குழந்தை துஷ்பிரயோகம் செய்பவராக வளர்வார்.

மேலும் நான்கு, கல்வியாளர்களை விட நல்ல மனிதர்களாக இருக்க குழந்தைகளுக்கு கற்பிப்பதில் பள்ளி அதிக கவனம் செலுத்தும், ஆனால் கல்வியாளர்கள் இன்னும் முக்கியமானதாக இருக்கும். அவர்கள் கற்றுக்கொள்வதற்காக எதுவும் கட்டாயப்படுத்தப்படாது, மேலும் அவர்களின் சொந்த விருப்பம் மதிக்கப்படும், மேலும் அவர்கள் மிகவும் சிறியவர்களாக இருக்கும்போது அவர்களின் விருப்பத்தைப் பயன்படுத்த கற்றுக்கொடுக்கப்படுவார்கள், எனவே அவர்கள் தங்களைக் கட்டுப்படுத்திக் கொள்ள முடியும். அவர்களின் பெற்றோரும் ஆசிரியர்களும் தங்கள் விருப்பத்தை மீறாமல் இருக்க கற்றுக்கொள்வார்கள்.

மற்றும் ஐந்து, உலகில் மாற்றத்திற்காக உழைக்கும் வேறு எந்தக் குழுவிலிருந்தும் எங்கள் குழுவின் சிறப்பியல்பு என்னவென்றால், நாங்கள் எங்கள் முறைகளில் முழுமையானவர்கள் மற்றும் துஷ்பிரயோகம் செய்பவரைக் கண்டிக்காதீர்கள் மற்றும் அவர்களின் மனிதநேயத்தையும் அவர்களின் சொந்த குணப்படுத்துதலையும் மறுக்கவில்லை. துஷ்பிரயோகம் செய்பவரை குணப்படுத்தும் செயல்பாட்டில் நாங்கள் ஒத்திசைக்கிறோம், ஒரு பயணியாக, அவர்களை தண்டிக்க வேண்டாம், கோபத்தையும் வெறுப்பையும் அவர்களுடன் சமாளிக்க வேண்டாம், இருப்பினும் துஷ்பிரயோகம் செய்யப்பட்ட குழந்தையை அவர்கள் மீது கோபப்பட அனுமதிப்பது குணப்படுத்தும் செயல்முறையின் ஒரு பகுதியாகும். துஷ்பிரயோகம் செய்பவரும் குழந்தையும் தயாரானதும், அவர்களுக்கிடையே தொடர்பை அனுமதிப்போம், அதனால் குணமடையும். இது முழுமையான குணப்படுத்துதல், ஆன்மா குணப்படுத்துதல், இயற்கையான சிகிச்சைமுறை, மரணத்திற்குப் பிறகு மரணத்திற்குப் பிறகு நாம் குணப்படுத்தும் முறை, இது இன்னும் அறியப்படவில்லை. நிதிஷ் அறக்கட்டளை இந்த குணப்படுத்தும் யதார்த்தத்தை உலகிற்கு காண்பிக்கும்.

அவர்தான் அதற்கான சந்தர்ப்பம் என்பதால் அந்த குழுவை நிதிஷ் அறக்கட்டளை என்று அழைக்கிறேன். அமெரிக்காவில், ஒரு புதிய குழந்தை துஷ்பிரயோக சட்டம் இயற்றப்படும் போது, ​​​​அதற்கு சட்டம் இயற்றப்படுவதற்கு காரணமான குழந்தையின் பெயரிடப்பட்டது.

This manifesto is written to the Pondicherry and local area social worker Masil Johnson, to Pondy, Auroville, and the world, by Donny Lee Duke, May 25, 2024, Usteri Lake, Tamil Nadu

The Big Stick

His YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/@s.nithish1830
A heartbroken line.
You just have to write this down.
There is no Earth and Heaven but you.
We glide here on our own devices.
We can’t see the world around us.
It’s blind to us too.
We can’t even see our yard.
There’s a process there.
It’s image on sight.
We have see things to believe in them.
Our fingers have to touch their face.
No other process allowed.
That’s the ring around the rosie for us.
It’s how we live.

It gets us in a lot of trouble.
We can’t always see things.
When people are away from us they’re gone.
We imagine their existence,
and it’s not real to us.
They’re not there.
Now tell me what to do?
Go outside and see things,
and try to transfer sight
to some bigger picture happening before your eyes.
Don’t just see your little world.
It’s gotten big enough
to swallow you whole.
We gotta get outta here.

It eats us alive.
It’s the only thing we know.
Can you see this?
Do you know what I’m talkin’ about?
We are blind before our face.
Our world is the world,
and there is no other
that has the reality of ours.
We can put this in a movie
or a sports field,
or maybe even a good book.
We feel something other than ourselves,
but we’re involved in it.
We’re still the center of the room.
Look at YouTube Shots.
They piece you to pieces,
this show, and that show, and this show,
and you have your favorites.
Where are they taking you?
They don’t know how to time.
They don’t stop.
You are lost there
in the middle of you.

I’m tryin’ to get to some larger whole
none of us see.
We’re divided up in pieces,
your world and my world
and Larry’s world.
Will we put our glasses on and see this?
It really sucks
you know when you lose someone.
Say you had a kid
and you’ve been raisin’ them since they were three.
At 12 you lost them,
and they were just taken from you
for no other reason than just to take,
‘cause you made someone mad.
Devastating.

It was a bubble relationship.
We were the captain of our ship
laughin’ at the world go by
we teammates, best friends,
together all the time.
We were joined,
and the world went by,
and we were so special in it,
so much comfort in each other,
so much love.
And then you lose that boy.
No contact is allowed,
and you watch that boy turn
like he never knew you,
and now he wants you gone.
No, no, I didn’t abuse him.
His parents did.
He was broken whipped and spanked
until he gave his parents what they wanted,
the keys to himself.
They can do that.
They’re Indian parents.
He was broken,
lost his will,
lost himself.
They spanked him,
and he cried and cried,
and I had promised to save him
and couldn’t come.
That anger rides.

What are we left with?
A quaking world.
Death would seem a happy state,
and I almost long to be there.
I want my boy.
I can’t take it.
There is no escape from this pain.
What do you do?
You feel pain.
You don’t know what to do.
There’s no way out.
Months ahead,
the death of a child.
There is no remedy for this.
I’m lost in him,
and oh the jesters of pain,
that kid could care less if he sees me again,
in just two short weeks.

Where do we go?
To death?
We have to do something.
We have to live.
We have to get up and live.
You’ve been fucked by the universe,
abandoned by your Gods.
All soul’s failed,
and you’ve got to find another life,
and you really want the one you had.
You’re stupid you tell yourself,
a fool.
Children are treacherous,
and they only like pleasure and joyrides,
and their heart can be bought with candy and cake,
and they forget you,
even when you were their whole world.

I’m dying in this pain,
and I’m just showing it to you
so you know of the reality of which I speak,
in some little lost world
forgotten from the whole.
To cut him out of my heart is blind.
That boy needs protected,
and he’s in a bad situation.
It’s an abusive situation.
I cannot abandon him.
I must go on
tryin’ to free him,
but the loss is too great to bear.
You see the predicament.

It’s going somewhere.
I am being perfected for him
in parental ways,
as he will need to be healed.
If he returns,
he will be healed
with certain hands.
I’m ready for him.
There is just this need to swallow,
this ever aching need
that he fulfill my life,
be its ornament,
and meet my emotional needs.
How can I get rid of this?
Don’t look at me funny.
You do it too
with children.
We are property lovers with them.

I don’t know how to do this,
and that is my lesson now.
It hurts.
Where do I find you?
In the lesson plan.
I’m reaching out to you
to be a lover with you,
to put down that kid a minute,
and let’s say hey look at this:
we are fragmented world.
Will you do the time with me?
It might be a pickup truck
that takes us all on a ride
to higher skies.
That’s where we think about larger things than ourselves
and the contents and people of our little world.
I’m pushin’ yah there
in my own flagpole
as I do this too.
Will you sing with me?

Will we be together again?
We come from afar.
This is not our home.
We’re on dangerous ground,
where the Void meets Earth.
There are doings here
that have us all undone.
We live out our lives
little people,
totally forgetting
who we are together,
the very next field
above this one,
the supramental field.

I’m ridin’ yah there,
journeying myself.
I don’t want to go.
All my thoughts on little boy
and what’s going on with him right now.
Is he happy is he sad?

Is he missing me?
Would he like to see me again?
Are they hurting him?
This goes deep.

Alright I’ve told you some
about what we don’t talk about:
look there’s a whole;
look there’s together again;
look we are bigger than what we are.
Have I reached out to you?
I can’t see it.
I don’t even know you’re there.
I think that’s a reality kingpin.
I’m alone in here
in front of all of you,
because of my perception.
Can you figure it out?

That is put to the finish.
Hey you got some things growing up there.
Tunnel things
this reality.
It’s trustworthy.
There’s no other way to see it.
We’re not real,
is that how far this goes?
Do you see what I’m gettin’ at?
Where is reality’s footing?
Where do we place ourselves?
In the center of attention?
I think we look higher up.
We look where it happens,
where reality gets arranged,
and we find ourselves there
watching the arrangement.
Isn’t that funny?
Here I am.

Suffer the supramental solution.
Sri Aurobindo
wrote his letters
just sittin’ there.
He didn’t see the disciples,
yet he knew they were there.
He didn’t have to see them.
He had concrete inner contact with them,
and he knew what was goin’ on.
He could see their own selves,
and he knew what they needed.

This was just vision to him.
No, this was the substance of his room.
He grabbed the whole with his own hand.
It was his messenger.
He substance see’d,
knew in relation to the whole,
and he could see without errors.
I cannot do that.
I have strong inner vision.
It doesn’t come
everything’s true
without errors.
It gets a lot of lie,
exaggeration,
and endless possibilities worked out.
I can’t see straight.

You don’t know how much this sucks.
I’m glued to inner vision
now to protect my kid
and bring him back home,
and it’s driving me crazy,
all these scenarios
played out one by one.
He’s been hit with a dog.
He’s been pissed on and raked
over an open fire.
This just kills me,
and I don’t know what to do.
The bad part is over,
when they broke him
to turn him from me.
Now they’re tryin’ to act normal,
and they want him to be happy.

Gaslighting is the order of the day.
What’s a kid to do?
Acquiesce
and be what their parents want them to be,
do what their parents want them to do,
and say what their parents want them to say,
and that’s what he’s doin’.
and I can have no contact,
and not a single person there will tell him of me.
It’s inhuman.
It’s a total blackout
they’ve arranged.
The abusers become his saviors,
and his beloved grandpa a foreign devil
tryin’ to take him from his family.

I was his main parent
from the time he was six.
Six years with me more than his parents,
and they’re gaslighting him
to make me some babysitter
they mistakenly arranged.
Okay public, what to do?
I’ve shown you his card,
a song he wrote himself
when his parents were pullin
and kicking him about school.
This is where he is at.
This is the boy on his own.
Where do we find him?
I hope that’s not the graveyard.
Can you come
and help me find him please?
I really need you,
and this is a live child
waiting for your help.
Can you help?
Oh Puducherry,
you couldn’t Aarthi.

Now there’s hope.
The boy’s alive.
How do I know he’s unsafe?
His father’s a killer for a Lawspet gang
with BJP connections,
but he hasn’t killed in awhile.
Says he’s done with it,
but see the gold on him you’ll know
he’s still involved,
a gold ring on every finger like a pimp.
He could kill that kid
in a jealous fit of rage,
and the mother’s of low character,
and she may not prevent him.
That's where this is headed.
Don't be sorry.
I’m calling on you now,
Puducherry,
rise up and protect that boy
before anything else is done.
Will you help me?
Can you take this boy to safety?
That’s wonderful.
Thank you.

This is the boy’s address in Puducherry, India:

64 Nettu St.
Kurusukuppam,

Puducherry, 605012

The street is only a small alleyway accessible from Advocate Chinnathambi St. Fourth Cross. Go to Le Nid Apartments on Advocate Chinnathambi Street, stand facing the gates and turn right 90 degrees and you will see a little alleyway in front of you. Go down it and it immediately turns left and his house is the first door on the left. There is also an Ave Maria Kebi on the left side of the apartment gates.

Nithish’s school and he’s in 7th standard: New Modern Vidhya Mandir Higher Secondary School, 73/A, Pillayar Koil St, Angalamman Nagar, Muthialpet, Puducherry, 605003

His father lives in Chennai and has a business there and comes to Puducherry on the weekends. Here is his business address:

P. Sundaram
S.S. Air Controls
No. 432 Pachaivalliyamman Illam
29th St. 6th Sector
K.K. Nagar, Chennai 600078

This is the address they spend the weekend at, usually from Saturday evening to Monday morning. It is his father’s parents’ house:

17 Kaman Koil Street,
Ashok Nagar,
Lawspet, Puducherry.

To Heal Holocaust

Watched this film, and then the second poem came, the long one, an hour after, and it came all night.

The Banality of Evil,
We’re Watchin’ a Different Movie


This is grand cinema.
You’re left wonderin’ over its price.
Are you opened to that puppy?
Just to the pain it caused.
Just to its wherewith with evil.
We need more from cinema,
powerfully done.
I’m the long ride.
I’ll get you there
on sudden bleeds:
you will identify with the snake,
or your heart pounding no.
I heal awhile.
Listen to me.

To Heal Holocaust
Heal God.
Boy God has done some bad shit,
if we count Him responsible for everything,
if we say He’s the doer here.
How do we get round this table?
And now the poem starts.
Let’s write it.

You must know into the most horrible places.
I’ve climbed down there
and got burned.
I can identify with the snake.
I’ve opened Holocaust doors
by beer-bottlin’ a boy.
He cried
and then got tough.
I hit him again and again
with that beer yard,
two or three boys.

It didn’t make me throw up.
I took pleasure from their pain.
The control I had,
I was in their control room and I knew it.
Their weakness turned me on,
their vulnerability.
I liked it.

This is a Holocaust memorial.
It’s not me writin’ on myself.
I showin’ where it came from,
that and a knife blade.
These smites
transform into big smites,
transform into Holocaust.
I'm helpin' you some.
I’m going ludicrous.
I’m just stupid sayin’ this.

Let’s change poems.
What do you feel when you hurt people,
your power over them?
No you feel your delight
that it’s not you.
We’re explorin’ some.
It’s a probe.
Not every formula has got this written on it,
but somethin’ happened to you,
when you could not fight back,
too little to do anything about it.
It scarred you.
Now you’re investigatin’ that reality,
and it’s your hands cause pain,
your thrust of life.

This is not healin’ you’re doin’.
You just keep doin’ it,
a wack in reality that repeats itself,
with your hands.
What do you do to stop?
I can’t get yah there.
It’s too wide open.
Jeffery Dahmer pulled the plug.
Then he started killin’ again.
You didn’t know he suffered.
You didn’t know
he didn’t turn that down,
his longness in the inner cycle.
Where do we go for change?
Wrapped up in an investigation of yourself,
you open the inner doors.

Really watch yourself in dream.
The plug will come up.
You’ll eventually pull it
the right way.
You just keep erasin’ mood,
that spell that comes over yah
when you’re around water,
when you’re at that place you can do it.
This is your fault line,
and it’s inner sprung.

You’ve got to get ahold of your behavior,
on the inside where it starts.
This ain’t hard/this is not easy.
[two above phrases heard spoken simultaneously]
You’ll see how it’s done
in your visual immune system.
Message,
it will message you.
It gives a little chance
for you to aim behavior rightly.

You’ve got to get ahold of the bull.
You’ve got to grab it by the horns.
I took years here,
in Holocaust denial.
It’s when you begin to see it it’s the hardest.
You can’t close the curtains,
even when you do it.
You can touch it
and move it around.
You’re puttin’ light down there.
This is not about feeling guilty.
This is about recognizing pain.

What is true remorse?
You feel pain buddy,
making other people suffer,
but you’re still not in the geography bowl.
Look on these two:
the ordination of love,
and the realizing of oneness.
How deep you have to go to get there,
how much time pass.

This is integral healing.
I know someone
that can’t even rise a fantasy.
The light got down there.
You feel the vulnerability of the other,
and you just want to hold them in your arms safe.
You can believe you did that.
You can see yourself doin’ it,
not playin’ it in your mind,
I mean it had sergeant over you before,
but you’re at peace with it,
and you put it out of your room.

We have no laws for this.
We’re not ready to find it.
There are too many of us
to make it safe.
It’s good for the environment.
I wasn’t so bad
I chained people.
I was a love roll.
I know you don’t understand this.
The assurities of Adolf Hitler,
that was absurd,
and afterwards so complex.
It was positively brilliant.
Wow, you said brilliant.
We would eat lunch there.
I’m not bragging it.
I’m not starring it.
Nobody has a secret weapon
to find change
in these dark waters.

I’m putting a healing light to it,
using my own brand.
You don’t know the fashion of evil.
You think it comes from us.
Its dark nature rises
from the Abyss.
There are creatures there
on a beanpole,
with tremendous might,
that invade our dreams
and conscious minds,
and tell our hearts to do things.
They are compulsion’s will,
and they are smarter than us.
Oh my God they’re there,
right in our room,
pushing us to fall.

What do you do with that?
Where do you put it?
They don’t give up,
and we have to put up with them,
on our world endeavor.
That’s not fair.
It’s not even funny.
It’s a stark reality
we have to live with.
So when you’re coming out of darkness,
you’re confronting these,
the Snake in your room.

Oh my God they are blind,
the ones who hate you
for the evil you have done.
They’re just self-righteous idiots,
and they will see when this is done,
when their life’s over,
the complexities of fate,
the manage devils in your room,
the horrible nature of reality
in its bottom lair.

We have to contend with this
to overcome fate.
We cannot escape it.
I’ve mentioned the ballgame,
what we’re really here for,
to change our nature
into God dwellers,
to spiritualize, divinize, Nature.
I’ve pulled the rank card,
and you are blind to this.
It’s too big.
It’s the science of changing your nature,
and your own process will see
that glory immune system,
the one I talk in visions and dreams,
the one I talk now.
It holds your hand here,
and now we are complete:
God heals.