Phrase the Incarnate Word

the Mother as a child
Okay you ready?
We got that thang fixed.
Okay yeah.
Everything watch manners—
there’s boats in the car.
The problem is with the Silver.
Take somethin’.
Take this over the top of your head.
Can you growl with me at cars?
A field of stars show
all this morality.
I’m in business for good,
and that’s how I pull your pants down,
get away with it.
I’m showin’ the Mother her feelins
when she was a little girl,
and my eye is ever on
what was made illegal in India:
offend people in their religion,
and they put you in jail.

Can a reformer speak?
We wanna change things for the better,
and we have to challenge religion to do it.
Religious sentiments need to change
so we can get past this stumbling block.
Alright I’m right there,
holdin’ my penis and showin’ flowers.
Where did you go?
You think I’d said the n-word.
Oh, wrong culture,
but you can hear America from here,
Indian.
We put everybody on trial.
I bet you don’t wear your genitals properly.
My God they’re beastly things,
all wrapped up.
No one wants to hear them.
I’m gifted speech,
a seer of divine wisdom
that has the sun in his sights.

Oh Supermind,
we can’t see a difference from Overmind
where our morality’s concerned.
Supermind
will stay right there by society
in where it needs to change
to bring harmony in the situation.
It isn’t fight with rules.
It breaks them,
and that’s how we change our lives
to get so much bigger
than any rule can make us.
Alright overmental keepers,
listen up.
I harmonize.

Well that shirt go to the other side.
Look at my fuckin’ numbers you mean.
There’s just a second
before I change in poetry,
and I bring so much literal verse
into a symbolized meaning.
You hear me cars?
Don’t run off.
I’m just tryin’ to explain
things you don’t wanna talk about.
You should’ve seen ‘er.
She fought that tongue,
but it didn’t bite ‘er.
In India—
I figured it was you.
I hold off more than I can chew.
So many open-minded Indians
I’m not mentionin’ in this book,
but I know you’re there.
I’m a seer of divine origin,
and I’ve got some thumbnails
to put out to the public.

Just wait a minute.
How often do you think?
It’s been a year
I’ve threatened you with green leaves.
This is the baseline,
where we genital one another,
talkin’ about the social consciousness
in our arisin’ morality.

Gonna get you there.
Does it stink?
It’s not a baseline of spirituality,
but it’s standard there.
We deal with these things
as we follow some yoga
or put on our sadhana.
They can’t be ignored.
The genitals are a loud gun.
No one deals with them properly.
We stuff them away
even evil to look at,
like they snake.
We have put them in marriage vows
so they can express themselves
without poundin’
the social fabric.
That was a temporary measure
made a long time ago
by the Gods to control us.

It’s tearin’ apart the social fabric.
We have genitals when we’re not married.
They reach out and bite us
if we deny them expression
and we are not mature enough for brahmachari,
celibate in our wears,
especially kids.
Do you know the confusion they feel
to have these little toys with handles on them,
and they get punished with they do,
or made to feel so ashamed?
They grow up a sexual question mark
that puts pleasure in the wrong place:
it’s not right.
Or they just go balls to the wall
as an adult
doin’ what was denied.

Let’s put the genitals in the right place:
they’re not ugly or mean,
but they need to be handled properly.
Just say no doesn’t work
if you haven’t worked out your sexuality,
experimented with its measure,
looked at its price.
How do we do this and heal
from sexual disorder?
Would a homosexual say that?
I don’t think we’re ready for soul process.
It comes on mastery in the ways.
It’s not a well of permissiveness,
but sometimes that’s the order
when all things are arranged.

Can I call upon the difference between soul process and divine process
to go under morality and show you this?
You’re just put in situations
where you work out
until you mastery.
No, the soul hurts no one,
but it’s open to the play,
urging you,
guiding you,
leading you
to right relationships between people,
and here in the well of eternity
that takes lifetimes.
We want the soul pressure up front,
the psychic being to take its seat
as the leader of the life,
and all the worlds dig this process
where we have evolution at stake,
but can I tell yah everybody’ll be brahmachari
when the world turns to spirituality as its profit motivation?
When you hit maturity for that,
like in your early thirties.
Some will be called earlier.

We’re headed somewhere.
We have a spiritual transformation ahead,
the whole damn world.
It’s headed towards Supermind,
right there in its soul change.
The genitals have to be put in place.
We have to wear them right,
and that’s not always covered up.
Can you see this?
We have to remove harm from them.
That’s not done easily.
It’s not done at all
by making them taboo.
Sri Aurobindo and the Mother
put their pencils down here
and left us all hangin’.

Oh the glories of the Victorian age
they were in.
It stuffed sex,
and neither one of them liked it.
Were they prudes?
The perverse habit is so natural to mankind.
What do we do with that?
Do we call our teachers liars?
They’re right there with us now.
You can hear them in my words.
I’m sorry I said that.
I know how that makes you feel.
Who am I?
I’m a seer of Sri Aurobindo.
I’m a poet of the Mother.
This bake—
I don’t have the clout,
and I’m a foreign man.

You don’t like foreigners.
You don’t understand.
It’s not something you look at.
I don’t think the collective sees this.
They wouldn’t admit it.
It’s such a feature of India
when you’re a foreigner
living here.
You get it all the time,
discrimination.
I can’t show you this.
You’re not a foreigner,
but can I show you your attitudes to me?
They suck.
They’re not right.

Okay dosa flavor—
you’ve got to incorporate mankind,
and all the idiosyncrasies of the Indian psyche,
the ones that block evolution,
have to be fielded and tested
and made to change.
A foreigner does that
in the Yoga of the Mother and Sri Aurobindo—
of course.
I just hear you praise yourselves
and look down on everybody else.
You can’t take criticism,
not even in the spirit of a sadhak.
Can I change?
That’s what I’ve done among you,
taken a horrible disorder
and India’d it.
No other place on Earth could do that.

The soul of India is wide and free,
and it is here Supermind came down,
and I’m right there in that cradle.

Now am I makin’ sense?
You see me.
I gave you the truth of my being.
It’s all in order,
settled down now,
a fit receptacle for the word,
and you hear it now.
My little boy’s there too,
trainin’ mode.
I’ll show ‘im to your shortly,
when we get ‘im back home.

Seen moved realty,
but no one’s lookin’.
Can you see guidelines?
We’d have to spell out each and every individual situation.
That can’t be done,
but can we understand our genitals have us in prison?
And when body parts get handled,
or even measured,
and it’s not get up and go that wedding ring,
we have a conniption.
Put a kid in there,
and you make them think they’ve been killed.
No this is not permissiveness speaking.
I’m just sayin’ don’t react
like it’s the end of the world.
Don’t hate the genital player
and want them dead.
Heal them.
Put ill will on the situation,
and everybody dies.
Let the genitals be free
from only sexual expression.
They can be out in public,
if they’re not horny.
Don’t be so uptight about them.
Give them room to breathe.

Give them room to grow
into a true genital opening.
That’s beyond touch.
It’s an esoteric chakra opening,
with no field play.
My God they’re good.
Are you tall enough for that?
It’s wonderful.
It’s ecstasy,
but it doesn’t touch another person,
and you don’t touch yourself.
Orgasmic in its intensity,
it flowers you there.
This is abstinence without denial.
It happens to the open vehicle.

You’re too prude for that,
adult Indian.
Did I just knock your nationality?
No I’m countin’ sheep,
and not just Indian,
but you can’t tell me there’s not prudishness here,
all over your rules and regulations
and moral reactions
involving the least little bit of nudity
not on ancient statues
or on some naked sadhu,
rare though he is today.
What exception makes you liberal?
Now let’s go to town.
We need to start the day.

One see how ugly it is,
even if there’s a divine calling
rock bottom potential.
What’s that supposed to mean?
What about that in your own bill?
Do you touch the stuff?
Spiritual technology
shows you how,
gives you that medicine ring on your finger.
Try to do it without fantasies,
glued to no one,
no other genital involved,
not even lookin’ at another body.
You’ve got your mind’s eye
in the pleasure of your own hand,
like a kid does it not teened yet,
remember?

You’ve got a blank white horse,
does not incur any wrath,
and it’s perfectly natural and clean.
That’s the way to do it
if you’re horny,
and you’ve haven’t achieved mastery yet.
Do you hear me Steve,
Gwendo?
Would you call that sex?
Feels good doesn’t it?
And that’s what you tell the child
you find them doin’ it.
It’s not a join hands.
You don’t rob them of their pleasure.
Okay sweetheart?
We’re all innocent here.

See if you could
let a poem come,
inevitable in its rose.
Do you hear me?
Pardon my English paper.
Language is on the floor.
You would write your need.
How’s that done?
Holdin’ back the thoughts,
an arrival comes.
It pops in
a sudden keeper.
You don’t hold it open with your thought.
You wait for the next line in blank mind.
It comes along the edges of your reason.
It surprises you
with its intensity
and its forward motion.

I could’ve just gone walkin’.
I lifted my voice and gave you a song,
with intent/purpose in it.
[above words heard spoken simultaneously]
I could’ve just given you a paper

the walls of the motion picture write.
You see it glows.
It wraps us all around
in the society of little business,
but you see the form
of its arrival from print-wood,
where it comes from the inner Void
a miraculous light in time.
Don’t just stand there, write.

This is a tender box.
Well it is,
and from that well comes the world
all on fire
with the mystery you can’t solve:
from where does the poem arise,
if it’s bigger than your piece of paper,
if it’s greater than your pen,
something bigger
than anything existence owns?
You want to touch it.
This is beyond consciousness.
I block it anywhere
I position myself in time
Monday through Friday.
My little boy
will get here
a sudden epiphany.
Impending arrival—
everything now it’s done.
Captures the wallpaper
of the mystery behind time
you never even heard of,
the mystery that wears a face,
giving this film a package delivery.
I wanna see it on the wall.
In a little while
I’ll have you in my arms,
in a little while.
[above three lines heard sung]
It was a soul wrote.

The attitude was small,
featureless in Auroville,
a flip cart.
It was a place into the opposite half,
busy with sex and let the world fall,
everybody who had arms in their pants.
There were very few celibacies.
It gathered there
watch the old house
where sex was concerned.
Abstinence was a penance
imposed upon Puritans.
Nobody flowered out the top of their head
an ascending orgasm,
what you waste when you masturbate or cum.
You don’t even know it’s there,
but let’s look at the spiritual consciousness,
Silent Mind in Overmind,
a way station along the way
that has to be done.
Do you know it’s there?
I’m sorry it’s not about the cells.
Abstinence will show you
when it’s not abstinence but integration,
and you desire can be right there in bed with you,
and you’re holdin’ your desire tight,
and you leave the genitals out of it.
Can you control mastery?
If that’s where you live you go.
Finding partners to sleep with
to test mastery fails.

We remain in place
and be that bigger than ourselves
and our surroundings,
and when desire no longer has your toes,
and you’re not bleedin’ reaction
but stayin’ calm,
still the mind;
in quiet peace comes.
You don’t even have to tell anybody.
Just do it.
Goddamn it feels good.
Let’s open ecstasy, shall we?
Now you’re in your room,
and Auroville can’t bother you anymore,
and just a few of you can change it,
just by being receptacles of the new wine
Auroville waits.
It’s a mountain now.

The Anarchs of Pain

photo by the author
They spill your blood.
They dust you off to kill you more.
They know just when to sooth you
and just when to bite.
They eat you alive,
and then laugh about it
like they care for you,
or you’re just not doin’ right.
They lead you by the hand
to amazing vistas of rose petals,
a dire love,
and then they cut your heart out
in the very place they called you love.

This is diabolical.
This is oh so sweet.
You have some semblance there
of hey hello it’s me;
I am your love, remember?
And those memories kill you
because they’re insanely not there
to make any more with you.
You can’t touch that.
You can only cry,
helpless heaving cries
that startle up your mind
to insanity’s fallout.
This touches you.
This laughs at you.
This enters your neck.

You are not there with them,
that little boy you love,
and he has lost his comfort zone,
I mean really his whole life,
to live in a shed
with grey bones to sleep on
and parents that finally get the chance
to rub his nose in it:
all these years for preferring me.
Do you get the picture?

They torture me with that,
the anarchs of pain,
and his pain rends my breast
and makes me want to kill myself
because I want to shoot myself for his pain.
What do I do?

I just sit here and tell you.
No one will listen.
We’re a racial mix,
and I’m in a foreign land,
and all’s people see is a red flag.
They don’t know what they’re lookin’ at,
and so they hurt us more,
thinking we’ve sinned
together as man and wife.
The boy’s 12.
You stupid people.
That’s not the relationship.

We have love
from the fountain of soul.
I’m afraid this is as close as you can get,
two people,
and we’re suffering for that now.
It’s there we love.
It’s there we hope.
It’s there we stand and face each other.
You don’t mind.
You only see yourself.

He’s forgotten about me.
They try to tell me that.
Oh he’s happy move on.
But then I meet him in dream and vision,
or talk to him on the phone,
a forbidden enterprise
he has to sneak to do,
and I’ve found him again
the lover of my life,
where he was when they didn’t see him.

Kids aren’t all on pain.
They’re not geared for that.
Their mask just allows the public to see
hey I’m alright;
look I play and laugh and sing,
but I’m not there you know;
I’m inside with the pain,
and you know I can’t hide it
always,
nor even very much.

So we’ve unlocked these doors,
the Furies that punish us
for so deep a love.
What type of love is this?
It's deep-seated parental feelings
more than anything else.
Can you get your head around that?
It’s boy love without the sex.
It’s a man’s embrace.
It helped hold the world together
in ancient times.
I’m his tutor.
I’m his love.
I’m his friend,
but most of all I hold his hand.
I’m the one who guides him through life,
and he is a spiritual arrangement.
I do not love him if I abuse him,
and that love starts my day,
where I hold this little boy.
There is no abuse here.
I do not cut his teeth on silver diamonds.

Can a kid handle this?
This has been humanity’s beef all along:
you can’t take children and put ‘em in a box
and make them obey there,
protecting them from the world
by protecting them from themselves.
This is an ancient relationship I tell you,
and it’s not bad, evil, or mean.
It’s as wholesome as the night sky,
as helpful as a forest moon.
You can read us
in volumes of poetry,
and the boy has videos,
and he’ll tell you about himself.

We have something new for the Earth,
and integral healing plan
that meets nature right where the Earth is,
so the soul can express itself.
We’re expressing soul.
Do you hear that?

We don’t know how to arrive.
We weren’t separated by parental concern.
I’ve been his erastes for six years,
a full on parental relationship.
He mostly stayed with me
for these half dozen years,
but I was at his birth.
He came into my life at one and a half,
as this little tyke I helped take care of,
and we have been doing this since he was three:
I was a parent in the room.

Now you can take this
and cut it up.
accuse us of pederasty,
but what you got here is two people in love,
whatever the form,
and it’s right relationship.
I test you to go and see.
We’ve left public record,
starting since when he was three.

Okay crowd,
we let the parents arrange this,
with their hate and their spite and their mean,
because they are jealous of our relationship?
And are at this very moment
forcing themselves on the boy,
and he doesn’t want that.
He wants to be home with me.

I’ve laid it all out on the table,
told you the story.
What do you want,
social change,
where kids meet bigger people,
or do you want the kids to remain the same
and do not change the nature of man,
so we can become better people and save the world?
I’m lookin’ you in the eye.
Engage our social media,
the boy’s and I.
We will change the world.

The boy’s YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/@s.nithish1830